Due April 2009: Episode 23 -There's no business like show business!!!

[SmuttyNuttyTaff]

Here we go

Show business may be good business but can we get on with some birthing business now please!!

Dammit I missed the questions Springy! Sorry, was not ignoring you..

poor DH, apparently I have had a small but extremely potent wind problem all night...

Puzzle, I am concerned by this knowledge...

Well, I'm not in labour & still no baby, but I don't think I could be much closer to being in labour without toppling over the edge, IYSWIM.

I was sick again after I went to bed last night & kept having the strange contractions. My head was still very strange & whooshy - it still is, a bit.

Eventually sort of fell asleep & have had a night of vaguely snoozing, but not really being able to sleep. I'm hoping to go back to bed in a minute, to be honest.

This morning, I have that 'mask of pregnancy' thing - the dots of red pigmentation - in a massive way. It's worst all around my eyes, but continues all over my face & is very, very obvious. I'm not sure if it means anything, but it's not the most attractive thing either way.

I have checked my cervix (but not eeled it ) & it's very low, with the head engaged. I only have to put my finger in so far as just past the middle knuckle & I can feel his head. It's a bit freaky.

I also have a really annoying thing where I feel like I really need to wee / poo but I don't need to do either at all. Not even a little bit. I was worried that the weeing thing was going to be due to an infection, but I'm pretty sure it's not. Especially as I've been taking cranberry tablets to avoid it.

LO is very quiet & has been since the middle of last night. I occasionally feel him flutter around in there, so I know he's okay. But he's very, very quiet. I may go to the hospital later to get checked. Not even because I'm worried about him, but because I want to know what's going on & it's worth them having a look to make double sure that he is okay.

Oh! & I have a weird thing where if I prod my bump on its bottom left side, it really hurts & keeps hurting quite a lot for a few seconds after I stop. I don't know what that is, but it didn't half wake me up when I was trying to scratch it in my sleep...

So yes, things are definitely happening, but not with any sort of urgency it doesn't seem. It'll all probably stop & go away for a few weeks now anyway.

Sounds like you are gearing up Springy - I did ask my cervix to have a stern word with yours and clearly it has worked

And of course mine is being polite and waiting until you have had your baby

Springy - needing to poo but not actually needing to poo is a classic symtom of early labour!

I read an interview with Grace Jones the other day talking about the birth of her son. She was convinced she was just constipated and was knocking back laxitives until she finally pushed out a baby!

Yes, it seems that I am - but nothing's really kicking off, so it's a bit odd. It feels quite a lot like he's going to just fall out of me when I try & walk, though! (If only it were that simple... The cord would make a great bungee )

So, those questions you didn't answer...

I'm sure that was pleasant, given the lack of bodily control during the pushing

I don't expect this to come to anything, but only because it seems impossible that it ever will, & I know that I'm still only 37+3. But it's slowly beginning to seem a lot more possible that it could be that I am having a baby & that it really might come out at some point, even if it's not this week.

Very tame, although it slightly worries me that there's one unnaccounted video probably still roaming the internet. Not good in my profession

I am funny like that - 70% deathly shy and 30% utter show off - most people only get to see the former though!

You will not be surprised to hear I have no problem distinguishing between needing a poo and needing a baby btw! But I know what Grace means...

OK - anyone mind if I have a bit of a personal rant? Very much off topic, but I can't face the crazy bitches who frequent the AIBU boards and I need to get this off my chest.

Am becoming increasingly convinced that one of DHs colleagues is making a play for him. For a little while he has been coming home with little gifts - first a rare live recording of a band they both like, then 'kitty porn' (this turned out to be a DVD of birds, squirrels scampering about looking tasty etc to liven up the life of indoor cats as apparently DH chats about Billy at work quite a lot). Last night a copy of 27 Dresses (some chick flick with Katherine Heigl in) emerged from his brief case. Haven't seen it, but thought it was a bit odd as striked me as a total chick flick. Just read the synopsis on the back and says that the character is 'secretly in love with her boss' .

Aside from the gifts there have been other things. She quite often calls on very much non-work hours - eg. 8pm on a Friday night purportedly about a work related issue and then the conversation seems to turn to chit chat and gossip (conversations up to 45 mins long!). Then she recently announced that she wanted to leave the company but said in private to DH "If you asked me to stay, of course I couldn't refuse"

I honestly think that if he had anything to feel guilty about he would a) not take calls from her while I am sitting there. b) definitely not tell me that she said she would stay if he asked her to or relay any other conversations that they have.

Nevertheless she seems to be hurling herself at his feet and I have no idea what to do about it, other than trust him not to do anything daft.

Morning. Okay OddEyes you win! Congratulations. I did have two shots left but decided to give up when I went to bed. Didn't count on you being so competitive

Schulte is not a happy bunny today. I didn't sleep much at all, getting up about once an hour to go to the loo. Then at 5am the bag that closes off our chimney in the bedroom came falling down, with a lot of dust and dirt, and I hurt my foot on the bedpost jumping up. Had to go downstairs and get the broom and clear up the mess as best I could, then of course couldn't go back to sleep. DD woke at 6 and came into my bed and was grumpy all the way through cuddles, washing and dressing, and breakfast, with tears and shouting every 5 minutes approximately. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Can't wait to go back to bed now but cleaner is here and boiler man about to arrive too

I'll see what you got up to last night now and hope it will cheer me up!

I think I'm a bit like that. I've never done anything like that, but I can see that I perhaps would. Even though I'm generally not 'that sort of person'. I think it comes out a lot more when I've been drinking - I find it a LOT easier to ask for what I want during sex, etc. Normally I'm a bit shy & self-conscious. I can see why it'd be fun to do stuff like that, though

& with the amount of that sort of stuff on the internet, I think your chances of it ever turning up to trouble you are fairly slim.

Schulte - sorry about your night's sleep. Can you have a lazy day today to make up for it?

I've got to take DD swimming as we both had colds last week so didn't go but the poor thing has been putting swim nappies on and trying to climb into her swimming costume for the last couple of days. Have managed to tackle the fuzz on my legs but I feel bloody ridiculous in a bikini with this bump!

LuLu, I don't know what to say, but it does sound like she's being very inappropriate & YAreallyNBU.

27 Dresses is quite a good film (in a chick flick sort of way), & although she is secretly in love with her boss, her boss turns out to be a complete twat. So if it is some sort of coded message, she's not thought it through very well.

Have you asked him about it at all?

& MM, of course you can tell the difference - you'd just feel around to see if it was poo wanting to come out

Lulu - sounds like she knows exactly what she's doing, but he's fairly oblivious. Tricky - she needs to butt out, but you don't want to ruin their good relationship or make him feel too self-conscious.

Come on relationship gurus, I'm rubbish at this - only been married 6 years plus my DH is a total one-off alien anyway

Schulte That sounds like a rubbish night! I hope you can try & take it easy today xx

Yeah, I have no idea. I had to sit & insist that DH would not be going to his ExGF's house again last night (she came up during the whole Nuts conversation) & he just couldn't work out why I thought it wasn't the best plan because he doesn't have feelings for her. Eventually I managed to point out that she's a poisonous, manipulative bitch who likes male attention at any cost, but I'm really not the best person to advise on how to deal with these things! Sorry. But FWIW, you're well within your rights to be annoyed with her.

Ha ha ha - does sound like she may have got the coding wrong.

I haven't broached the subject wtih him directly. I am a bit wary of doing that. At the moment I think he is genuinely oblivious to the fact that she seems to be after him. Otherwise surely he would conceal the gifts, not mention conversations etc etc.

One of my closes male friends has actually written a book about infidelity so perhaps I should consult him.

Oh, I agree that he doesn't seem to have a clue. At worst, he's vaguely aware of it but not interested, I think - he's being far too open, as you say. Men are useless at picking up hints, especially when they don't consider themselves to be on the market. It's bad enough when they're single.

Springy, you are right of course..I would have a feel..but you know what it creeps me out when women want to 'feel' the head being delivered during birth (or watch it in a mirror )...such double standards..

Yes, I don't understand the mirror thing at all! That's really not a good thing in my mind - I'd be there, pushing out the baby & then catch sight of it & freak out, screaming 'put it back in!'

MM - that is definitely double standards.

I can't say I had any huge desire to see DD crowning (certainly didn't want DH to videotape it or anything! Who on earth would you show that to!?) but if I had been able to see what was going on, maybe it would have been motivating for the final couple of pushes. I don't know.

After everything you have suffered and endured during this pregnancy you would seriously tell them to put it back in!!!!!

I did have a look once the head was out - was very weird, that blue baby head hanging between my legs.

LuLu, if it was my DH I'd just point it out to him that she's obviously very interested. I'd then expect him to behave to her in such a way that she stops it. It's good though that he tells you everything, so definitely not anything to worry about I would think.

Oh by the way I watched 27 Dresses yesterday and thought it was utter cr@p. And certainly not a film a man would enjoy.

And the award for most terrible mummy ever goes to.......... Claireykitten. My ickle man has a black eye and I have no idea how he got it!