Due May 2009 - our bellies are getting as big as Santa's

[FiKelly]

It'll be an alternative merry Christmas for us this year ;)

I am so glad I am not alone with the sex of bean situation.

My MIL (very very uber toxic) keeps saying she wants a boy, she had a boy and a girl but I have a younger sister and although we had our cat fights we are so close and I remember playing teachers and tea parties even wanting to share our rooms so we could have a 'sleep over' every night...

I feel sad now

I know I will get a few comments from my MIL if we end up having a girl but I am prepared for them..

But I said to my husband the other day that I would feel very sad if I didn't get my sisters especially as they are going to be so close in age. I know it is me being selfish but I honestly think I will cry..

I need to find out so I can deal with it as I suffered PND with my dd, only just stopped the counselling and to be honest I don't recognise myself in the early photos of my dd.

But on the upside a healthy baby is a blessing and I would only probably be sad for a split second.. anyway hope you have a good wed! Play group is back on thank goodness, can sit and talk to adults

Hi all, i like all that you've written on the girl/boy split. there are a lot of good things about both and I know I'll be happy with a girl or a boy.

Hope all are well today.

You have a 50% chance of a boy and 50% of a girl each time you conceive - doesn't matter whether you have already got girls or boys or not.

1stMrsF - well that makes total sense doesn't it, but several doctors have told me the 75-80% statistic for having a 3rd child of same sex if your first 2 are the same. Not sure how this works, but it does seem to be a recognised stat. Maybe it just assumes that these particular fathers must have a higher proportion of female / male sperm? Apparently some men have all girl or all boy sperm? (apparently???......) - although not sure if this is actually a proven fact?

It's just a complete lottery what you get IMO!

By the way 1st I don't remember if I ever said congrats to you on your two girls - so lovely. I've got 2 girls (not twins obviously though) and it's great! My DH is quite jealous of you I think (he adores having his girls). Although think he's starting to get his head round the idea of a boy..........poor man was convinced he was going to have 3 little girls.
Right am going to do some work now....Byeeee!

Congrats on the scans, those who've had them in the last couple of days

Dandy you make a really interesting point about relationships with parents influencing preference for a girl or boy. Sorry to hear you had a difficult time with your Mum Although I must stress I do have a very good relationship with my Mum, she definitely gave me a harder time of it than my younger brother. I occasionally feel judged by my Mum in a way my brother never has been, especially in terms of appearance (this is something I've always been more confident about than her, and one where she suffered some horrible comments from her own mother). I was looking forward to having a girl so I could 'right' that 'wrong' and break the cycle so to speak.

DH on the other hand has a more relaxed relationship with his mum than his dad and would partly have preferred a girl because of that.

But, hey ho, children are all individuals and hopefully we'll have a fantastic relationship with our son that's not too clouded with baggage from relationships with our own parents.

Meanwhile, I've finally succumbed to a bug I'm not too bunged up but have a horrible cough and sore throat. Wish there was something I could take for it but I'm sure kick-ass cough medicine is off limits.

Interesting...one of the reasons why I am so glad to be have a second boy is because I have a younger brother and am keen to avoid comparisons with the way my parents raised us. Odd, isn't it?

I've spent another 2 hours being poked and prodded at the hospital today, this time for a routine appointment with the consultant. I still have protein in my urine but my blood pressure is now really low, when usually it is high. I don't feel great and spent most of the day yesterday asleep, so I wonder if I have some sort of bug. Anyway, thankfully they don't want to see me until week 26, so they can't be that concerned. I've decided to stay off work today anyway, as I still have a headache.

Just had my 22 week scan - baby was lying sideways facing us and scratching his/her ear. Very cute. All seems well.

Quite glad we didn't find out the sex in the end, as it will be a nice suprise at the birth. Mainly I'm just relieved that everything is developing normally and the baby looked so sweet and content!

Interesting stuff here- I also have a younger brother and did feel like my mum would take his side, partly because they made it quite obvious that they really wanted a boy. Now I have a DD and a DS, I find myself mostly taking my DSs side in any trouble since DD is older, can articulate things and understand things more. I feel bad as I don't want her feeling towards me like I felt about my mum, but I keep telling myself that I don't remember much before the age of 5, and that once DS is a little bit older, he can understand things more and i can be stricter with him. It's funny that although he doesn't say many words "milk", "hiya", "no" etc, once of his early words/phrases was "my turn" so he does understand that we have to take turns sometimes.

Well back from my scan and all is well... BUT..or AND.. it's another boy! (topical non, given today's discussions?). I felt a surge of disapointment so I guess I was hoping for a girl, but there are many practical advantages as people are telling me already! Guess I'll have to give up on the pink bugaboo bee I had my eye on, and prepare for a life of washing smelly rugby kit (unless they get my sporting (non)ability - there is hope still).

For those of you worried out there, I have a great relationship with mum and my brother is a TOTAL mummy's boy, so it can be done. As long as my boys have don't look to their father and his mum for an idea of a relationship we'll be fine. But as we are not our mothers, I AM DEFINITELY NOT my mother in law!!

I remember when I had my 20 week scan with DS. I was SURE I was having a girl, and remember having dreams of a little blonde curly haired toddler. I was shocked when the sonographer told me I was having a boy. In fact, I remember asking her if she was sure, because I knew it was a girl!

I remember feeling disappointed because I'd prepared for a girl, and I wondered what on earth we'd do with a boy.

Once he was born I wouldn't have changed him for the world, and was over the moon to find out that he would be having a little brother. I can't imagine life with a daughter now, and I shall admit to a feeling of secret pleasure that this next one is a boy. I'm sure if we were to have a girl I'd be pleased, but it is a very odd feeling to describe.

Gender is very interesting, I think.

alapala, congrats on your scan and having a boy! you're right on the bonus of having two (or more) of the same.

we all can truthfully say what we would like (ie, I'd love a boy) but I know we'll all be happy with the little person, whatever the gender, who arrives.

i was thinking about what someone said in treating sons/daughters differently and I suppose it would be easiest if we do have a 3rd girl - relationships, clothes-sharing, gender toys, etc. so, we'll see come early May !

anyone still having cravings? I've lost most of mine with this flu but, saying that, have just scoffed half a bag of S&V kettle chips with cheese dip. guess I'm making up for my Christmas fast or baby's trying to tell me something!

I have my 22 week scan next week.

Interesting that people are saying their younger brothers had an easier time. IMO my younger sister got a much easier time than I did. I think it may be soemthing to do with being the younger child rather than the gender.

I am not going to find out the gender at the scan. Is anyone else not going to find out? As long as it is looking healthy and well I will be happy.

I currently have one of each already so not sure I am that bothered either way what gender it is. Or put it this way I have no strong feelings either way about what I will be having. Plus all my newborn clothes are white/cream/neutral anyway so I don't need to know for practical purposes!

Hi everyone

This talk about gender and families is quite funny.
We have 2DD's at the moment and most people including mil say's 'I bet you hope it's a boy this time' but my answer to them all is 'if it's a girl we can always have another go!!!!'

MIL only had 2DC's [1 of each] and she thinks 3 is more than enough if not too many.....

True about the serving men. When I first got married if I went to visit my family for a few days without DH (if he had to work) my mum used to ask me what I had left him to eat! I used to reply that he was a grown man and perfectly capable of shopping and cooking for himself. She doesn't ask me anymore. DH and I are both graduates.

However my sister leaves meals for her DH if she is out. Apparently he can't cook . Plus she is younger than me and works more hours. Although she doesn't have any DCs.

I suppose it is hard for me to comment on gender as we were all girls when I was growing up (apart from my poor old dad!)

Because of this having a boy of my own has been quite an eye opener! I was telling my friend who has girls about certain aspects of boys and she was quite shocked!

Hey all,
Very interesting posts today, can identify with it totally.

I am eldest of three with two younger brothers. I have always felt I had it much harder the other two, especially being judged on appearance, comments on what I ate, wore, etc... and that was from a woman who worked and did feminist campaigning in the 60s and 70s!! But interestingly I was talking to the elder of my two brothers about it a few months ago, and he felt that we (him and I) had it much much harder than our youngest brother but there is a massive gap between us and him. He also said he thought I had it harder as Mum relies on me emotionally since my dad and her divorced, whereas she doesn't really talk about things like that with my brothers!

After being convinced about having a boy, I dreamt I had a daughter last night... am so not sure about whether to find out or not, think I will just leave it up to DH to choose on the day!

Anyway, off to put another jumper on, think our heating is broken!

Hi all. Really interesting chat today. We're having a boy (is it my imagination or do there seem to be more boys due?) after a dd. Neither dh nor I had a preference, but aside from practicalities of having lots of pink, I am over analysing thinking that it is good this way as I was one of two girls. Will be interesting to see if I can step back when they're a bit older and see if I am treating them differently. My (older) dsis definitely was treated much harsher than me, but then again, I was perfect

PS Spangle get well soon. I hate to say it, but that's how my horrid disease just before Xmas started and left me with a hacking cough for 3 weeks

Thanks for the great conversation about sex of babies - I feel much better about my original reaction when I heard I was having a boy. I am also feeling much better with SPD pains having taken it really really easy yesterday. So planning to do more of that!

How cold is it?! I'm off to cook my tea order some Pizza and try to ignore the bumps and playing noises coming from the DC in bunk beds upstairs...

Evening all,

Well I have been busy thinking about baby boy names, and if you have any comments, they would be much appreciated. I want something that can be shortened, and also that goes with Katie and Ben. I can tell you my surname if it helps- I've already outed myself on facebook on here so not many secrets now!

Aidan (Ade)
Charlie (Charlie)- don't really like Charles
Daniel (Dan/Danny)
Finley (Finn)
Harrison (Harry)
Jacob (Jake)
Oliver (Ollie)
Samuel (Sam/Sammy)
William (Will)
Zachary (Zach)

I might even brave the baby names topics to test the names out, although guess there's nothing too outrageous in there for people to get worked up about...

I always thought I'd want a girl, but my sister has a DD and DS (both under 3) and they're equally fantastic. So I've stopped worrying about it really. Don't think the sex really matters, and gender is more about sexual identity which is dictated by society so I'm going to try my damndest to treat the baby equally regardless of sex (and avoid cliches of pink for girls, and trains/guns for boys etc). Easier said than done, I'm sure!

pulapula - I like William but shortened to Billy and also Daniel shortened to Danny out of your list. How about Jonathan shortened to Jonny?

As for names I am liking Verity for a girl (but DH hates it so won't be having it) and Gregory for a boy (DH also hates this too )