Due April 2009 - Saucy dreams, squirting boobs and spacehoppers. Whatever will the April mums get up to next?"

[PuzzleRocks]

Sorry gingersarah but lol at you shouting at your boss!

its so lovely when your bump has a bit of a pary always makes me grin like an innane idiot but again who cares tis a crazy/wonderful feeling

party not pary soz :-)

ah bb i forgot about that .... i have been looking i forgot to write them down though (doh) will have another looksee and post a lil list one i did want to mention is a variation of Aslan which is Atlan means the same thing just diff spelling (you dh was a bit keen on that one i seem to recall)

Ginger, I am actually not at all cheerful if truth be told. I have been toying with the idea of a termination, but because I know only too well what brutal things they do to poor little babies of 23 weeks to kill them off during terminations, I have backed away from that for now.

Sorry if I have put a damper on the conversation everyone.

Boffin (hugs) xxx i dont really know what to say apart from would you like a chocolate hobnob?

This guy walks into a bar in Arkansas and orders a white wine. Everybody sitting around the bar looks up, surprised, and the bartender looks around and says: "You ain't from around here, are ya... where ya from, boy?"

The guy says, "I'm from Iowa."

The bartender asks, "What th' hell you do in Iowa?"

The guy responds, "I'm a taxidermist."

The bartender asks, "A taxidermist... now just what th' hell is a taxidermist?"

The guy says "I mount animals."

The bartender grins and shouts out to the whole bar, "It's OK boys, he's one of us!"

Oh Boffin, please don't worry - you haven't put a damper on the conversation - this is not an AIBU thread!!! One we don't shout and too we have chocolate hobnobs - well Nutty does!!

I think it is natural to doubt when things are tough but we're here for you - to bounce ideas off and talk through your concerns. Is there anything we can do to help?

Nutty - where on earth do you get these from!

Boffin - in all seriousness (cheer up tactics of choc hobnobs and jokes aside) is there anything any of us could do for you that would help you feel a bit better? i would quite happlily send a pick me up parcel if it would help? (not much i can do from the confines of my sofa but i can shop :-))

A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at this woman and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately told her to undress.

After she had disrobed the doctor began to stroke her thigh. Doing so, he asked her, "Do you know what I'm doing?"

"Yes," she replied, "you're checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities."

"That is right," said the doctor. He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do you know what I'm doing now?" he asked.

"Yes," the woman said, "you're checking for any lumps or breast cancer. "Correct," replied the shady doctor.

Finally, he mounted his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked, "Do you know what I'm doing now?"

"Yes," she said. "You're getting herpes; which is why I came here in the first place."

THat one is my favourite I think....

Hi Boffin,

Sorry to hear things are so bad. I am not surprised you are wobbling under the pressure, it sounds very grim.
I wonder whether things will seem better in the new year - this is a very dark time of the year for many people, literally and emotionally. Very very best of luck.

Morning everyone.

DP has apologised & said that he didn't mean what he said, blah blah blah. We'll see how it goes, but at least he knows that he was an arsehole. If it was just this once, I'd cut him some slack, but it's fairly regular.

& it's not that he's in denial about the pregnancy, either - sometimes I think he's more excited about it than I am. He's just resentful that I've changed since becoming pregnant - I'm usually really thick skinned, but recently I'm quite easy to upset or offend. I know it must be difficult to live with, but he has absolutely no patience with it.

I am hoping that there is a light at the end of the tunnel though - you've given me some positivity where I felt there was very little. Thank you xx

More importantly, are you okay Boffin? Don't worry about talking to us - I came on last night purely to cry onto the thread & left (which, oddly, made me feel quite empowered to just leave him to it instead of trying to fix things - I had the power of my girly friends behind me!) & nobody seemed to mind. We'd all much rather you spoke to us & made yourself feel a little better & asked for any help if you need it than suffer in silence...

Boffin - just posted on your aibu xx

Boffin - just posted on your aibu xx

You are all loves.

I am scoffing two virtual hobnobs and the jokes are very funny, but I am still crying and wiping my eyes on my dressing gown belt (I am not dressed yet).

I am worried about these things:

1. My DH leaves for work at 7.45am and gets back 8.45pm most days, as sleeps a lot at the weekend out of breadwinner exhaustion, and I am wondering if I have worn myself out trying to cope with everything while he is out of the picture, and if this is why I have got SPD (I also leave at 7.45 usually and get back 7.30, but obviously not at the moment). Add a new baby into the mix and I just don't see how I can cope, as I can't walk much or do many things around the house. I have got an au pair but they take a lot of maintenance and TLC too, so it's not a dream solution by any means.

1. My children are starting to go a bit dysnfunctional as I can't do anything with them and I am very grumpy at home a lot of the time. I think they miss the old me. Just at half term we were doing running races in the park - now look at me.

1. I work in a very competitive field and while everyone is being nice on a personal level, if I am off too much I will end up being academically sidelined forever. I have seen this happen to others. It has taken me ten years of major graft and angst to get this far and I am worried it will all just drift away.

1. I can't do any moonlighting at the moment for extra money and I have to go for (private) root canal treatment tomorrow (no NHS endodontists here), which like the last lot will have to sit on my credit card apparently forever. We've got other debts even though we live very carefully and sensibly indeed, for the same reasons that everyone else has at the moment, and that really bothers me. And so does the thought of root canal treatment on a very infected, angry tooth that might not take an anaesthetic.

1. I look a right mess at the moment and smell wierd. Usual pregancy stuff.

sorry double post keeps bloody doing that

SPD is one of lifes (fecking awful) curveballs, you cant bring it on yourself

if it makes you feel any better my lovely outspoken daughter told me that she really didnt like me at all right now because i'm no fun and not a happy mummy and all i do is sit on the sofa and have a go at her and that because of this she only wanted daddy cos at least he can run and play and isnt grumpy and thats why she only loves me a little bit and she will only love me properly again when i stop being a meany cowbum!!!!

i cried all day and all night dh got her to apologise but she still said it .....was bloody awful. so i know where your at

try to look at it as you only have 4 months to go then you will be normal again it will give you something to aim for

could you keep up with your studies on the net somehow or get people to bring the stuff that you need to keep up to you? this may help take your mind of it even a lil bit or is that not possible?

try to stay positive even if the thing you're most positive about is yay i got out of bed, as this is an achievement in itself somedays
xxxxxxxx

Hey Boffin

1. I am not a doctor but I don't think that is why you have SPD - I am sure the stress doesn't help but from what I have heard (and I am no expert), it can happen to anyone and you will cope - you sound like you already cope amazingly well with what you have!

1. Your children do miss you I am sure but they are surprisingly aware and are probably more upset that you are hurting. You will be back to normal soon and they will forget it ever happened!

1. Is there anyway you can work a bit from home? I am a bit scared about the same thing during maternity leave hence only taking 3 months off! Again not much we can say other than you sound like a very determined and committed person and I am sure you are too valued to be sidelined and will do everything in your power to make sure it doesn't happen!

1. Ouch for the tooth and if it's any consolation, I don't know anyone that hasn't got debts at the moment - we re still paying off our wedding from last year and all our good plans don't seem to come in to reality!!

1. You are amongst friends with this one!! Hands up to all those who are sat at work with spotty skin having not brushed their hair this morning!!!!

Only two? Come on! Take the whole pack!

You & your DH work such long hours! No wonder you're both exhausted. I don't know much about SPD, but my mum had it with my little sister & that was nothing to do with pushing herself too hard. It was just something rubbish that happened. Don't blame yourself.

As I said on your AIBU, as rubbish at this is, it is temporary - your children may not be able to have their mum running around in the park with them at the moment, but that will change. It will get better.

As for the getting sidelined, there's little that you can do, to be honest. Just remember that they can't obviously damage your career because you've got heaps of legal rights. I don't know how likely it is that you'll suffer professionally for this, but I'm sure that it seems worse at the moment because you're worried about everything else. & you're clearly very good at what you do & have been very successful, so I doubt that'll change now. Everybody will understand that you're too ill to do much.

Money is a complete pain in the bum, but there's nothing that anyone can say about that. Obviously it's a rubbish financial situation at the moment for everyone, but that too will get better. I hope the dentist isn't too awful.

& as for the looking a mess & smelling weird, you're certainly not the only one there.

Honestly, you'll be fine. It's just a really, really tough time at the moment, but you'll pull through it. & we're always here when you need us.

Springy - Glad DP is feeling bad!! Good start to the day - and what with your package coming a bit later things are looking much brighter!!!

BabyBolat, the package just arrived. But so did an envelope with stuff that may fix my laptop in it from my dad, with a lovely paternal note. I don't want to open the package just yet now...

springy - humble dp & a buzzy buzz treat what more can a girl aske for eh

Who says women are difficult to please?

Also thanks for offer of care parcel, Nutty. xx You are truly lovely. Virtual one will do xx

Advice and thoughts very helpful, people. Going to have a bath now so it must be helping.

(If I am not back online in half an hour I have probably got stuck in there so come and get me!)

Hello all! Sorry for everyones difficulties.

boffin - SPD is the worst - not long to go keep the end in sight - 14 weeks till term and they can bring you on before that too if need be. i still not up, haven't really been up properly these last 6 weeks and am sure I smeel worse - pregnant sweat and stale urine

springy - pregnancy does do some weird and wonderful things to relationships, hopefully coming through this will make you guys stronger. it has been in our hardest times that we have learnt to communicate and understand each other better.

what happened to the blooming second trimester - i think it is something I am destined never to see in a pregnancy!

My update: Admitted to hospital yesterday morning. spent whole day giving histories to 4 different docs as was past from piller to post. was x-rayed, poked and prodded - have pneumonia! Silly to say, but am pleased! Feel justified for feeling rough, being off work and complaining for last 6 weeks. 3rd course of antibiotics should kick it, and lots of rest - not sure how i communicate this to ds who is already bored of mummy. also they said that i have split my stomach muscle - need to go google this.

hospital bag - have decided to make one after to dh made a paniced one yesterday for me, the love. He came in with my pj bottoms from last week which are urine soaked, last weeks smelly old unwashed vest with stains down front, dressing gown without belt, ill fitting bra, half a packet of crisps...made me even more determinded to discharge myself. if i had had to change into that they would never of let me out and crossed all the boxes previously ticked about personal hygiene. also sitting in mdu in the morning watching other women being admitted, listening to their suprise and worries made me think - need to be ready. there was a 20 weeker with the highest blood pressure ever being admitted with her toddler in tow. made me so thankful for nursery and all the folk we able to call upon.

the joys of pregnancy!
Oddeyes 21+6