Due Dec 08 -- Getting Ready for final push (in every sense!)

[Beans33]

Here's a new thread for us all lovely Dec Mums!

Beans 27 weeks??? You're on the wrong thread then I'm afraid!

beans glad your enjoying your maternity leave!

katie my nesting has gone awry so there's plenty of cleaning here if you want it

Am off to Westfields today, pray that I make it out alive! On the other hand, maybe you should be praying for the other shoppers who might feel the full force of grumpy pregnant woman trying to get xmas shopping finished

Sex in hospital

last time round we did it around 4/5wks it was not the best experience of my life but I think its more of a psychological thing rather than being in pain from the stiches. I have no idea though if you have had a c-sec. Am sure DP will be pleased to get back on track afterwards I am like a nun at the mo no appetite atall for it and we were rampant with DS right up until he was born. Am afraid a bed is for attempting to sleep in these days.

LadyT am very very at you going to the Fat Duck both DP and I would love to go there. Think Heston is a genius.

Now on terms of pregnancy ailments I too have now become a big swollen blob. And horror of horrors have aquired stretch marks! Would really like the bubba to come out soon am 36+6 today and really dont feel like there is much left in me to go another 4-5wks.

Kimberely I feel your pain DP and I used to suffer from kidney stones it was how we bonded when we met in our drunken state discussing pain meds for kidney stones romantic eh.

Also v [envy of those who went out last night we are so skint right now that our exciting night life consisted of Strictly come dancing and Match of the Day.

Traceface that is v interesting re the cord as when I went for a tour of the birthing unit the midwifes there are very happy to let the cord finish pulsating before cutting.

Catdean regarding your birth plan it is a good idea to write down what you would like to expect from your labour and birth and encourage the midwifes to read it so that they are aware of your wishes. Just be very open to it being a guidence to the birth you would like and that it wont necessarily follow that plan.

Well done everyone who has finished their Christmas shopping we just have to buy for my parents and the outlaws and we are done. Am aiming to get everything wrapped this wk and post off the ones that need it.

Right off to put a super grumpy DS down for his nap so I can crack on making beef stew and dumplings mmmmmmm.

Morning everyone

Kimberley youch you poor thing, kidney stones are meant to be about the most painful thing there is so if you can survive that, childbirth will be a breeze!

PD keeping you and your family in my prayers, hope you're all getting the support you need.

LT I know what you mean about getting symptoms at the last minute - my feet and ankles are all swollen and my hands hurt, I had to get DH to cut me a slice of bread yesterday as holding the knife was too sore But we can count down the days til we'll all be back to normal again!

rosmerta/veggie - my hb birth plan has just got a section on the end about what happens if we decide/need to go into hospital - eg I would like to have any interventions explained clearly so DH and I can make decisions together. Seeing the MW tomorrow so I'll see what she thinks. Will probably laugh at the bit that says "I am planning to use water, massage and breathing for pain relief"...!

As I write have my feet resting on the birth pool that's inflated in the corner of the room doesn't seem to be leaking any air since we inflated it last night, so will give it a trial run tonight with water. Have gone for the Bassine, it's really not all that huge fortunately so fits quite neatly into the corner.

Quick bit of advice for anyone else who's got a teeny tiny bedroom. We put the bedside cot in on Friday, but to be able to have me on the same side as it and still be able to open the door, DH and I had to swap sides of the bed. Cue night of almost no sleep - we kept kneeing each other and sticking elbows in each others faces! Ended up turning the bed through 90 degrees and we're back on the right sides - so actually got some sleep last night [phew icon] So if you need to swap sides or do any other bedroom rearranging, give it a try now rather than when the nipper's here!

Oh and sex after birth - I know a lady with a very demanding (not very D)H who wanted sex in teh hospital, she said no so he insisted on a BJ instead. And then gave her a 'new baby' gift of an electric pelvic floor stimulator "to get everything back in shape". Nobber.

Sex in hospital! Not sure whether to be amazed, appalled or envious! Blimey. I couldn't even countenance it last time after six weeks, but then I was a bit of a physical wreck down there to say the least! Took me a lonnnnnng time to even think about it.

Can't believe I've only got just over a week to go! Suddenly feel HUGE and have just got a nice band of new stretch marks all round my tummy. This is exactly what happened with DD too - nothing all pregnancy then in the final weeks - bam! I don't mind though. I've never been a bikini/crop top person anyway.

Off out this afternoon to have a family photo taken. We didn't do it last time and I really regretted it. If they come out ok we'll go back there in a few months and have some more done with the baby .

Really envious of people on here going to see Bill Bailey (top choice - saw him loads in the Fringe when I lived in Edinburgh) and also going to the Fat Duck (that's our plan for our tenth wedding anniversary but that's not for a couple of years yet!). I had tickets to see Bill Bailey earlier this pregnancy but was so nauseous and tired I ended up selling them to a colleague at work. He. Had. A. Fab. Time.

So - any tips on final things to do pre-baby? (that don't involve much walking waddling?)

JJ crossed posts. Am at that bloke (though he would probably see that as an invitation). Good grief!

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Didn't mean to freak everyone out about the whole girl having sex in hospital story. She is actually only an acquaintance, not someone I know well - you see, I don't know anyone who has had a cs WELL, hence all the questions. She was I think trying to be reassuring about recovery, but telling me she had sex in hospital on DAY 2 has freaked me out a bit tbh. I can't see myself feeling in the mood. I shall feel glad if I can get in the shower and potter slowly around the bed. But what I was really wondering about was a few weeks down the line, and not necessarily full blown sex but other stuff. An orgasm after your uterus has been cut open really does sound quite foul, to me...and having read in that book yesterday specifically that sex after a cs is not a good idea for 6 weeks, I don't want to do the wrong thing (not that either of us will be chomping at the bit after major abdominal surgery, I am sure!)

Rosmerta, I am sorry you didn't get to the Bond film. As I said, it's quite hard to follow but DC is undeniably hot.

Beans - I guess you mean 37 weeks! How is your MIL? No one measures my bump at the hospital at last time I did it, it corresponded to the amount of weeks I was. Well, now it says 41cm and I am 38 weeks. They say LadyBaby is only going to be 7lb at birth but I wonder whether she will be bigger.

Jam - the Fat Duck is a special 40th birthday treat/last hurrah. I've been before and DP hasn't. And then it is financial cutbacks all the way, for us, for the forseeable (well, us and the rest of Britain, but as you all know well, this baby lark doesn't half put a strain on the pursestrings).

DaisyDora, I too have dodgy leg veins. Depressing. But As I wear support stockings every waking hour aparrt from when I am in the bath, I don't see them so it's a case of out of sight, out of mind...I am going to get them zapped as soon as I can. I don't want to wear opaques for the rest of my natural life.

Speaking of other appearance related issues, are my nipples ever going to go back to how they looked before? They're not, are they

JJ - glad it's not just me with the crap hands. Let's hope it goes away soon after the babies - my obs seemed to think it would hang around for a few weeks after...

Verso - enjoy your photo sesh. As for things you can do sitting down...write Christmas cards? I am trying to be super organised...

i'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooo tired, is there anyone on this thread who feels awake? I am def not nesting anymore it is all i can do to keep upright on the couch. Movie was good last night but found sitting in the movie theatre seat really uncomfortable. Also thought cheesecake for a little dessert would be nice at the cinema bar but as usual my body decided to rail against it and i was up with heartburn all night.

Sex post baby i have to say we did it a grand total of about 3 times in 9months after ds, after being right up for it during pregnancy my libido plummeted straight after. Poor DH he was quite good about it but was difficult at first because he took it that i actually didnt find him attractive anymore, we ended up being very open and talking about it and it was all ok but can put a strain on things. The upside for me was that he figured the more sleep i got the more likely he was to get some so he took the lion share of night time settling for DS and well i guess it eventually paid off for him. bless.

LT- i used to have little nipples and was very concerned about what they would be like post birth, they never went back to the way they were but somehow afterwards it didnt bother me so much. They did go back to being the same colour though.

Rosmerta- that sounds like a good idea about cutting the cord. Is it for personal interest or research for your course?

Oh dear - a few days away from this thread and I am totally lost. I am also so incredibly tired that a full personals list is beyond me. Sorry!

Let me just say to PD that I am so sorry about your brother and dad, what a time for you to have to deal with news like that. Also big hugs for Kimberley because kidney stones sound awful.

It seems we are all at the end of our patience with the physical side of pregnancy. I am 36+4 and this time next week I am starting a full scale campaign to kick start labour. I have already told DH there will be lots of sex (he is v excited, I lost all appetite about 6 weeks ago) and lots of curries (again DH is over the moon). I have evening primrose capsules to take orally and insert elsewhere . I have an acupuncture session booked for a week on Monday and I will be abandoning the sofa for hours sat on my birthing ball. I suspect I will still be here in 5 weeks but I need this baby out sooner rather than later. I am soooooo tired and my digestive system has given up!

I hope everyone is having good weekends. We took DD to the Natural History Museum yesterday which she loves. I also finished my christmas shopping. Today I have done nothing. DH is baking his first ever cake (for his office rather than for me , except not because I just witnessed his attempts at egg seperation and I now have no desire to sample the final product ).

xx

Evening,
well went to my BF class and now seem to be more confused / nervous about it than ever - sounds complicated! They discussed the colostrum quite a bit and that at my hospital they want us to manually express it into a syringe and then the hospital staff give it to baby? Is this normal precedure? Admitedly I glazed over a couple of times, especailly when the very bad early 80's Australian videos with the Kath and kim resemblance were shown, so perhaps I missed parts, but I still left feeling like it was quite complicated to get the latching on thing right Mum said she had issues too, but thankfully she'll be here and although can't do it for me, I guess will help get it right! One part I was wide awake for, was the bit about the fact of very fast weight loss in most cases (provided we don't eat like crazy but rather the calories we would pre-preg, and also that if we want a drink - red wine is the best option (in moderation of course) due to the iron - yay! Thant's my beverage of choice!!
Anyway, on a different issue - I was wondering re: baby clothes, how many / much pieces of each do I really need to get us up and running? I've got newborn and 0-3mth stuff. I'm guessing they mostly live in sleepsuits and bodysuits etc, but i'm a bit clueless as to how much I should get? I do have a tumble drier and tend to wash a lot...??
LT jealous of Fat Duck too -- DH has talked about it before and about going when we lived out in Henley, but I've never been.... One day!

gosh my spelling / typing is awful!! - apologies! 'm super tired...

KMP - sometimes I think those classes over-egg the difficulties of breastfeeding. I never quite understand why it is thought helpful to set everyone up to expect failure.

I was lucky because my DD took to breastfeeding like a duck to water. No problems at all. All I needed to know was that just before latching you place the nipple by the baby's nose - for DD that is all it took. She just latched on. I had a great cream called Lanisohl for the sore nipples for a couple of days and then I never felt sore again.

I am at the colostrum in a syringe idea. My hospital never mentioned such a thing. If you can establish a good latch early on then I cannot imagine why you would need to express. I found expressing painful and a faff, I think I would have been quite put-off if that was my first exposure to breastfeeding.

If you want to BF and do find it difficult then I think MN is an amazing resource. Some of the women of the BF boards are amazing BF coaches .

Thanks! I do remember them mentioning that nipple / nose thing so baby latches at the underneath end or something... yeah the colostrum expressing thing was wierd to me too - they said something about needing to make sure all the colostrum gets out and to baby as the milk starts being produced only after this all gets out, and some inexperienced mums have had probs making milk due to this? Yes - everyone here has been invaluable to me!! Thanks oh and I asked effie a while back about that email list / address that I missed - I have only an email which is name, and I wondered if wnyone else has given out their email address if that is the case? Am I just being paranoid? Maybe I'll feel better after Wed if I get to meet a few of you!

oooh, have received my secret stork - thank you SO much whoever it was.

pd - i am so sorry

kimberley ouch! poor you.

had b/f workshop on fri and nct antenatal classes this weekend - really enjoyed them both (although remembered loads more from nct than breastfeeding).

sorry to all those feeling rubbish.

my burn is much better, but now complimented by a blood blister from gardening, and i am continually dropping things - is that relaxin or am i just rubbish?

35 weeks today - can't quite believe some people will have babies by the end of the week. i think i will need the next 5 weeks to get used to it. still enjoying pregnancy and not quite ready for it to turn into motherhood yet.

kmp my email is just my name - if that helps.

With veggie on the tiredness. Keep thinking I should be nesting but can't be bothered to do anything.

Expressing colostrum sounds a bit mad to me too....is really hard to express at the beginning. Also I wouldn't worry too much about how much you eat whilst BF - especially at the beginning. I was absolutely starving and ate like a horse for first few months and still lost weight.

Err can't remember much else from what I've read. Apart from like everyone else am at sex after 2 days. Took me a while to contemplate it - and was v nervous first time we tried afterwards (I think about 4/5 weeks) mainly because I was worried it would feel different but then all fine. Like riding a bike. Ho ho.

Am hoping to come along on Weds to meet up - but will have DS with me. Hope that's ok.

Lady T am glad was not the only one to find Q of S a bit hard to follow. Was worried that brain had completely turned to mush given couldn't keep track of Bond film. DC was v good - although have to say when I saw him in RL was a disappointment. Bit gnome-like. Heresy I know...

KMP - try not to worry about the BF thing. I've not heard of having to express colostrum and give it via a syringe - doesn't sound very natural! If it's any encouragement my dd couldn't BF initially as we were both in ICU, but one I was in HDU I started expressing and freezing milk for when she was allowed it. It was eventually given to her, first via a feeding tube, then orally. So in the day she fed from my breast then overnight she had expressed milk from a bottle by the staff - and she adapted really well and didn't show any confusion between bottle and nipple - which I know concerns a lot of people. After discharge from hospital I only kept it up a few more weeks, mainly due to her enormous apetite and my inability to keep up...but I'm really excited about BFing again this time. I guess you just have to be open minded - everyone will have opinions on what you should and shouldn't be doing - and I discovered that on the whole motherhood is full of guilt whatever options you choose - so do what feels right for you and your baby! For me, changing to bottles was better for the whole family's mental health, which probably benefited dd more than the breast milk would have! sorry for waffling on there!
Have had a nice day with my sister and family - decided to go for Chinese all you can eat buffet for lunch (easy for silly Atkins-diet family members!!!) which went down very well all round - although I now feel like I won't need to eat for a week (but will in reality no doubt wake up at 2am starving!!!)
wg - am pleased your burn is getting better and am v. impressed that you're gardening still!

Oh, keeping up with the messages here is such a mission!

Hugs to all having a time of it with colds, poor sleeping and work stress.

I am now on mat leave - yay! - and getting very excited about all the nice things I want to do in the next few weeks. Its a weird feeling though not knowing exactly how long I have exactly to do these nice things.

I am so glad to see that others are getting into the Christmas baby stuff. I thought today that if baby has arrived and I am up and about I could even go and get a baby photo with santa!

How is everyone's Christmas prep going? Any tips for getting organised appreciated.

Beans33 - where did you find your maternity nurse? I may be too late to organise something now but the idea of some help in those early days sounds great.

CatDean - I loved the Ina May book - so many positive birth stories. It made me feel more confident about what women (and hopefully me!) are capable of during labour.

Have the first time mums been reading much about looking after babies? I have read Gina Ford and I liked the ideas but at the same time it stressed me out a little. I plan to try out bits of it and not get stressed if none of it works like the book.

Does anyone have any suggestions for books on breastfeeding? I have had some help from NCT class and know that there is a drop in centre around me so wondering if I just see how I go or if preparation is needed?

Look forward to meeting some of you at the Clapham Junction meet up on Wed.

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Have overdone it today and now having quite strong BHs and period-type pains . Bit worried actually as I am still only part-way through sorting out the house! I'm not ready to have this baby yet! I think the baby has engaged as well, as it is really uncomfortable when I stand/walk around. Had a mini-meltdown earlier when I felt too awful to cook dinner. DH was an angel and has ordered pizza. Bless.

Photo session was great fun apart from my face looking like the moon/a potato/a space hopper. It is SO FAT! Managed to pick a few photos to get printed up but most of them with me in looked terrible . I'm not the most photogenic of individuals at the best of times, and I guess that's what you get for trying to have photos done the week before you give birth!

hey there all went to a friends house for takeaway thai which was yum but ate too much and now really uncomfortable. Veggiebaby is lying on the rightside and using my stomach to rest his feet on i think.

Kmp-that expressing colostrum thing has no basis i think it was Arti who said the nose to nipple thing and nice straight body and let them open their mouth then pop just plug them in. This giving via a syring seems bizarre and since half the point of those 1st few feeds is for bonding and uterus contraction i don't see how expressing can help that. If it were me i would refuse it, or at least ask to have a go at latching you can try within minutes of them being born if you want (after they stop crying). Just be relaxed and if its going to happen it will. Really it is down to good support post birth, a relaxed unhurried attitude and if you have a nice calm environment and your mum there it will help a lot. There is so much to learn about breastfeeding but you have plenty of time to read up on it, i am still learning stuff now in the course i'm doing, it is actually quite amazing but i wouldn't be too hung up on trying to learn it all now. Our mums generation didnt know all they do now and they probably managed it better than we did.

also i would read parenting books but just take with you what works for you. I'm into instinctive parenting, i.e. what i believe works for me and baby is what is right for me and baby. It is helpful to get tips and ideas but you will always do what is best for your baby. the best advice i can give is if you ever feel overwhelmed and feel you can't make a decision to help comfort your baby, hand it over to DH, your mum or someone for a few minutes take a step back to breathe and compose yourself (or have a shower) and you will often find that you hear what is wrong in their cry and you can respond to it. But basically you will do what is right for them.

My secret stork arrived - thank you so much stork, what lovely gifts, one for me and one for baby

waiting I am also forever dropping things and just generally being a proper butterfingers !

kimberely poor you, that sounds so painful.

penny I have a pile of baby books to read but 1 week into ML and I still haven't read any of them, I have started the Baby Whisperer but haven't got very far...

Verso I am also getting pains down below - like pressure right down low at the front, do you think that may mean my baby is engaging ?... and if it makes you feel any better my face has also become balloon-like in the last 2 weeks !

Beans I was starting to wonder if you had gone into labour....

h i hate the balloon face, i get such a shock when i look in the mirror, and see how puffy and jowly my face is, hate having photos taken at the moment as i look so overweight and like some frump women. not nice.

also down south is becoming concerning, i wasn't going to worry about getting any waxing done but i seem to have an ever expanding bikini line. I think it is scareing DH a little, i am fairly lucky as i am not too hairy down there but we are both worried this might be permanent. With DS my hair down there got longer (quite bizzare) but it did not cover a larger surface area. does anyone else have this???