due Dec 08-the one were we are so brain dead we can't think of a thread title.

[Veggiemummy]

hey there will this be the last one do you think

Oh no, please don't apologise - I so appreciate all support and loveliness on this website. You're all ace!

Glad baby is on the move again Beans. As others have said, no harm in getting checked out if you're concerned.

Re: visitors, yes to at least one week of total peace and quiet! We stipulated 2 weeks, but we're antisocial buggers . You really don;t want people around in teh early days, and you;d be surprised at how insensitive visitors are (or they seem so at the time). Insist on your right to stay in bed and tell people to go away!

Hi veggie and Penny
It's kind of long winded, but actually, I don't really have the problem of my parents and inlaws arguing over how much time with the baby etc, it's more the opposite. My MIL is always worried about being in the way if my parents are here from O/S so therefore she is pretty stand-off-ish, and my parents -well the problem is Mum is fine with domestic helping out with the baby and cooking stuff, but dad gets itchy feet very fast and I can always tell that he is not on the same page as Mum with all the baby / domestic stuff - understandable I know, but they want to come for a month, and problem is dad can't just jump in a car when he's here like he can when they visit my brother. No insurance as it is expensive with no UK license, and they have different interests (ie: mum can amuse herself for hours just cooking and spending time with us and the baby but dad will tear his hair out. Now don't get me wrong - he doesn't complain - per say, but I can always sense that he gets a very cabin fever-ish and it makes me stress. Couple of glasses of wine later, and we all get a bit biffy! last visit was Ok - however the problem still slightly arose as Dad wanted to go off to the Peaks district or narrow boating or something and mum wanted to hang with the DH and I who was nauseous and tired since just getting pregnant! Also difference was - big house in Devon in the country - this time - small flat in London, freezing weather and a crying baby - they are not city people at all. So.... originally they were coming over a day or 2 before the birth and staying until just after Xmas, but then during a phone call to my bro's house (where they are currently visiting) my bro pointed out what we both know will happen over here if Mum is running around after baby and helping me and we are all under such a small space. However - I thought if they flew in just for Xmas and stayed 7-10 days that it would solve everything as it would be Xmas and things would be happening and then a bit of sightseeing etc - all after I'd had a couple of weeks to get into a routine with just me and DH. So - they hated that idea as it is too short to get over jet lag etc (which i kind of understand) and then decided not to come at all after i suggested it in a not so nice way --- there were tears from me, and a few choice words to say the very least, and now they are saying they want to do that - but I know they don't really want to, but honestly I don't know if I should just say come when you first planned to, but know exactly how it will be - etc....
See - said it would be long winded and I'm probably not explaining myself very well -- difficult via typing!! Sorry for the me me me post.....

Oh dear kmp. Um, I would say having anyone around when you're about to give birth is tricky - I go even further into cavewoman mode and would not want people fussing about asking if I'm having contractions or whatever. So the second option sounds better. Or, could they come around your due date but stay somewhere else (like a hotel in a nice area but a good bit away) for a while (when are you due?) then come to you for Xmas? That way they get to see another bit of the UK and see the new baby. Edinburgh's nice and far and easy to get back to London by train

Or York. Week in York (about 2 hrs from London IIRC) then visiting you. They can pop down on the train for a brief visit when the baby arrives then head back up till you're feeling up to a longer visit. Easy to get to nice bits of countryside (if cold) and plenty of indoor stuff to do.

hi effie - yeah my MIL suggested they come in for the birth (it's a section so i know the date) and then going up north or something for a short stay and then back for Xmas - thin is Mum isn't keen - dad would go for it though, and they won't come seperately as they never do anything apart!

while i was writing that big post - forgot to say - very glad all is ok beans baby bean just relaxing!

maybe point out that they are a short journey away if you need them, but they get a 'proper' holiday as well? Can you lean on your dad to get your mum to agree?

Or find stuff your mum likes to do in whichever area you suggest? What is she into?

it also comes down to a money thing i think - Aussie $ doesn't go far over here.... and Mum would still rather be spending the time with us - maybe i'll suggest coming for the whole month as planned, but be prepared to spend money and have an itinery to show me first!!

If they are staying for a while, renting an apartment would be cheaper than hotels. Good luck with persuading them

yeah - i've thought of that - i think i will need to. hate to play travel agent (and they will say i don't have to) but they are in to camping (not convenient) and camping shows and gardening and DIY!!!Anyone got any DIY they need done!! ie: they're not into London stuff much! They will like a day or 2 in London as it's nice during Xmas, and they would like to see a show, but that'll be it. Might lean on the MIL to entertain them!

crossed post -- it'd be even worse having an hotel - that's not the problem - not a problem staying here - just a problem that they will get bored - if they are in a hotel they will get bored AND be broke!! I think it will all work out, as they know now that It will be how it will be and so if they still want to come for the entire month and they know that we won't be touring the country, then it's up to them to stay that long - but if they get itchy feet, I might jsut send them over to the MIL's house in kent - where there is REALLY nothing to do!

D'you mean an itinerary for stuff to do from London? Lots of day trips possible (and stuff in London like some of the National Trust properties). If you need ideas there's a few of us Londoners who could help

yeah - stuff to do in London - local -- My H grew up here but he's not the best trip planner in the world!

whereabouts in London are you? Will have a think.

AT least from London you have loads of trains places. They could even get train up to the peak district or something for a couple of days, it is lovely up there that time of year!!
If they like camping then maybe they wouldn't minding staying in a hostel or something to save money?

Day trip to Cambridge would be nice too!
Or out to the North Downs, if they like walking/being outdoors. They are from Australia though, right? I guess they might not like the cold weather for walking etc.

Kmp just caught up! My first thought is Kew Gardens, especially if they like gardening, and easy to get to on public transport. Costs about £13 per adult & they have cafes/restaurants there so would be a full day!

oh KMP you poor thing. what makes this worse is with having a CS you are gonna need some serious recovery time. I think your Dad is going to have to just bring a book and sort himself out. As has been said there are actually loads of brilliant things to do in London, including some great walks. There are a few books out on walks around London inc. the canals, the river, well just loads. Also if he wants to do the long boat thing these can be done from London though a bit cold that time of year, i'm pretty sure there are companies based in Limehouse basin that rent out boats.

Also i'm sure you could rent a car for them, they can use their Australian license as long as they have been here less than a year (ie non resident) or they can easily pick up an international license in Australia before they come.

SL nice to hear peak district is nice that time of year as it's my first year having a non london christmas i was wondering what my local area would be like. Looking forward to taking mum for some drives up into the Peak district including back up to Castleton.

Thanks everyone - all good suggestions - I think I will do a bit of research - I think they have mentioned Kew Gardens before - Summer you agve me an idea - dad has some distant relatives in Cambridge!! they rang them one other time when they were here - I will insist they visit them this time! Thanks for all your suggestions! Effie - I'm near Wimbledon....

Lol - Veggie wanna take my parents up there!!

Veggie I went to Castleton one weekend in Dec last year, it was a really really cold but clear weekend. Castleton had this lovely christmassy atmosphere, with lots of lights up and stuff, and it was really busy! I thought it would be really quiet (it was around the middle of Dec, not Christmas itsef)

It was freezing though, I went mountain biking and some of the trails were sheet ice, totally lethal!

Hello everyone,

olipop Well done holding the spider! I scream for DH when I see one of the buggers

rosmerta That must have been a shock. Have you thought about getting a cat?! It is a tad cruel though , they certainly don't count as humane pest control.

kmp What a tricky situation. I know exactly what you mean about your Dad, mine is exactly the same. He gets itchy feet just when coming for an afternoon. He likes to be 'doing'. It sounds like a really good idea of effie's to get them to spend a couple of weeks or even a weekend visiting a different part of the UK. Self catering is usually cheap in January (after new year) and you could get them train tickets well in advance to keep costs down.

I'm rather concerned that it is going to be hard to say no to seeing people especially as it is going to be Christmas. I love the idea of having a couple of weeks of it just being the three of us though.

beans Glad babybeans got moving!

Kmp - in some ways London is easier for visitors who don't drive as they are not completely trapped in the house. Its not so bad to send them off on the tube or even for a walk in the area...IME much worse e.g. when have visited and been really reliant on hosts to get me out and about. As others have said, lots that can be done in London, including for those with outdoor tastes and without necessarily spending much e.g. heath, canals, parks, even in winter.

veggie - peaks are fabulous at Xmas! Have often been at the in laws around that time of year and have had some great snowy walks...

hehehehe they could entertain my mum kmp. I have to say my MIL is brilliant when she comes all she is an artist and just takes herself off with her paints and book and does some painting. When we lived in london she used to get up at 5am and wander down to St katherine docks. Then she would cook for us potter about then go to bed at about 8pm. the perfect parent. The only problem is she is also a singer and would spontaneously burts into song in public places, which as you can imagine is not teh thing to do in London.

Poor DH though he is a bit sad at the mo the reason he is back in Australia is to see his father. His parents are divorced and his father is a devout buddhist. he believes he is going to die soon and wants to relinquish all worldly ties, inc family. he doesn't want to know about our new babies birth etc as he doesn't want to be complicated by it as it might inhibit his transcendence at death.This is why DH went over as he wanted to see him one last time. They haven't always gotten on very well and it has been difficult. he met with him yesterday and his dad basically told him not to call or write anymore. Understandably DH is very upset but has to respect his father wishes. my poor DH will have to spoil him a bit when he comes home. Worst of all he is really missing DS & I and would rather have spent his 2 week holiday time with us or added it to his paternity leave. but i think it was for the best really he has now said his goodbyes and has also had some time with his mum. Not to mention some lovely weather.