Due in June 10! Longer than the Lord of the Rings!

[katzguk]

new thread 604 posts is far too many for one little thread, time to start again!!

Oh Uwila, few things get me as angry as a man who talks about how easy childbirth is. My Dh has been heard muttering something similar...only once though. This comes from the man who complained about the agony of constipation telling me I didn't know what it was like - so pushing a 7lb baby out of small hole isn't similar?

Sometimes I think he just says stuff like that to wind me up, but the problem is I do tend to have a sense of humour bypass when it comes to this sort of thing.

hey y'all

been off the thread for a bit 'cos working. I'm making no attempt to catch up with all but the v latest as at work....!

Uwila - how about stop managing for a while and letting all go to rack and ruin? or being more assertive about your needs? ie just simple stuff- the shopping needs doing, here's the list etc. Seems to me whilst you manage everyone will just carry on doing nothing for you until you collapse

I only say this cos with no 1 I tried to do everything (housework etc etc) and hated having to do all the trips to see family that were awkward, time consuming and all round pain in the ass. After about a year, I started 'putting my foot down' and asserted myself on a few things ie christening at our house instead of an 8 hour trip away the day before flying to NY......getting family to come and stay with us for defined periods. Now I unashamedly write list for FIL to fix stuff in house. Maybe worth a go if only to see the shock on their faces ;)

My Dh does 'tease' every now and then about the 'toothache' = childbirth but a stern look and the warning that giving birth to one and now two (impending) children means I have the right to end all disagreements with....'and I gave birth to TWO'. The end!

reading back this makes little sense - please forgive as sneaking a post whilst working under tight deadline - oo er.

Morning!

Been co-ordinating plasterer and plumber today and get dp off to work with the dog so haven't had chance to log on til now. Hope you're all well!

Jonah - happy birthday for yesterday!!!

KVG - I've not actually looked at the slings yet - I've got this thing about my baby being flat for some reason, and I imagine that by the time he wants to sit up a bit, he'll be too heavy for me to carry around. I guess I should have a look though as I'm sure one will be very handy now and then, especially for dp. I saw an article years ago about an entirely cloth one that wraps around and ties, it's a bit hippy, but it was did very well in tests, so I'd probably try to find that one...Definitely agree with the babe-magnet potential . Good look with your appt tomorrow. How annoying for you with your in-laws. Can't you at least make them cook for themselves and you? My inlaws never expect me to cook - they just assume I'm far too "boho" (ok, weird) to be capable of doing anything so conventional. So that's handy . What a shame your dh has the blinkers on with them. I feel lucky that my dp gets annoyed at the same things I do so we can enjoy a good slating session in private after they've irritated us

MrsW - glad all's well after your appt.

Hi MrsF - oh no! will I have to play Spiderman and stuff at 7am too with my ds??

Pink - We're supposed to be getting Pod Catholicised too. Only to keep dp's parents happy though. I'm so not religious. I agreed to it when I very first discovered I was pg because I just don't give a sh*t and because sp's mum is mortally ill (she's deeply religious). It is starting to really bug me though now for some reason. If I was going to indoctrinate him into anything, it would Humanitarianism which makes much more sense to me. I think I'll just let dp and his parents sort it out and stay out of it. Which fund are you applying to? Is it for Steiner school?

Coop/Trib - I generally really like my in-laws, it's just lately they've started to irritate us. I think it's us being protective of the bump. Compared to them we live in a rather unconventional way, and they just can't seem to get a handle on it. Luckily we live 2 hours down the M40 from them . Hope your day lasts a bit longer than yesterday!

I like the way you have your in laws trained Coop!

Uwila - poor you having to endure a long journey to Birmingham after just one week! Why on earth couldn't they come to you?? Mine have never visited us either, but tbh it's easier to take your leave than hint at others to leave if you've had enough I suppose. I'd like to think you're going to know what you need/want this time round and how to get it a lot more?

Hi Redhead! Can you have a christening done in your own house then? A catholic one?

Anyone here had/heard of a "walking epidural"?

Hello everybody!

Happy belated birthday Jonah! It sounds like you had a great day!

Thanks for all your good wishes. Test wasn't too bad! There was a lovely group of chatty ladies doing it at the same time and I'll I remember now is having many good laughs!

How did it go for you Teabelly?

I know this sounds wacko, but I am kind of wishing I do have diabetes, because then there will an explanation for the high fluids. Also, high fluids due to diabetes tend to have a good outcome. However, I haven't had any sugar in my waters, so I guess it is unlikely.

In the good news side, baby is head down for a change (He has been mostly lying transverse), and uteruous remain about the same size, so fluids must be at least stable....

Charley, I have.

Welshie, thanks for passing on news from SH. Is good to hear that she is ready to try again. I'm keeping my fingers croosed for you SH!!!

Sorry, very informative post that wasn't it Have you put up a seperate thread about it about or asked your mw?

As I understand it, it is literally that; an epidural that allows you to have control of your legs (hurrah!) and walk around. I don't know details about it i.e. do you have to be attached to one of those hanging drip things etc.

Your mw will obviously know if it is available to you at your hospital.

I'd start a thread here to get some good information and feedback.

Playing spider man at 7am? !!! I was just reading about boys enjoying to play putiing on pink frilly dresses.... Can I have one of those, please?

You are a good mum MrsF!

About slings.... I am confused.... I usually think about the baby bjorn as a carrier, where baby is upright. Aren't sling only theones that they lay in it? I used both styles and DD preferred the carrier type thing. The sling comes in handy though to nurse and move around. BTW, I have an extra sling if anyone would like one!

I tell ya what, I am seriously struggling to keep up with what everyone is talking about these days.

I know I forgot to say happy birthday Jonah Hope you had a lovely time!

As for parents and in-laws, I have a fairly cruise-y time. I get on well with my folks and fortunately they are very active. So, if and when they come and stay to help when baby is born, I know I can boss them about, send them to Sainsbury's, get mum to do the washing Dad to iron, give them DIY jobs, bliss! My MIL is local so that solves the problem of her never having to come and stay

Uwila, I agree with Red. If your in-laws aren't coming down to see you, tough. Personally, I wouldn't traipse up there with a toddler and a new born, post-ceasarian. The only advantage I can see is that you get to dictate very easily how long you stay!

Glad your appt was good this time Lua

Ummm what else have I missed...?

I think this stupid loft convesion thatseems to be taking forever to complete, is just beginning to piss me off. Maybe that's why I feel like I can never catch up on here.

BTW didn't someone suggest a very informal book group on here? I'd be into it, I need to do less tv watching, less MN-ing and more reading.

Uwila - I am surprised by you being bullied into a car journey to Birmingham one week after a section! I think that is an example of how tired you must have been. Put your foot down this time!! I hope your Mum will be able to visit. I think you are incredible taking on everything you do and you should tell your DH so!!! Men can be on another planet sometimes can't they. My DH isn't at all worried about this birth and thinks that I am not either as last time was so 'easy' Boy has he got a shock coming. I think the birth amnesia thing has affected him more than me. He does seem to take pride in telling people how well it went last time. I just hope they realise that is did hurt you know!!! Men [raising eyebrows smiley]. They are another breed entirely sometimes.

We're going to get both children christened too, C of E, sometime in September I hope. The new baby will wear my old Christening gown

Oh, also, there are slings rather like hammocks where the baby lies flatter than in BBjorns, Wilkinets etc if that is important to you. ANy good greeny catalogue should have some. In fact I think Pink was looking at getting one...?

Lippy - Love your first reply to the walking epi question. Lol

Yeah I know Coop I just wanted to let her know that I had, I wasn't sure if I had time to write much more at the time. Plus, I think she's asked that question before and obviously didn't get an answer!

What kind of sling Lua? I am tempted to get a 'sling' hammock style carrier this time purely for our flights in July as I think this will be more comfortable for a tiny baby and me than the Wilkinet to begin with. What do you think? Plus the baby will be a bit less 'attached' too me and it is hot here in the summer so that will be better too.

Lippy , I am still giggling now.

The extra sling I have is a hammock style, organic cotton and all! I got two as present for my DD and kept one at home and one at work. The hammock came in handy as I said when feeding, and also when she was older. By then she could sit in my hips, but the hammock help distribute her weight. Was great for plane travels. I am actually keeping the one that got most use, because it is softer. So the one I want to find a good home for was used very few times. Let me know if you are ineterested. Is free for a good home!

I just can't keep up with who said what so gonna go by subject now...

walking epidural- as far as I know a partial epidural, so you get some pain relief but can -yep- walk around

christening - sorry last post totally misleading. The christening was in a church, big party at home. I'm not too keen on the whole religious thing, but both families were, have to confess I caved on that and went for winning the location argument instead. Not sure what to do this time around. My friend had a lovely naming ceremony at her house which I personally would prefer, but Dh not keen and in- law family would just see as too left field. Will see what happens as I'll leave it for a year before I do anything.

slings - we had a baby bjorn last time which was OK but I wouldn't rave about. I felt she was in a too scrunched position when she was v young. My friend is giving me her sling that ties around the back and is just soft material. She says it was the best thing she had. Will see!

family - well mine don't do anything for me but my in-laws have been v good. I've found it hard to ask them to do stuff, but have had to come to terms with it. After all they shouldn't offer if they don't want to do it! So I try to ask now. Hope MIL will come up when No 2 arrives. And I'll book a cleaner!

I am def interested but would give you some money for it. And also if there is someone who doesn't have a carrier at all and wants one (Pink, Trib, KVG??) then they should have it before me. Hope this makes sense.

Hmmmmmmmmm Now I am thinking a hammock style sling might be nice, they look very easy to use. I didn't buy either of my previous two, they were given to me, so I think I can afford to splash out. Have any brands been recommended?

I think Pink has got a Hugabub, I seem to remember following a link someone had posted about it. I might get one of those as they look pretty good for breastfeeding. (Although I must say it seems like a shedload of cash for what is basically just the same as the big bit of material Mexican women have used for generations.

I think Uwila's a bit buggered on the 'just leave the housework til he does it strategy' as her dh isn't there four days a week. I think he would quickly figure out that all he had to do was endure the chaos til Monday and then he could disappear again. Men may appear to inhabit another planet but they are not too shabby in the field of finding excuses to avoid housework, let's be honest!

As to the having to go visiting after a caesarean, I'd be tempted to take advantage of dh's absence, phone the MIL and apologise in advance that you won't be able to visit this time.

Uwila. Repeat after me. 'No I will not go to Birmingham, I have just given birth, I also have a toddler. No I will not go to Birmingham etc'
Can't believe you did that - you must have been in some sort of fug.
Ah yes parents in law....mine are coming over from NZ for 4 months! They are staying with SIL around the corner (good), FIL is a dear who does every job going in the house, MIL less so, kind of passive agressive, a bit disapproving in an understated way so you can never have a proper row with her. Have decided to be more 'myself' this time around, no more pretending to be something I'm not (well that's the plan)

Oh, I'm afraid I misled you guys. When I said we would be expected to go to them, I did not mean to imply that I was going to. A few months ago I mentioned to DH that when someone has a baby, it is proper for other people to go visit them, not the other way around. Hmmmm... he probably needs a reminder.