Due June 08 - Creme egg season is over, summer is now here, so time to tidy the ladygarden before the big day

[bitofadramaqueen]

I wonder how quickly we'll get through this thread?!?!?!?!

dramaqueen, I've also heard that you are either pre-disposed to stretch marks or not but as I said I got loads when I put on weight 10 years ago and none now. Of course, that will partly be because my skin had already been stretched so had more 'growing room', but I also cover myself head to toe in baby oil after I shower (when skin is still wet) and then pat myself dry. It leaves my skin feeling really soft which is lovely. I started doing it about 5 weeks ago when my tummy was getting very tight and uncomfortable and it's really helped.

Just come back from my 2nd Parentcraft class where we learned about bottle feeding - I am utterly bloody confused now! Think I will need a degree in science to get my head round what to do! Can I bf til splodge goes to school instead?!!

Please, one of you with kids tell me it's not as complicated as it looks!

Now we've got all this to worry about too: news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7384856.stm.

Totally confused . . . .

as for music, I'm a huge Meatloaf fan and think that Bat out of Hell will be v appropriate birthing material - do you think headbanging will aid the speed of birth or not?!!

Hi there

Loving all the music chat! Bat out of hell sounds great!

Had my appraisal - as expected, I got marked down because of 'exceptional circumstances leading you not to be as resilient as you normally would' - translation = 'because you were pregnant, you couldn't handle an enormous workload.' As expected, but have decided not to let it bother me.

Ooooh - must tell you what happened to me last week.

Had a dinner to celebrate my favourite client being acquired - all advisors plus client were there. Anyway, pre dinner, was sitting down having a drink before everyone arrived and struck up conversation with this lovely american lawyer. My client then turned up, to whom she turned and said 'Congratulations'. He looked rather puzzled because he didn't know what he was being congratulated for. Then she looked from me, the bump to him. You should have seen his face!!! I thought he was going to have a heart attack. I have just sent him a text asking how 'baby father' is! ha ha.

ucake - that's a bit rough - I can't believe they would say that... I am a bit too about whether they can say something like that. Isn't that discriminatory??

Glad the evil stretch marks haven't come back to bite you splodge .

upsidedowncake - sorry that your appraisal went as expected. Did they confirm that the 'exceptional circumstances' were pregnancy related? Wouldn't be a bad idea to try and pin them down to agreeing that's what they meant (particularly if you go on to get a lousy payrise next year as a result). Think you're absolutely right not to let it bother you just now though. Am just studying the linking of appraisals to pay and it's wrong-diddly-wrong in my opinion!

mellymell- your client is probably wondering if he's going to get hit for maintenance next .

right, need to get back to the books. This time tomorrow it'll be nearly over. Then I have to come home and deal with the world's biggest ironing pile . Have done soooooo much washing to take advantage of the excellent drying weather, I forgot I'd have to deal with it all afterwards .

Thanks Dramaqueen and Nettiehay. I will get a lower than usual payrise, but I usually get the top mark (used to be smug emoticon] so am still considered to have met my objectives, iyswim. 'Exceptional circumstances' were:

1. huge project
2. no account manager support
3. pregnancy

I thought it was possibly discriminatory but I don't want to have the argument, as it will only get me cross and stressed. But I did call a marketing agency who I have good relationships with - to start the ball rolling for new opportunities from Sep 09 ...

Sounds potentially discriminatory, but I think you mentioned that it would affect next year's payrise? In which case you can file it away till then. Completely dont blame you for wanting to avoid the stress just now. Anyway - next year, maybe new horizons...

oh yes, I completely understand not wanting to stress yourself out now - new year, new horizons, new baby...

... and to be honest, my current employers are letting me off till Sep 09 through a combination of parental, special and maternity leave, so it's not worth having the argument now - just accepting that will have to think again next year.

And I've never had an appraisal sitting out in the sunshine before - that's got to be a bonus, no?

Definitely! Cant believe how nice the weather is when I have to stay indoors and study. (Too noisy outside unfortunately). Although if I wasn't studying I'd be at work so not much difference. Fingers crossed for a glorious summer when we're all on mat leave...

Hi all, been away over the weekend - great to see the new thread. It's all getting exciting!! I'll not comment on new things, but the breastfeeding - also really horrified about FIL seeing me do it. I might have been ok if he hadn't said - recently - that he doesn't mind and is used to seeing it. Now I'm horrified! My plan is to go upstairs and get time out. FIL is annoying and difficult anyway...

I'm struggling a bit, though, folks. I've not been happy all pregnancy, but suddenly at 34 weeks, I'm quite big, and it's really freaking me out. I'm normally small - size 8 - and haven't really gained weight all over, just on the bump, but it's become quite obvious. Not that I'm trying to hide it or anything, but it sort of makes me feel depressed. (Boobs - still horrific, esp nipples!). Am I a total freak? What can I do about it? DH is doing his best but gets annoyed that I'm tearful any time anyone says 'big bump there' etc. I know it's a baby, and I know it will go away (eventually...) but I feel miserable every time I see my bump.

I feel very old as I didn't recognise many songs on Paro's list

Upsidedown - you have the right attitude to the appraisal, it's another work thing out of the way now.

Splodgesmum - dh just told me about the bottle warning - will have to look into it.
Bottle feeding in my opinion is more complicated than breastfeeding, but when I returned to work after ds1 I did mixed feeding, as I couldn't seem to express enough so when I was at work he had formula and bmilk at home. It wasn't hugely complicated , just more time consuming, with counting out those scoops, washing bottles, teats etc...

My aim this time will be to establish baby on the breast, begin to express when feeding is established and try baby on a bottle(but which one???) earlier than I did with ds2 who never took one.

Hey, maybe there's something in the bottle chemical thing as ds1 is a bit hyper and ds2 completely different

I don't recognise them either

I'm struggling to cope with DD now I'm feeling so big and tired. She ran away from me this afternoon and got all the way down the road. Really scary.

HI Essie

Sorry you're feeling down, pregnancy can do that to you. Never being anything near to a size 8 since I was about 10 years old the size thing doesn't concern me but I can imagine how you must feel. You just look down at this big bump and wonder how you're going to be afterwards. You will have a baby belly, but as you started out at a size 8 I don't think it will be that bad.

I am pretty huge but being through it before I know that it does go and the slimmest I have been was when ds1 was about 1,I went to a wedding and got into a size 12 skirt - I was sooooo pleased. On the day of the wedding I discovered I was pregnant with ds2 - needless to say the skirt hasn't made it out of the wardrobe again!!

debinaustria, i think the NCT has advice about which bottles to use, but apparently the trend now is to go back to glass bottles and ditch plastic altogether. Bottle feeding at home looked complicated enough, but it was the logistics of feeding while out and about that just looked horrendous!

I'm now beginning to wish we'd bought a pram for twins - one side for the baby and the other for all the paraphernalia that we'll have to lug around!

Thank goodness it's not just me Rolf re Paros music!! You must have been so scared when dd ran, I remember similar things happening with ds1 when I was heavily pregnant with ds2. You could just do without it couldn't you?I Used to strap ds1 into a buggy for the smallest of walks!

Spoldge - are you intending to breastfeed or bottlefeed or are you just learning about both options?

Rolf - it's impossible to run after the little blighters isn't it. I have resorted to reins when we go for a wander, because without fail, DS heads for the road and whenever I call him, he determinedly heads in the opposite direction. I think he's having an independence moment and is especially keen to demonstrate it in front of his mother.

Hi Essie

Sorry that you're struggling with the pregnancy and body image issues. There are people who get back down to their original weight / shape - or less after they have given birth, and if you really want to, you will be one of them.

I think it's quite common to feel like this, and if your midwives are at all human, it might be worth mentioning your feelings to them.

Is the issue body image or more than that? One friend of mine originally felt it was body image but eventually decided it was about lack of control / the life change. If so, would you consider doing some reading or getting some kind of one-off counselling to help you manage it? There may be people on other Mumsnet threads who could give you some advice too.

And Rolf, Mellymel, shiver at little people running away from you. I still have DS (29 months) in a pram on the roads as I'm too scared of him running away.

debinaustria, I really really want to bf exclusively for the first few months if poss. Parentcraft this morning was supposed to be all about bf, but unfortunately the bf person was off sick so we just got a talk about bottle feeding.

However, they have given me details about a really good bf clinic round here, and I know the NCT have bf counsellors, and my hospital is really into bf, and my NCT coming up this week is going to be all about it so I shouldn't be too short of advice!

But we were told this morning that we should be prepared with bottles and sterilisers and everything in case bf doesn't work and we bring home a hungry baby from hospital. We were also advised that we should introduce a bottle for some feeds from 6 weeks onwards because if we were unavailable for any reason and someone else had to feed baby it would be a bit of a nightmare if they'd never fed from a bottle.

My head hurts just thinking about it all!

deb, forgot to ask, did you bf exclusively until you went back to work?

Splodge - I mixed BF and bottles from the start which worked for me. Meant I could give DS a good meal at the end of the day when my milk was perhaps not as great and DH could participate in the feeding. Each to his own.

Anyone found out which bottles are affected from this scare or is it all bottles. I'm damned if I'm carting round glass bottles - they'll weigh a ton and will get broken the whole time.

mellymell, this is the NCT link which tells you which bottles are affected and which are safe - you'll be surprised to learn that the NCT sells the bottles that are safe!

www.nct.org.uk/press-office/press-releases/view/81

Apparently the glass bottles don't break easily but I've no idea how heavy they are.

Thanks for the tips on mixing - it would be nice for dh to have some feeding time with splodge too so that would be good. It really is such a minefield!