Due in Dec 2007. Enough already, bring on the babies!

[suey2]

hellloooooo?

Morning All,

Had a good sleep last night, only woke once. What a difference that makes. And my temp isn't here for the next 3 days so that is bliss too. She's really hard work. She used to work here 10 or so years ago and has a bit of a reputation for being an attention seeker.

Hospital check up this afternoon so can bugger off home early and DH has the day off too because its half term for his course.

I guess it's not long to go now but I'm trying not to wish the time away. I have moments of being scared but most of the time I try to be in a zen like state and let it all wash over me. I want to enjoy this time before the boy comes along and be rested in preparation. My mum said last night that she couldn't wait for me to experience just how wonderful it is to have a child. I'm kind of blank at the moment, no expectations and taking everything as it comes - but I think in a good way.

Shall I change my name for halloween? The emoticons have changed. I could be Blackcatswizzskas - can anyone do any better than that?

Oh dear MM - have you got anything to change into?

love the halloween name wisska, you should go with that

mixedmama - that sounds like the kind of thing I do... do you have another top?

Nope no other tops, am now eating chicken curry as well.. sure i will spill that too.

Morning

I know we've done this before but can you remind me if anyone here is going to have a young child at home full time when newborn arrives?
I'm having 2nd thoughts about keeping DD at the childminder for 3 mornings a wk. Financially we could really do with the money but I don't want to feel I can't cope looking after newborn (those inital early weeks of sleep deprivation etc) whilst looking after a 22month old.

MM - poor soul spilling the milkshake down you, I am sure these bumps act like a magnet to things though, often I take a top off and discover I have spilt something down it (just a small dribble of tea or something).

Buzzy, hope you get a good nights sleep

Anyone got any good ideas for a costume for DD? Tomorrow it's Halloween fancy dress party at the toddler group and all the costumes I can see in the shops are of witches - she's too young to go as a witch!!

hello loucee - ds will be 19 mo when lo is born and I'm planning 2 days a week with childminder as I'm not sure how I'll cope, she also has a waiting list and I'm keen to keep the place as she's fab and lives across the road (as even offered to have ds overnight if we need whilst I'm in labour) we've been planning this in to our budget but its a hard decision

for halloween costume - black cat? I always used to be one, v cheap to do, make a tail to pin on, black trousers and top or a bin bag with a hole cut in top (my mums favourite!) and a mask or face paint, maybe a head band with ears on. I loved it, only now can I see how truely rubbish the costumes were - once at primary I had to go in fancy dress for a 'china' day, I had visions of being a chinese girl with my hair in plats and hair coloured black - ended up wearing a bin bag (did I meantion that was the basis of all our costumes!?!) with chinese food labels on it, wok on my head and chop sticks in my hair - my mum sent me as a 'chinese takeaway' I won a prize but think it might have been out of sympathy!

Insy - I was going to say black cat too. You just got in before me.

You could make a tail out of an old pair of tights and face paint some whiskers on her.

Good afternoon.
Loucee - I will have a 2.3 year old child at home with me but we are going to keep her in the child-minders for two days a week. A) This will give me two days break from trying to cope with two; b) it will mean I will have some time alone with the baby (who otherwise would never get what dd has had for the past 2 years, eg my undivided attention; c)DD loves going to the childminders, it's very much part of her week and I would not want to interupt her routine and d) we probably wouldn't get the place back if we gave it up.
I am panicking like mad about the three days I will be on my own with the two of them, but I do have quite a good support network of friends around here at least.

Saw the midwife yesterday and she is sure the baby is head down, so that is one thing to stop worrying about (will find out for sure with the consultant next week). But I found the visit very perfunctory - she was totally uninterested in me and how I was feeling. We also have not discussed the birth at ALL yet - I know I am 2nd timer but as I did not go into labour last time and had an elective c/s it is as good as a first birth (with added complications). I know I have a few weeks to go but there is a real possibilty now that the baby could come before I see the m/w again. So I am feeling quite down and alone about it all at the moment. Hopefully will feel a bit more confident after seeing the consultant.

Insy - you made me laugh with the vision of you as a chinese takeaway!! Aww bless the mums, they did try their best eh!

Thanks for the cat suggestions, just had a call from another mum from toddlers - the party is next fri not tomorrow so I've got a bit longer to make something now!

I ma worried that DS is not in any kind of childcare as it means he will be with me all of the time.

MM - who looks after him at the moment? Can they continue to help out? My biggest fret at the moment is that DH may have to go off on a residential course for four weeks in Feb, so will have a 2-year-old and 8ish week old baby to look after on my own, day and night. My parents will help out when they can (I don't have any in-laws on the other side, apart from a brother in-law who lives in Florida, and my brothers and their wives have small children of their own and/or live too far away) but it will be extremely helpful to at least have two days a week when DD will be happy and safe in childcare.

With apologies to Buzzybee and Neuro who will, I realise, be without partners from the start. I take my hat off to you!

Loucee - I was thinking the same thing, as our DD will be 2 yrs when LO arrives. We've decided to keep her in nursery, but for 3 mornings a week intially and when I'm ok with getting out and about with 2 children (can't believe I'm saying that!), I'll take her to some mother and toddler groups in my local area. I'll prob keep her in nursery 2 mornings afterwards anyhow to keep her place there (long waiting list!).

MM - are your parents / family close by? I don't think you need worry that your DS isn't in childcare, if DD continues at the CM it will only be for the first 6-8wks after birth as I'm planning to take the year maternity and cannot justify a years childcare costs just to keep a place (but that could be because I am doubtful I will return to my old job).

If I take DD out of childcare I plan to take her to her Jo Jingles class as usual on a Tuesday morning and take her to the shopping centre on a Thurs morning as she does now (there's an open ice rink there that she loves going to watch the skaters etc). Then hopefully I will be able to get FIL to watch the baby on a Mon morning so DD and I can carry on going to the Toddler swim group and on a Friday morning we will all go to the toddler group

Claraq,

I too have felt the same concern that my midwife visits are very perfunctory...urine, blood pressure, measure the uterus, any swelling?... and then writes in my notes. I had to ask her if she had the results of the bloods taken at 28 weeks at which point she said, oh yes your iron level has dropped. She doesn't ask how I feel and hasn't yet mentioned anything about what happens at the birth and this is my first, so all i know is from books, which frequently mention discussing things with your midwife.

I'm 3 weeks behind you (just checked the list) due on 20 Dec so was thinking positively that perhaps this bit is still to come, but I'm not convinced. I was put under shared care right at the start (don't even know why, no-one bothered to tell me, but think its my age, 38) and that makes it all the more confusing as I only have every other appointment with the midwife. At my 30 week hospital check I asked about using the birthing centre and the doc said you need to discuss it with your midwife. At my 32 week midwife check when I asked (as she's never discussed options)she said I needed to discuss it with the consultant and that if he thought it was ok she would do me a booking form. Which makes me think if I hadn't bothered to ask would I just turn up at the hospital in labour to be told you can't use the birthing centre as you didn't book it! It doesn't give me a great deal of confidence, so i guess i just need to be more pushy to get answers.

Poppy10 - yes, I know just how you feel. I am almost nervous of asking questions as they may get dismissed out of hand as over-anxious and too early. But I've only got 5 weeks until my due date now! I am also under shared care (and am 39 so hmmm, perhaps a pattern developing here) and have luckily found my doctor a lot more open. However, I have always felt that questions about the birth etc should be aimed at the midwife as she is supposedly the expert.
Have you managed to do any antental classes? I did NCT ones last time and found it helped at the time, but can't remember much about them now. I sort of wish I had signed up to a refresher course.
I fear that to the healthcare professionals we are just one of many; whereas to us this is such a massive thing you really do want all the reassurance you can get.

My parents will help out loads I know they will but it wouldve been nice for him to be in nursery for even one morning to be without "us" doing his own thing.

My MW appointments are rubbish as well. She listens to the heartbeat and then says "there" as if she only does it to satisfy me rather than actually check the baby.

At my last appointment she said

"are you BF or FF"
I said " hopefully BF"
She said nothing more and then wrote down

"breastfeeding discussed" in my notes.

I forgot my urine sample as they give us a pot right at the beginning when we book in and she didnt even have any spare ones so just didnt test my urine, I know I shouldnt have forgotten it, but still.

loucee - having a plan of the toddler things going on in the week is a good idea, I've planned the days ds is with CM around what else is available

mixedmama - mw did same thing about urine last app, I'm sure she used to send me to loo for a sample last time, I think you're right about the assumption that because its number 2 you know what you're doing

claraq and poppy - just ask the 'stupid' questions, I missed out on loads of classes and stuff last time because they weren't mentioned, it was really annoying - I also couldn't work out how to get child benefit after ds was born, asked mw and she said you've already been given a form in you bounty pack in hosp... errr no I was never given one, so I had to go to our tax office which was a right pain with a new born, if I'd known I've asked before I left hosp.

Can I join in the moan about MW?? Mine always look bored and speaks like she is reading out of a text book....

loucee - glad you liked my chinese fancy dress I still remember being embarassed at the time... note to self to be more creative for ds!

Talking about urine samples, anyone else finding it really hard now to aim into those little pots?

Claraq - yes it does get rather messy

I alway wee on my hand

someone advised me to do it into a jug and then pour in.

when i went to hospital to get checked out when i was having those pains they gave me a massive bowl, much better.

i have researched loads of activities for DS and am hoping to really plan our weeks so that I am not cooped up in the house with two young children.

Am feeling the effects of waking up at 3am now.....just want to sleep....

Am also going to be leaving DD at in-laws for a couple of afternoons a week - hopefuly to catch up on sleep.

Oh oh the due Nov mums are starting to drop in earnest now - we're next girls.