Due June 2020: thread 7. The one where babies appear

[AndddddHerewegoagain]

Hi everyone. Starting another thread!! Hoping we start having babies appear very soon!!

@Kez437 when I had my dd 3 years ago I was in postnatal ward for 3 days. I wheeled her little cot to the bathroom with me when I needed the loo. Showered when dh was there but obviously this time there won’t be visitors allowed. When a nurse saw me wheeling the little cot into the loo she said I could have just left her in my bay, but I really didn’t feel comfortable doing that!!!

Tbh if the other ladies in my little bay hadn’t all had visitors I might have asked one of them to keep an eye on her (although we all had our curtains closed anyway) but I’m sure you could ask staff to watch your baby while you shower. They must realise new mums are anxious about leaving their newborns, it felt so so impossible for me.

@MissisBee me too! I had a oremmy last time so delighted to be 37wks this week . Also, llove the dungarees :)

@Magpie21 I've had the same MW for all appts and, lovely as she is, it's been a pain. I had alot of questions and she wasn't able to give me proper answers. For example, when I asked about why certain things were advised her answer was 'because you're high risk' or 'because that's the recommendation' but she didn't give me any proper detail. In the end I emailed my consultant a list of questions and had a detailed chat with her. I would have liked the opportunity to see another MW to get a different viewpoint or second opinion if you like. She also has never asked about my birth.

I had my DC1 in Ireland where everyone sees a Dr - you see the MW for the basic antenatal checks and then go into the Doc for a once over. In labour it's the same as here in that it's MW care unless there's an issue. In my experience, both here and in Ireland, the Drs have been much more able to discuss the specific details and relative risks of different options and apply it to me as an individual. The community MWs seem to see things more generally. The hospital MWs I've seen this time have been super lovely too but still not a patch on the Docs in terms of detail (though I would say more than the community MWs). Maybe I'm just a data junkie but I haven't found continuity of care any more beneficial. I do feel terrible saying that as the MW is lovely

*premmy (not oremmy!)

Snack wise, I was allowed to eat during normal labour (boosted with a pessary), except I was too busy vomming up the anti-sickness medication to eat. I would've been allowed to eat whilst on the synotocin drip, but I was only having energy gels like I use for endurance stuff, then I had a useless epidural later on, just had it put in, hubs went to pass me a gel and was told I couldn't have that anymore now the epidural was in would've had it 10 mins earlier if I'd known!

Ended up having 24 hours with nothing to eat, in labour, with sepsis. If it wasn't for the few gels I kept down I think I would've flaked out. Definitely take snacks! If all goes naturally you have the option of them at least. I believe in America they don't let you have anything and plug you into a glucose drip?!?!

Oh and when I was in with daughter we had a couple of days with her staying with me on post-natal and being wheeled back to SCBU for obs. I'd been poorly too hence we were both still there. I found the midwives were really happy to keep an eye on her whilst I showered; it wasn't just one shower and waiting for hubs on one day, it was a daily thing. I even had the newborn hearing test nurse look after her at one point! I'm sure in the current climate they must be braced for that sort of issue since it will affect everyone, every day, for any duration of stay.

So I have perhaps a silly question but I’m curious as I’ve seen several mentions of a postnatal ward recently... in the U.K., if you have to stay overnight before or after birth are you in a typical hospital ward with several beds separated by curtains? My only reference for what it’s like is One Born Every Minute and they always seem to be in private rooms on that.

@UKtoSK I think it depends on the hospital and also whether you want to pay to have a private room. At my hospital, which had a whole rebuild of the women's and children's part a few years ago, everyone gets their own room post natally as a standard thing. They are all en suite too. I'm made up with this as it means they are letting partners stay after the birth for the whole time during Covid, as long as they don't leave the building then come back again. They are even providing camp beds for partners rather than the standard chairs as they know partners can't go home for a rest then come back. I had the choice between 2 hospitals where I am and I'm very glad I chose this one now!

Oh wow @APD1981 that is amazing!!! Great choice of hospital indeed.

Yes @UKtoSK at most UK hospitals the postnatal ward is a bay of four beds with curtains round, which is what mine was like last time (its a different hospital to the one I’m going to this time because I’ve moved, but I think this one is the same set up).

You can pay to stay in a private room with an en suite instead which is £200 per night at mine. But they can’t guarantee having one available. The hospital will give you one of these rooms for free if you have a medical reason to / sometimes even just if it’s been a difficult birth to help you recover.

What is it going to be like for you? Is it all private rooms?

@Magpiefeather I know. I feel very lucky in the current climate! They changed the set up of the wards between my sister's 2 births and she a vastly better experience the 2nd time round. Just things like not worrying about leaving the baby to shower or go to the loo was a big bonus. I believe the doors on the rooms are lockable so you can leave the bathroom door open when you shower and still see your baby etc. I've also found out that they will give my hubby breakfast but he needs to then provide his own food (didn't even expect breakfast as that's not normal outside of Covid times) but he can go the hospital restaurant and the shop for other meals. The restaurant does take outs, too, so he can bring food back to our room. I appreciate this really isn't the norm at the moment and I'm so grateful I happen to live where I do!x

@SerBrienneOfHouseTarth hooray for term babies!! The dungarees are the comfiest things I've ever worn, practically living in the at the minute.
I was lucky to get my own room for most of my 2 weeks in hospital last time - spent my first night in a 4-bedded bay. A woman came down from labour ward in the early hours with her newborn and I kept an eye on him when she went to the loo. DS was in SCBU for most of my stay, but we spent our last 24 hours together on the postnatal ward. I had an ensuite, so just wheeled him in there when I had a shower.

Oh wow @APD1981 that's amazing!

My hospital now is 4 bed bays and shared bathrooms outside of the bays so I definitely would need to be wheeling him in with me - I'm having a section so maybe I can use the wheelie cot like a Zimmer frame to walk? I'm assuming I'll be able to walk it's my first section who knows

I could request/pay for a private room if one is available but it's £850 a night

@APD1981 your hospital sounds amazing!

I was given a private room for free because I didn't have my daughter with me. They took me round, then realised there was a cot in the corner still, which sort of defeated the point of me not being reminded of mums with their babies (it was quickly moved). No ensuites anywhere. I also needed IV drugs every X hours day and night so that would've disturbed others in a bay, and they were 6 to a bay in that hospital. They also didn't feed dads, very adamant on that one!

I've since moved and am going to a midwife unit this time all being well, it has three private rooms that look like Premier Inn rooms, 6 hours later and you're out! Anything happens pre or post birth (or going "high risk" between now and labour, like I did last time ) and I'd have to go to hospital an hour away and I have no idea what it's like or even where it is to be honest.

Woah @LillianFullStop £850 a night that's crazy! I'm not entirely sure what our postnatal ward is like as they've obviously stopped the tours and I'm a FTM

@BirdGarden I hope it all goes smoothly for you and you just get discharged from the birth centre

@Cornishbumpkin yes it's in a private wing rather than just a side room that's why it's so expensive! Last time I asked they were reserved for Covid patients that needed to be isolated but we'll see. If I was in for just one night i might consider splashing out on it but if I needed a 5 night stay for some reason then probably not!

My friend had her baby 6 months ago and she said her trolley thing with the baby in (you know the clear plastic bassinet) was lockable so mums could go to the bathroom and then unlock it with a wrist tag once back in the bay. She said she forgot to unlock a couple of times which sets an alarm off! She also said she had another wrist tag and the baby had a foot tag so they can always tell which babies belong to which mums. On being wheeled for one of the checks, the midwife couldn't see the tag on her baby but thankfully found it caught up in bedding. She said that was lucky because otherwise they have to lock down the entire ward and do a mother and baby roll call!

No idea if this is just at her hospital of course!

@nakelip wow that sounds terribly advanced!

They do put name bands on mum and baby pretty quickly even in an emergency; I did regret that because we didn't instantly have a name for her, my daughter's just said "infant [surname]" (we had chosen a name but just wanted to look at her together first and commit to it, but all three of us were scattered to the winds so it wasn't quite as instant as we'd imagined!)

Thank you @LillianFullStop - I am half expecting Lenny Henry to jump out of a cupboard up there. Same wall colours, same furniture as Premier Inn. If only there was a breakfast buffet after

Guys have you bought any long sleeved vests?

I haven't due to it being summer but now not so sure??

Also how many pairs of socks have you bought for baby?

No long sleeved vests in newborn sizes. I don't think I've many socks either, as planning to use mainly sleepsuits to begin with. Socks were funny on DS as he was so skinny with massive feet, they were all really baggy on his wee sparrow legs

@APD1981 that sounds great! Sounds like you’re really lucky with where you are.

The hospital I’m attending is a women’s hospital with birth centre and has different options at different prices but if I have a natural birth with midwife assistance it’ll be a two night/three day stay for about £1,000, or if I have a section then I think it’s a 5 night stay for a similar price. But there are different levels of rooms available so it depends which room you’re in. All private rooms. Option to have baby in room or keep in the nursery (I’m definitely keeping baby in room with me). Either a bed or a sofa for husband to sleep on depending on the room. Meals included for me but can pay extra for husbands meals.
Giving birth at a regular hospital is much cheaper but they don’t have midwives and the nurses aren’t trained in birthing so much more clinical and higher rates of avoidable interventions and sections etc.
I’ve been really pleased with the medical care I’ve had here while pregnant but there are some things that are so different to back home and it’s hard to get used to sometimes.

My hospital is an NHS hospital but I'm really lucky as all postnatal rooms are private with en suite! DH can stay and has a recliner chair to sleep on and meals are provided for him aswell. If I have a natural birth and all goes to plan I could be leaving within 4 hours if I choose to. If I have a cesarian then i have to stay for one night minimum.

As for long sleeved vests I haven't got any! I was thinking of buying some for September when it might get a bit chilly.

I got baby clothes a while ago so I did get some long sleeved vests as well as short sleeved. Might not even use but we'll see !

Had my 38 week appointment today (39 weeks tomorrow !)and all seems well. She said baby isn't engaged yet but didn't mention anything further. Should he be engaging by now? I'm not going out out for walks but try to exercise 30 min every other day and walk around the garden (aimlessly) most days. Should I be doing more ?

@Rinoa when I read up on this it says that some babies don’t engage until your in labour, so I don’t think it’s anything to worry about. I’m sure your midwife would have said if there was anything you needed to be doing differently.
Do you have a birth ball? Apparently bouncing on those can help with getting baby’s head engaged, but I don’t think it matters if you don’t do it.

We have a couple of random long sleeve vests that are up to one month in size, but it was purely because we loved the design on them, plus thought the weather can be so unpredictable so useful just in case of a random cold snap. But 90% of her clothes are 0-3 months size and are short sleeve vests and sleep suits.
We have about 10 pairs for socks, just for those days if it does get hella hot and humid she can be in a little vest & romper and she can have socks to keep her feet warm.

Back up at Daycare today and all is well. Bloods good, baby lazy but happy and I got a lovely cuppa too! Puked in the car park on the way out - will definitely not miss that bit of pregnancy!

The decision on induction will likely be made on Tue after the growth scan but tbh I'd rather not go beyond 40 weeks so am leaning heavily toward induction regardless.

MW said I was having good tightenings today although I can't feel them! DH is taking the credit for that as we managed a quickie last night and he is now proposing a daily ride 'for health reasons'! Nice try, big yin!

@Gigitree thanks for that! yes I have a birth ball, and try to bounce on it here and there but funnily enough it actually gives me worse PGP! I mentioned that today to mW and didn't really say anything to that lol mw is not constant but the one I got today is not my fave....she just has really short answers. I'm horrible but I hope she's not the one there when I give birth. lol

I have long sleeved vests in 0-3 as not expecting to be needing them for another couple months. Only 4 pairs of socks if he's in an outfit but I think the early days like @MissisBee he will be in a sleep suit with hands and feet covered up.

I have my pre op appointment tomorrow and they've called me to say they will do a Covid swab test.