Due Dec 2007 on the wind down?

[suey2]

has this worked?

wow seems like a lot of us are in the same boat... hormonal and miserable and feeling like we still have such a long way to go!

i was like this with my last pregnancy so know it is completely normal and we all get to this point somewhere along the pregnancy. i seem to snap at my partner and the kids so easily att he mo and at the time it all feels so justified... later i realise it isnt and get all emotional... i know its hormones but tryiong explaining that too an agitated 7 year old and an overwhelmed 20 month old. i do often wonder if we have done the right thing, but its a decision out of our hands now... we wanted this baby so badly and it will be desperately loved, as will the boys BUT for now i have to accept i cant be the mummy i wanted to be! (though i know she will be back in a few weeks)

i guess pregnancy is a good lesson to us all... we aint no super woman! hugs to all xxx

Count me in as another pissed-off-fed-up-grumpy-sod.

However, we have a car seat, a new mattress for the pram, and a change mat.

Had to smile though, as neither DH nor I was particularly bothered about the colour of the carseat (choice of 8!) and the saleswoman responded with "Oh, obviously not a first baby then?" We must be odd - first baby, and much longed-for, but as long as the car seat is safe and relatively easy to clean....

Morning everyone!
Hope you are all well!
Thelady - your DH's blog was very funny! at the salesperson - at least you got your priorities right!
Saw my friend's ds (12do!) last night, he was very alert looking around at everything! She gave me some lovely Mother Goose products, including some stretch mark cream - i need it. DH spotted the other day that I have these red marks all over the bottom of my tummy now

morning all

thelady - very exciting you have started to buy things
did anyone watch 'bringing up baby' on channel 4 last night? dh and I had a little giggle about it, especially how much we'd 'wronged' ds by putting him in a cot, loved the sling tho - had a look for one before but they are expensive for a bit of fabric, wondering if I can be arsed to make one....

lost track of everyone else
mixedmama - hugs and hope you're doing ok, all here if you need to vent/get an action plan sorted!

claraq - add me to the list!

and to everyone else whos fed up, I'll join your gang too - after watching the babies on telly last night I really want this one to arrive - roll on xams!

morning all,
off for my hospital test this morning. Fingers crossed.
Dreamed I gave birth last night (after reading prem thread) and it was a girl! But at 30 weeks. Another fabulous night's sleep. Not.

good luck suey - come back on later and let us know how it went (dream last night was prob stress about test today x)

Morning all,

bouncing - yes I saw 'bringing up baby' last night - me and DH had great fun categorising all the parents we knew as being one of the three methods (surprisingly easy to do!). It's strange how strongly emotional you feel about these things - I just thought that woman who thought babies should be left to cry until it was time for the next four-hourly feed was evil. I was literally shouting at her every time she came on

thanks for suggestions re rib itching - reckon it is just where my bra rubs as the skin can't be stretching so far up, can it??

good luck with the test suey2, fingers crossed

kerioke - I've been worrying about not being able to be the sort of mother I want to be when this second one comes along - I think we set ourselves too high expectations though and then feel guilty when we don't reach them. I'm sure your ds's think you are the best mum in the world!

had a quick look at a thread about baby prog and it made me laugh - one women said 'how ridiculous that you shouldn't pick your baby up, if you've carried it for 9 months and delivered it out in the most painfully unfeasible way then its yours to cuddle, its your prize!' totally agree think the most sensible thing that strict woman said was foxes wouldn't eat the babies, and that was it!

I love this thread for reassurance, I've started to worry about coping with two aswell - ordered that book you were reading skiddale so hopefully I can get prepared

morning everyone,

Firstly, just wanna say thx for yeserday. Went home had a lovely bath and really just relaxed and had a better nights sleep than i have in a while. Altho DH snoring was still awful - at lunchtime today I am buying some of those patches they advertise on TV.

We watched that Bringing Up Baby. It was interesting because I liked bits of all the routines altho agree the routine one was far too strict. I do sort of think when it is bedtime it is good to let them cry a little but you do need to go back and at least sooth them. I was completely mortified about leaving them in the garden by thereself. But, the concept behind it was good, in that being outside made them tired, but why not go for a walk, sit in the garden and read a book.

The Dr Spock one seemed to just be about doing whatever feels right which I guess is a combination of all of them really for me. I liked the sling idea, but couldnt walk around with baby all of the time, I think you do need "you" time and that method just doesnt seem to provide any of that. And, i know BF is best but made me laugh when she was explaining that basically the doctors know nothing.

ohh sorry and suey good luck for today.

where is that thread - i knew there would be a discussion about it today.

glad you're feeling a bit more positive today mixedmama

I agree that its a mix of all three routines that'll work best - best thing my mum said to me when she catch me reading baby books before ds was take all the bits you like from them and don't bother with the stuff you don't, worked for us
I liked idea of sling as a 'hands free' baby kit so I coule, ie, get ds's lunch and have baby with me - agree you need you time too - thats why ds had a dummy for first 3 months, I was so against them before he was born but it meant dh could settle him without me and that was invaluable at times

the thread is under Telly adicits - its mostly a rant about how awful the strict routine is, was going to link it but there seems to be more than one now!

I am sure I will have plenty of time on my hands today - as ever.... and read them all. i knew that one would spark the controversy.... the thing is the concepts are quite good and simple I think just the way they are implemented is wrong (IMO obviously).

I knew there would be a thread about that programme too! Have managed to resist looking so-far as I really need to get some work done!

I know what you mean MM about routine being good etc but encouraging parents not to cuddle or touch their babies and to avoid eye contact just seems insane.

Although I like the idea of a sling I thought the woman proponent of that method was a bit of an idiot and came out with all sorts of rubbish IMO - both she and the strict woman seemed to think they knew what babies wanted and expected when they came into the world. I liked the Dr. Spock woman because she didn't presume to know anything - just followed the baby's and the mother's leads...

insy - I have just finished that book and my opinion of it has changed. Like claraq said it is probably useful for giving you the worst case scenario but it is REALLY negative - all relationships will virtually collapse on arrival of number 2, you will tear yourself apart trying to love two children, you will become the sort of mother you always said you'd never be (shouting impatient etc) - I just don't believe it will be that bad - in fact I think it will be lovely and wonderful!!

MM glad you're feeling better today

Am either having braxton Hicks (27 weeks) or this baby has big feet and is kicking the shit out of my diaphragm ...anyone having them yet (2nd baby)??? [OUCH]

skiddale - I ordered the book on line so will prob give it a go and try not to get too worried about it, although will prob be on here for reassurance

What I found so interesting about the prog last night was how emotive the language used was - the first lady was too strict (and without having children of your own how can you be a guru?) but the sling lady was a little nuts about attactment parenting and used loads of words like helping your baby develop a sense of 'rightness' whats that?? another way of making us feel guilty I think!

found the slings on line.... 50 pounds although as they pointed out cheaper than a pram - since we have two buggies at the moment maybe I should ebay one

insy - I got a (new) sling for 20 quid - will see if I can find a link (got it ages ago for dd so can't really remember where we got it)

completely agree about the 3rd woman's talk of 'rightness' and 'wrongness'!

macdoodle - hello! you haven't been on for a while - yes I've been getting BH's for ages and they are getting stronger and stronger - think this is typical with 2nd pregnancies

macdoodle - not having bh yet, but loads of uncomfortable kicks, mainly down around cervix tho - hope it gets more comfortable

Morning everyone.

Insywinsy, what's this about a cot being wrong?!! Oh dear I have so much to learn. Or perhaps the only thing to learn is to ignore advice and do what you think is best.

Saw the midwife yesterday. Luckily all ok. Baby was head down but still free to move about. Took the decision to change to the homebirth midwife team. Hope I won't regret it.

Hello everyone!! Think I'm about half way through all your posts...will try and catch up tomorrow but desperate to go to bed now and its only 9.10pm here in NZ!
DD and I had a lovely week on the Gold Coast of Australia. Nice and warm and we managed to do some new stuff as well as visit old favourites. Nice also to spend a little time with my parents who were there at the same time for some of the time (if that makes sense). Only minor stress-out was when we ran out of petrol just turning onto the motorway in the middle of a thunderstorm and had to wait 45 mins for a tow truck waving cars to go around us...mind you DD thought it was sooo exciting to go in the tow truck cab
Am seeing MW tomorrow first time in 6 weeks. Everything feels OK although I feel huge now and and steering clear of the scales after all that junk food

I found the 3rd woman really scary. I think she was on the programme about BF, altho it could have been someone else. I think you need lots of affection etc, but to always have your baby attached to you doesnt seem healthy either to me. There were times when DS wouldnt settle that i would put him in his sling whilst I cooked etc, but i need my space as well. Certainly Spock lady was most appealing as it was about what you want.

Been bit stressed with H and OW/baby etc etc getting scared of being single mum to 6 year old and new baby (but with H not really gone but not really here and helping), money stuff, house needs work doing ASAP.... and knackered
But going shopping with MIL for pram/buggy tomorrow ....maybe she'll offer to buy me the bugaboo

Oh, and on the topic of alcohol there was an item on the news here in NZ tonight about research which has shown that moderate consumption of alcohol enhances memory. So perhaps that explains why pregnant women have poorer memory - they aren't drinking enough alcohol!!!

Mrswizz - how exciting about the home birth. I have broached this several times with DH but he is really uncomfy with the idea and I think he wont be much use if he isnt completely at ease and I am fine with hospital so i guess we will stick with that.

mrswizz - a cot isn't wrong! there was a programme on channel 4 last night and one 'guru' believed that you should share a bed with baby, cots were a victoria invention etc etc and if you put your baby in a cot they developed a sense of 'wrongness' with the world - dh and I were just laughing about what this meant, is the word even in the dictionary?? I rang my mum afterwards to say she'd 'wronged' me she was watching prog too

we're also aiming for a home birth - will have to discuss what we need closer to the time! I haven't a clue except asking anyone I know for old towels if they are having a clear out and will be on freecycle nearer the time for some - dh came back proudly telling me plastic sheeting from B&Q was only about 10 pounds, I think he's come round to the idea

Hi buzzy! Glad you had a good holiday and welcome back (although don't know if I can say that when I am on the other side of the world..) like you logic about alcohol and memory!

Mrswizz - congrats on your decision to have a homebirth - I'm sure it will be wonderful and I am a little as well!

macdoodle - oh dear sounds v. stressful. Are you still considering a reconciliation with your H? It must be so hard not being with him but not not being with him IYKWIM

MM - totally agree the last woman was a loon! The more I think about her the more of a loon I think she was. She looked about 12 years old as well!