June 2019 - Part 7!

[Kescilly]

Hi ladies! Picking names, packing hospital bags - third trimester here we come!

I thought I'd start out with the stats this time and I'll post the updated name list in a bit. I've just included the data that I have, since a lot of people are missing bits (or quite possibly I've missed their posts). We come from all over, so I'll put that bit in another post later as well.

Our average age at estimated due date is 33! That should help some of us who are feeling older.

And that's not just because we're all second-timers! In fact, most of us are having our first baby this year.

Baby #1 - 31
Baby #2 - 26
Baby #3 - 9
Baby #4 - 1
Babies 1&2 together! - 1

Fifteen of us are expecting lovely little boys, nineteen of us are expecting darling little girls, and at least sixteen of us are waiting to be surprised!

The average due date is June 13th, and the most popular due date is June 24th. We don't have anyone expecting on the 15th, 23rd, 27th, or 30th as far as I can tell.

And if you happen to have a baby on my birthday (June 16th), your baby will be born on Father's Day this year!

Drink tonic water. Natural source of quinine that is good for cramps/restless legs.

Wonder who’ll pop first out of all of us? I’d happily do it now. I want my body back!!!

I can't wait to not be pregnant, I'm at the stage where everything hurts, hips back fingers name it. Had my 36 week appointment with the midwife today and she said baby is 1/5th engaged, so he's on the move in the right direction.

Hopefully just a few more weeks until this thread contains baby pics!!!

Oh I know @fee1234 I’m so done. 35 weeks tomorrow and want these next few weeks to hurry up

Can totally relate @fee1234, 37 weeks today and so glad to be full term. Want this baby out now, everything hurts, the list is so long I can't even be bothered to type it. One thing I did think I had escaped though but realised yesterday I haven't - haemorrhoids 😳

So glad I'm not the only one who is totally done with this pregnancy malarkey! Counting down the days until I'm on maternity leave (2 weeks to go!). Now that the doctors have told me she could come anytime I'm fully expecting her to camp out in there and be overdue

I’m sorry I haven’t replied to messages individually, been busy and a bit worn out!

Hope everyone is doing as well as possible.

I went in for reduced movements on Monday and since it was my second time, they did a scan yesterday. Baby looks well but fluid is a bit high. They’re happy to wait for my c-section on May 28th but want to do another scan next week. I’ve lost track of all the appointments now, seems there is something every day.

Felt a bit weird last night. Is it possible to feel your cervix dilating? I started to feel a bit like I used to with my period and started panic-throwing things into a suitcase. How did I get to 37 weeks without packing a bag?!

Does anyone have tips on what to bring to dress baby in? Baby might be a bit large so not sure on sizes or combinations of clothing. We are already so useless at this baby’s stuff, don’t even understand how to dress them!

Also any suggestions for myself now that I’m having a c-section. I don’t know if the clothes I had bought will be suitable now.

I also bought all these bits for recovering from a vaginal birth and I don’t really need them now. Offered to my NCT group but no one seems interested.

For baby (if you think it’s gonna be big) get babygros no smaller than 53cm. Typically this is 0-3m. Any smaller (50cm) is “newborn” and my 3.8kg whoppers barely fitted into them. Same goes for baby vests.

CSection recovery: you will bleed vaginally so take the maternity pads (at least 25) and massive granny pants. I bought two sizes bigger black full briefs from Primark. They looked fucking enormous when I got them out before...worked a treat after.

Primark are also doing some high waisted harem pants if you fancy an unethical shop - harems (next size up) worked for me as the waistband went right under my boobs.

Boobs: they will leak a bit so take pads but more importantly just take soft crop top nursing bra things (several) so you can just tug out a boob easy then slip it away with a pad on.

CSection snack tips: get some dried apricots. Not as aggressive as prunes but the hospital will want a poo from you before discharge. All the drugs can bind you up inside so don’t be afraid of shitting yourself with one apricot too many.

And finally, please may I recommend shopping online for a men’s length black dressing gown/towelling robe? Black hides the blood, basically.

Here endeth the lesson

Pretty done with being pregnant now too - although I have less than 2 weeks till my maternity leave starts, and ideally, I'd like a week to just be at home, relax and get all the final pieces ready. Plus get a massage, a pedicure and a bit of time for myself!

@kescilly I've planned a bit for a c-section too as there's a chance of induction and therefore a higher risk of a c-section. My midwife recommended getting some high-waist knickers - those granny-style ones that come up very high. They'll hold your pads in place, and won't chafe on the surgery scar (which'll be just around your bikini line). I bought a 5-pack of black cotton high-waist pants from Primark, which I can bin after each use if necessary. The actual disposable ones looked a bit uncomfortable.
I also bought a nursing nightie- I opted for a spaghetti-strap one from Gap, but some people prefer a button-down type shirt. I was warned that the wards are hot, hence the strappy nightie. But I'll bring my old dressing gown along too. I think a dress-style nightie is better than pyjamas so the catheter can stay in place easier & again the waistline won't chafe on your stomach!
I also got some fluffy socks - I was told the floors might be cold and I'm prone to foot cramps.
I think other than that the packing list isn't very different! I packed a few 0-1 size babygrows and vests for the baby, and a few slightly bigger ones. I think probably the ones with feet attached and foldable hands are the best - then you don't have to worry about socks and scratch mitts separately. Also I packed two little hats - one for immediately after birth which might get grummy, and one for going home in.

I'm starting to feel really apprehensive about giving birth. Well, I say apprehensive but I mean scared. I have done SO many birth prep classes now but they seem to have the wrong effect on me and I'm actually more scared now than before doing them

Ah @paulhollywoodssexgut was faster - I've promised myself no more Primark shopping after birth as I truly dislike them (sorry for the off-topic). Good idea about the men's bathrobe in black too!

@PaulHollywoodsSexGut so helpful, thank you! Slightly tempted to take my husband’s robe that I hate so that he has to get a new one. Also 25 maternity pads I have one pack from Boots, should probably go stock up!

I’ve never actually bought anything from Primark. I have been in the store twice and both times found it really stressful and crowded. Will source giant underwear from somewhere though.

I’ve bought some soft nursing bras from H&M but I’ve already outgrown them. I don’t know where to get larger sizes without spending a fortune, but there’s no way I’ll fit into the typical XL that stores usually go up to. That’s the problem with strappy nighties too, they’ll never hold me up!

Never heard of the apricot tip so I will definitely be stocking up tonight, thank you!

@swiftfox can we do anything to help? I was initially really stressed about childbirth and found that the hypnobirthing digital course helped me with that. Also going totally in with room sprays and candles and such (none of which I’ll now use). Is there a particular aspect that you’re worried about? Maybe a STM can reassure you.

Funny about all the primark talk, I’m on my way there today to buy big pants and comfy pjs!

Ps: for those of you who are having baby #1 you will sweat and leak milk in the fortnight after birth so you may wish to invest in some black sheets and duvet sets

I was like a sweaty, greasy lactating seal both times before and DC1 and 2 are winter babas.

Just done my penultimate flight - next one is back to the UK for the birth! Will be 35+4 for that one and it will be enough.

Liking all the hospital bag tips but have been purposely ignoring that part until I'm actually back. Wonder if I will be the last to get myself sorted- still no pram or car seat either! No NCT or other prep classes either we are hoping for natural instinct.

Sympathies to all for the aches and pains. I have the puffy ankles and a bout of leg cramps this morning but have otherwise been feeling lucky!

@Kescilly good ol' M&S do nursing bras which don't cost that much and go up quite well in cup sizes. I got a few from Bravissimo, which cost £32 each. Expensive, but I am guessing I will live in them for a bit....
I also ordered a crop-top looking one from hotmilk (such a cringe-worthy name though!). It was £15 on the sale and it's super-soft.

Yeah, not sure why I've suddenly started feeling anxious both about the birth AND the first weeks with the baby. My husband hasn't had any experience with babies and although he's learning and trying, he's naturally very optimistic and thinks it'll all be fine (which it most likely will be!) so sometimes I feel like I'm left to worry about the worst-case scenario alone. It doesn't help that I don't have any family in the UK - I'd love to have my mum around.

@swiftfox I completely understand, I don’t have any family here either. My parents are going to visit and my mom is going to stay a full month with us. I think I’d be much more anxious otherwise! Especially with the recovery from a c-section.

Can you have any family visit? What sort of support do you have in the area? I always feel more alone than I am. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. And my husband does the optimistic thing too. Sometimes it’s helpful and a good attitude to have, but other times it drives me nuts. I don’t like getting worked up about things, but it does make me feel like I have to do more prep while he’s all “It will all come together.” It doesn’t just happen on its own!

I do have a few Bravissimo bras that I love, but I seem to keep growing and am hesitant to commit to anything too pricey right now. I’ll try M&S though, that’s a good idea. I don’t think I’ve bought anything from there before. I’m still getting used to the stores here!

@allfurcoatnoknickers Ive been having bananas and then tonic water in the evening and since then my leg cramps have been much better!

@Kescilly @swiftfox No family here either. I suppose there's DH's family near-ish by, but they're very dysfunctional and not a lot of help. I actually ended up hiring a post-partum Doula to help out for a week or so after the baby is born, because I know nothing about babies, have zero maternal instincts and my anxiety was through the roof.

My parents are coming for a week at the end of June, but since my Mum is already making snide comments about how I need to lose the baby weight, I doubt it's going to be a fun, or helpful visit.

I bought these from M&S when I got to the point where I couldn't bear the thought of wearing a bra:
www.marksandspencer.com/2-pack-non-wired-crop-bras/p/p20138158?carousel=FUNH_AT_SIMILAR_END

They are very low support and super stretchy, so although not a maternity bra they'll work really well for breastfeeding. If you're happy to go with low support they might be a good option. They are also super comfy to sleep in. I got a medium (currently at 36E).

I have all of my stuff ready to pack into my hospital bag...I just haven't actually gotten round to doing it yet! It's the first thing on the to-do list once I go on maternity leave.

I've got my 34 week appointment tomorrow, fingers crossed all plodding along.
New thing: a feeling of being headbutted in the cervix I think baby might be migrating downwards...

I bought some huge pants today. They are really comfy!

I’ve got bits ready to go into a bag but I do need a primark run for pjs etc. I refuse to buy cheap pants though, at a time where let’s face it, everything’s a bit sore, I am more than happy to buy soft underwear for some comfort

Forgot about the night sweats, thanks for reminder .

Musts for me last time were boots maternity pads (lots of) midwife recommended I change it every time I used the loo. I healed very well last time so I’ll be doing the same this time. Also for hospital I found it useful to have nappy sacks/pads/water wipes in a little bag to pop to the loo with. I am also taking stool softeners to have as soon as baby is born!

@Kescilly if I go for an ELCS too our babies will be birthday buddies! :)

For baby clothes for hospital I found vests and sleepsuits the best option. Lovely and cosy and comfy. Easy to change. Some people do a proper going home outfit but we just had a sweet little going home hoodie for our son which worked great. Have a blanket or two packed as well as it may be cool especially if you get discharged in the evening (or middle of the night as we did first time around!)

For you definitely echo all the above especially the high waisted granny pants. Honestly the bigger the better! I’ve also read a tip that sticking a maternity pad across the front of your giant knickers can help cushion the wound. Might be worth trying out.

Also pack some flip flops/sandals you don’t need to bend to get on. Primark have some 90p ones which may be just the thing for hospital showering.

I found the hospital very hot so would go lightweight with dressing gown/layers. Hand held fan was used. Also glad I had some sweets to suck as it did get a bit dry and a throat tickle with a c-sec wound is not what you want!

One thing I found was the hospital beds which you can move up and down on the button were great to get up/positioned. But at home I found laying down flat and getting up from flat hard to begin with and we got a bed back rest from Argos which I found really helpful.

One word: fuck.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/3581531-Possible-CSection-at-35-6-please-can-I-get-a-handhold-your-experiences

Oh shit @PaulHollywoodsSexGut that must be super scary...
I don't think it's probably that helpful to tell you (as you already went though it at 39 weeks...) that my colleagues twins were just delivered by c section at 35 weeks due to concerns about 1 twin's growth but neither even needed to go in an incubator - but I still want to tell you that. Hope you get some support and helpful advice on the other thread and IRL too of course.

@PaulHollywoodsSexGut I just wanted to hand hold and send a virtual hug x