June 2019 - Part 6!

[Kescilly]

Welcome to the middle of the second trimester, ladies! Apologies if anyone has been left off the list!

Kescilly, 1st baby, due May 29th

rollerskaterdata, 2nd baby, due 30th May

Sassehmonsta, 2nd baby, due 31st May

Torsz, 1st baby, due 31st May

PeachPotato, DC2, due 2nd June

Fee1234, 1st baby, due 3rd June

Stellarfox, 1st baby, due 4th June

Fiona1619, DC2, due 4th June

Ksjourney, DC2, due 5th June

Mummytomollyandbean, due 6th June

MadeInCornwallx3, DC 3, due 7th June

SK17, DC1, due 7th June

ExcitedMama, DC2, due 8th June

Fabuluce, DC2, due 9th June

Silversister, DC1, due 9th June

Chocomalt, DC2, due 9th June

annihall, DC1, due 10th June

lstef, DC1+2!, due 10th June

Bimbabo, 1st baby, due 11th June

Diamondbutterfy, DC3, due 11th June

Heebyjeeby99, DC1, due 11th June

CrazyCowLady, DC1, due 11th June

KoalasAteMyHomework, DC2, due 12th June

Toasterstrudle, DC2, due 13th June

Napssavelives, dc3, due 14th June

Kimbishop86, dc2, due 14th June

Toomanyflatwhites, dc2, due 14th June

Blondcat, dc1, due 14th June

emily1511, 1st baby, DD 16th June

hexagon01, DC2, due 16th June

R4ch4el12, 1st baby, due 17th June

HoneyPea, 1st baby, due 18th June

2countries1bump, 1st baby (girl), due 19th June

Spargle, 1st baby, due 19th June

Curlypasta, dc3, due 20th June

Holly257, DC3, due 21st June

WeeBean, 1st baby, due 21st June

Bigonesmallone3, DC3, due 22nd June

Pigriver, DC2, due 22nd June

mindthechaos, DC3, due 24th June

Socktastic, DC2, due 24th June

Reastie, DC2, due 24th June

thedocisin, DC2, due 24th June

MauisLeftNipple, DC4, due 24th June

LauralovesLuke, DC1, due 25th June

Coastergirl, 2nd baby, due 26th June.

JBCG 1st baby, due 28th June

Weebean I may admit to being a bit of a West life fan in my teens too

Kescilly from what I understand pg health care in the us is far more monitoring by a doctor and medicalised than here, last time I think I saw a consultant once in my whole pg and only saw mws at every stage for the checks. It’s a very different approach.

Those with gd, I’ve been told I’ll need to monitor my bloods as I had suspected gd last time and have refused gtt this time (long story). I said to the mw I still have my old blood sugar monitor if they want to reuse it I just need some more of the sticks and she told me it would be out of date (8 years old) and now they do blood testing via a phone app which automatically sends the data to the diabetes clinic (last time I had to email them all the data I wrote down every day) and that my old monitor wouldn’t be any good. How can you do blood sugar readings from just a phone?! I’m wondering if my mw was mistaken and I’ll need a monitor which somehow talks to my phone to send data. Andthere was me feeling happy tonhave saved the nhs money on giving me a new monitor!

Reastie I was told by the pharmacist that the strips for my monitor from last time (4 years ago) aren't made anymore so I ended up buying a new monitor in boots as I didn't want to wait. I got one of the cheapest but there were more expensive ones in there that said they had Bluetooth to automatically record the readings on a phone. I'd imagine that's what they meant.

Today's half term mad baby lady activity is washing the clothes etc for the hospital bag I said I wouldn't do anything like that til at least viability week but I'm nearly there and had two friends go VERY early (one with a good outcome!) so am a bit conscious. Never thought I'd be sitting picking those tiny little quality control stickers off washing labels though 😂

That makes sense changing. The mw I saw said I wouldn’t need any kind of monitor at all, just a phone

I can't see how that would work but then I'm definitely no technology expert.

@Changingagain I was thinking about bringing it up with the endocrinologist when I see him next week. I see him because I have hypothyroidism. I know that can be a risk factor linked to GD. Also my BMI and ethnicity put me at increased risk. So while I’m not convinced that I will develop it, I feel insecure about the fact that they aren’t going to test me again.

Thanks for the info, I don’t really know anyone who has had GD and I’m unfamiliar with the protocols here.

@Torsz that’s pretty much my exact situation! We had to go in on Valentine’s Day as I hadn’t felt the baby move the whole day. It was our first time hearing the heartbeat and I’ve never felt so relieved. I agree that it seems worthwhile at this stage, I’m 26 weeks today! If the midwife at the hospital was using the doppler then surely the community midwife could as well? Wouldn’t they want to know if something could be wrong?

Had a 25 week appointment as "high risk"/increased monitoring due to GD. She took blood pressure, did a urine dip, measured the bump and listened to heartbeat. He didn't want to be heard so took more than 5 mins to find it - midwife likes a good challenge! Wasn't worried about not being able to find it as he's obviously moving around well, kicking the Doppler and rolling away from her . Hoped I would have a calmer baby this time round, but it seems not.

My monitor from last time round was a SureCare one - the NHS no longer provide this brand as the test strips are expensive along with the lancets. Instead, I now have another brand one. I passed my old one onto my mother who is being investigated for T2 Diabetes.

Just realised today that I am entitled to paid leave for antenatal appointments - I have been rearranging my hours so I am still doing my full hours! Annoyed as could be on my way home by now, but I already agreed to work until 2:15 today so I can leave 12.45 tomorrow. Next appointment I am taking it as paid leave!!

I can't believe how little some of you are getting- I had Doppler at 16 weeks (though wasn't expecting it so early based on what I'd read here) but would have thought everyone would have it at 25 week appointment? Plus my green book is full of (almost illegible 😂) information. I don't understand how care can vary so much across trusts when we're talking about such low-cost things, five minutes here and there of a midwife's time surely can't be budget busting?

I've just seen the midwife (22 weeks). All good and eventually heard the heartbeat when she stopped kicking the doppler away. However I forgot to request the matb1 form and half hour after she told me, I've forgotten when my next appointment is.

@Heyha this is my second baby but in a different trust and things are different here than they were last time I was pregnant! I had my 25 week appt last week (am 26 weeks tomorrow) and heard the heartbeat but didn't get my bump measured! I was shocked as I was convinced it would be, NHS site says so but midwife said no, she starts doing it week 28 🤷‍♀️

On a separate note in my head I'm entering third trimester tomorrow. I know common agreement is week 28, some say week 27 and even fewer say week 26. I'm going with the minority here just to get me there faster 😂

@Kescilly definitely - I understand it at 16 weeks as they can struggle to find the heartbeat but by 25+ I totally disagree with their logic! She did say if I was really desperate to hear it then she would, but I didn't want to be difficult 😆

@rollerskaterdata we're 26 weeks on Friday but I'm afraid I'm with the majority so 2 weeks to go until third trimester for me!

I have a Doppler every week and have done since 21 weeks so am proof that it is entirely possible. I'm pretty sure by 25 weeks you should be able to hear the baby's heart beat with a stethoscope so why a trained midwife can't pick it up with a Doppler I have no idea!

I seem to have dropped off this thread for a while! 23 weeks tomorrow and suffering really badly with sinusitis and because I'm preggers I can't take anything other than paracetamol! Tried the whole steam inhalation thing and that didn't work either!! Anyone else suffering with tiredness I honestly find myself drifting off most days! Also bought our pram!!!! Had to wash all the baby clothes yesterday as I pulled the box out from when I had DS1 4 years ago and some of them had yellow stains on them luckily they've all come clean! Anyone else not found out what they are having?

I’m with @Torsz, I was 26 weeks yesterday and still consider myself in the second trimester. I’m not ready for the third trimester!

26 weeks tomorrow, and announcing that I am 6 months pregnant feels good. HA. I am pretending it will make me 3rd trimester because I hate the second one so much right now.

I have been to my GP surgery 3 times last week and another 3 times this week, for various things. Blood test, iron tablets, repeat prescription drop offs, midwife, nurse appointment for me, doctors appointment for DD. I have had enough of the place, and hope to not need to be back there until next midwife appointment in 4 weeks!

I now have iron tablets and antibiotics for chest infection too. The body that just keeps on giving.....

Wriggly baby makes concentrating so tricky at work - he keeps kicking the desk and my lower ribs! Get out of it mate.

6.5 weeks left at work, and 2 days of those are booked as holiday already, and 2-3 will be short days when I have clinic appointments. So, literally 30 days left here. WOOP! I can't wait to be at home and not having to commute or get out of bed other than 2 days a week!

I a post yesterday that inspired this:

I am currently "outsourcing my pancreatic responsibility" to 2 types of insulin and some metformin.

It properly makes me laugh when I think about it.

I'm pretty sure elective sections have been mentioned in one of our June threads but couldn't find it. Just wondering what people's experiences are of requesting an elective section, particularly for your first baby?

I've always had a fear of birth, specifically the need for intervention, long term damage to me and most importantly the possibility of baby getting stuck and then not getting enough oxygen and the consequences of that. It's actually what put me off having children for years but I have no idea where the fear has come from. Right from the day I found out I was pregnant it has niggled at the back of my mind but now at nearly 23 weeks the last few days it has started to consume me and I'm growing increasingly worried about it. I think the fact I've found pregnancy so physically and mentally draining (HG, being signed off work for 10 weeks, still vomiting 3 times a day, being knackered all the time, pretty much constant hip and back pain) hasn't helped. I struggle with 7 hours in work (not particularly physical either) so no idea how I would manage labour that could potentially last days. It's wrecking my head and I'm getting quite upset over it, which is totally not me at all!

I know the guidelines say it's up to the mum but have any of you actually been listened to and got what you asked for?

@SassehMonsta I've got 4 weeks left at work and can't bloody wait to be finished! Glad I've got someone else considering themselves third trimester now along with me!

@weebean

I keep saying this to everyone but call your midwife and ask if you would be able to discuss your options/fears for birth as if you have this type of thing recorded on your notes NOW then it means you could have less of a battle when you have your birth options chat at around 35 weeks.

The clinical term (I think) is tokophobia and some trusts take it more seriously than others - basically from what I can gauge FTMs requesting an elective have the hardest battle but again this is moot depending on trust/how a consultant is feeling that day.

But yeah, call your midwife for a chat.

Thanks Paul! I've an appointment on the 4th March so I'll bring it up then, I hate the thought of pestering them over something they won't see as an immediate concern. I've been doing research for a couple of weeks so hopefully that'll help my case 🤞

Weebean I had the same feelings last time but unfortunately it was before the nice guidelines said you coukd have an elective section for anything other than being medically necessary. I endured 5 days of being induced where my body was so scared of labour it refused to play ball. Eventually they said th induction had failed and I got a csection! This time I have been told by my mw there will be no problems in me having one baving had one before yet the hospital haven’t yet said I can and tell me I have to see a ‘birth choices mw’ which I presume is where they try to talk me out of it (they won’t!) and to try a vbac. I believe the guidelines are that you cannot be refused an elective section but you may have to jump through hoops (eg seeing a birth choices mw) to get it. Agree, start mentioning it now so they are aware.

So I saw the mh nurse yesterday who was absolutely useless. Didn’t understand the extent of mental debilitation caused by my nausea and didn’t seem to actually get it at all. She asked me when the nausea stopped with dd and I told her as soon as I gave birth and she seemed to think this was very strange. She was fixated on a historical mh issue I have rather than dealing with issues I’m having with pg. I wanted to her help me get answers that consultants have been unable to tell me or help me with (‘we won’t tell you about that until 36 weeks’ and ‘it depends who is on duty onnthe day’) that are causing me a lot of unexcesary anxiety as someone could just talk me through my questions and help me with some answers. She acknowledged that not knowing was causing me a lot of anxiety that was detrimental but wasn’t able to do anything. She said nothing I was asking about was unreasonable and I should write on my own notes my wishes, which is about as good as nothing. I hate how no one will help me and realises how much anxiety it’s causing me. It was exactly the same with dd, no one would listen to me or help me or give me answers.

It was exactly the same with dd, no one would listen to me or help me or give me answers

In which case @Reastie i would put in writing what you’ve just said here to the supervisor of midwives.

You sound like I did after my 16w consultant appointment - it’s the not being listened to that’s the kicker. It’s the knowing they can and that they won’t that kills.

This is why we need to keep talking as how will these folk learn HOW to talk to folk and to instil trust and to mollify legitimate fears without pushback.

It sucks, major major balls. And that’s without neverending grinding nausea. Good luck xxx

PaulHollywood I’m going to write down exactly my anxieties and questions and give it to my local mw next week (maybe I don’t express it well verbally and get upset quickly and find it hard to articulate) to see what she says about it and if she can see any way to help me. If not I will take up your advice and write to the king of mws. Did you just write a letter and address it ‘head of midwives’ with hospital address? But every where I face the same answer ‘I can’t say for certain, it all depends who is on duty on the day’ type response. Is this just what I need to accept and failing to accept it is my issue and IABU for wanting them to agree to specific (which I’m told aren’t unreasonable) things or should I be able to get answers?

Thanks Reastie! I'm more than happy to see birth choices mw and I'm prepared to jump through hoops if need be.

I'm sorry you aren't being listened to properly. I think it's extremely difficult for people who haven't experienced HG to understand the full gravity of the black hole it's puts you in! We deal with a lot of mental health issues in my work and it's taken very seriously, we're held accountable if issues aren't addressed. I find it shocking that they're letting you struggle on when it could be sorted!

It is to some extent about managing expectations @reastie

I mean, as you know they can only advise of the risks but what they can do is open up a two way dialogue and inform you enough so that you feel you can make an actual choice - not that you’ve been just told.

I put “supervisor of midwives” and “[my trust]” into google and up came the individual that I wrote to. I also cc’d the generic “maternity@“ email address too.