April 2015 Thread 11: The finish line is in sight as we get closer to maternity leave and our babies!

[BrixtonBunny]

Old thread getting full xx

Also moominmama22, our children's centre do specific groups for under 1's or non mobile children and in the early days it's up to you whether you feel up to going out but the group would be more for you than the baby. There are also bf cafe's which are great for meeting very new mums and certainly the one I went to didn't exclude ff mums even if many wouldn't consider going. There were toys for if you had older siblings and bouncy chairs/blankets/baby gyms as well as tea/coffee, biscuits and cake and lots of company in a church hall. One of the groups I go to has a separate room for babies and lots of helper to chat to new mums so they don't feel too lonely until they find their feet. They also have a lovely sensory room that only non mobile babies can use which is awesome , unfortunate with 2 or 3 other children to watch I'm unlikely to be able to shut myself in there with little man unless dh has a day off to come with me! Or perhaps I can get my childminder friend to come along and keep an eye on my boys while I spend 10-15mins in there with baby.

Cinnamon that sounds really good, especially the sensory room! I'm going to have to google nearer the time and see if there's anything like that close by to me

livvy nope the nearest NCT class is over an hour away and all the groups and things they do are all based in the city too. Driving into the city isn't just far, its stressful. I contacted them ages ago they told me they are hoping to start a group nearer me and that they'd help me set up something if i wanted..and then I heard nothing and then got an email just saying Are YOU still planning on starting a group? Yeah great I know literally nobody but leave it to me to organise this by myself? No support whatsoever so yeah NCT are crapbags in my area.
Is Sure start even a thing in Scotland? That community place sounds aaamazing cinnamon.

Im not meaning to complain, i do love where I live, ( in a wee Scottish glen surrounded by rivers and mountains and trees) and maybe when I find my feet a bit more I will be the one to start groups and things, but definitely not right now.

cinnamon that involves the effort of cooking things that are actually edible reheated though >.<

rl glad I'm not the only one thinking it's shrunk. roll on Thursday's scan >.<

squatting I'm like that on my right, doesn't matter how far into the bed I am, i'm convinced I'm going to fall out! Doesn't help hat I seem to have some sort of limb sticking out of my left side the past few nights, so I either hang off the bed or sleep on a lump!

moomin can i move in, i love love love scotland...

squatting it is BLISS! but one thing to bear in mind is the size of the matress, when we moved we had a tempur memory foam one that managed to squeeze round the narrow stairs (old victorian coversion flat) but when we bought a new mattress we ended up with zip and link ones as a big one wouldn't fit... but i actually like the zip and link... no doubt whose side is whose

and i don't feel DH as much when he turns and vice versa - handy as i am now as graceful as a beached whale

I am clearly a heathen when it comes to the milk debate as I only drink skimmed. I always hated full fat as a child when we were forced to drink it at break time at school, and now even semi skimmed tastes really thick and weird. I like my white water

Hope your scan goes well today cinnamon, and hope you're feeling better after a sleep Wine.

Thanks for the get well messages, I have just got up and eaten some toast and I'm going to have a bath because I can't get warm. I don't know whether I am ill because of the baby or just ill DH phoned and I cried proper snotty tears down the phone which is not like me at all, he is going to come home early but he said in the meantime did he want me to ring his mum to pop round, I declined the offer I'm not that ill
My Mum and Dad are looking after my Nephew today because it's half term so didn't want to bother them but I want my Mum, waaaahhh!

Hope your scan is ok this afternoon cinnamon

moomin is there a pool where you could do aquanatal or baby swimming when baby is here. I am doing aquanatal and have met more mums to be than at the antenatal classes. I go to puddleducks which is a franchise and my local class is at a hotel.

oh moomin and wine we did water babies, it was great fun and the ladies in our original group were super lovely, they just didn't live anywhere near us unfortunately, then I ended up having to move sessions when I went back to work and we i didn't really get on with the new group of mums, they'd already formed their little group and I was left out. It's quite expensive though, and the photo shoot was a bloody sham! but we used the £500 first baby grant thing to pay for her lessons totally what that was intended for i'm sure so in real terms it didn't cost us anything for the first 4 terms. we eventually stopped going, with the intention of going to the pool in the city with a friend, but I lost all energy for taking her to the pool in the city once my morning sickness kicked in :S Might see If I can bully DH into coming with the girls once bump is here (as I won't be able to keep an eye on them both at once)

Did waterbabies with DD I must say it was fine when she was small but I'm glad she's now old enough (3) to go to lessons by herself as she was getting pretty heavy to heft around by the time she was 2.5. And I don't have to get changed and go in with her - which rather explains the current state of my bikini line

wine, hope you feel warmed up after your bath.

I only use skimmed milk, but more from weight-control issues than anything else. Nobody's talked to us about milk yet...

Back from 31w appt - all well, no abnormal signs, blood pressure good, last set of blood tests fine. And baby is head-down, which is fab! Currently the doctor reckoned baby is back-to-back, which is less good, but given the amount of movement I'm getting some days, I doubt this is a permanent state of affairs.

Oh my goodness ladies, I think I've literally missed out from posting on about 4 threads and we're already on page 7 of this one! Posting a bit on the facebook group but finding it very hard to keep up! Will try to have a proper read through later on (between stuffing myself with pancakes!)

Just a quick one - is anyone interested in 2 tickets for The BabyShow in London this Saturday? DH and I purchased them on a special deal (22 for us both) but we now can't go which is a real shame as I've heard they have some really good show offers (we were hoping to buy Ewan) and talks.

I love full fat milk and gold top is even better. I'm a firm believer in eating natural fats and have happily got my parents to ditch the math and skimmed milk. I ate a whole pork belly the other day. Had to lie down afterwards though.
We only have a double so OH carts himself off to the spare room as my snoring is SO LOUD. Poor thing..

Any tips for first time fathers re: bonding with bump and baby?
I will be breastfeeding and OH is fully supportive but would like to know best ways he can bond. Think he feels a bit left out. I keep telling him how important he is to us and how his emotional support means so much but I think men like to be practically helpful don't they?

Ps hope u ok Wine; keep an eye on those symptoms

chicken he can hold the baby when your nipples need a rest after an evening of cluster feed (skin to skin as well)

he can help with the bath (not that mine liked it as he was afraid of dropping her)

he can pass you the baby when they are crying and need boob, he can change nappies, he can feed you while you feed baby...

don't worry! so many things...

Tiny that's such a good list for new parents.

I would add he can do the post feed burps, he can walk up and down and backwards and forwards to get baby to sleep. He can do things HVs wouldn't recommend like letting baby fall asleep on his chest. Men's chest are superior to women's as they're not 'bumpy' as DD puts it!

Not got any advice for you chicken but I understand what you could be going through. DH got a bit depressed once DD was born and took about 12 months for him to work out that it was because he felt left out because I bf DD. This time round he should be ok as we have DD that needs extra cuddles and attention so she doesn't feel left out and once bf is well established I'll have another go at expressing so DD and DH can get involved. DD wasn't interested in bottles or dummies but I'm hoping this one might be.

Lauren, my DD also never took a bottle or a dummy... we tried... but to no avail... straight to beakers at the nursery...

chicken there's all those nappy changes he can do :p

chicken, in terms of first-time dad-bump bonding, I can tell you what's working for us:

• DH taking time every evening and when we get into bed to stroke bump and feel any movement that's going on (I had to, er, verbally encourage him into this to start with, but it's now become part of the regular routine)
• us talking to the bump together at least once a day, usually to tell it that it is much loved and very welcome
• DH saying good morning to me and to bump separately when we wake up in the morning, and good evening to us separately when he gets home
• DH talking to the bump in silly voices (happened more towards the start of the pregnancy, it has to be said, and I suspect was part of transitioning into a comfortable space with the fact that bump existed)
• taking all purchasing decisions together - the only thing I've bought without DH's involvement so far are obviously 'me' things like maternity nightdresses, and a 3-pack of white newborn babygros from Mothercare which was something we would have bought at the weekend if a) we'd seen them and b) we'd worked out what the confusing usage of the word 'vest' meant in time.

Thanks guys. I feel for him because he is Mr Useful and Mr Practical. It's good to know he's not the only one Lauren. I will tell him about your DH, it sounds a bit similar.

Thanks Annia those are some nice ideas. I shall instigate them. We have nicknamed the baby, we do group hugs and I talk about the baby as in "(he)likes this" (usually food related as in (he) flips around when I eat. OH seems a bit despondent and I feel a bit bad as I hadn't given it a thought.

ah yes, in my first pregnancy DH also rubbed body butter on my bump every evening, but now this poor bump is neglected on that as I am too knackered and fall asleep way before him...

Ah poor bump Tiny. Yes it's easy to fall asleep atm staying asleep not so easy..

Tiny, I offered DH the chance to rub me down with shea butter regularly but he declined ;) I told him he wouldn't have a choice should it get a bit technically tricky, to which I believe he has resigned himself!