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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

October 2014 // thread 15 // hooray, here come the babies!

998 replies

sazzlehopes · 28/09/2014 16:35

Going through these fast at the minute!

OP posts:
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SweetPeaPods · 04/10/2014 09:02

Goats I was wondering the exact same thing this morning. If you could choose to have the pessary but decline drip and go straight to c section.

fedupofrainydays · 04/10/2014 09:04

goats my baby was hiccuping a lot before he came out. And his lungs and breathing are fine even though he was almost 4 weeks early.

Is there anyone medical you trust to talk this through with? Everything varies in each area so I don't know. I do know is that not many areas let you have a c section because you want to - there needs to be a medical reason. Your anxiety / fear could be one but they would want to discuss this with you first

ohthegoats · 04/10/2014 09:21

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely don't want a C-section. The aftermath of that for me would be very difficult mentally (trapped at home essentially, being close-but-not-close-enough to friends and family, but not able to drive - that's a nightmare for me).

But I don't want a 50+ hour labour that has to involve an epidural due to my tiredness/pain level of drip, resulting in a C-section or theatre instrumental delivery MORE than I don't want a planned C-section.

Out of 11 women I know who have been induced at my local hospital since I've been pregnant, 8 ended up with a c-section anyway, the others all had theatre forceps deliveries (and had been prepped for C-section). I get that this is anecdotal, but there is nothing to suggest I'd be different - especially since I've found the obstetricians in conversation to be bossy about all this stuff.

Of course I understand that if I go naturally into labour all of the above could happen too, but I think I'd be able to deal with it better mentally if I'd let things initially happen by themselves.

The problem with this stuff is that there is no one to give you an unbiased opinion. Doula's have said just don't turn up to the induction appointment. An independent midwife says don't turn up to the induction appointment. Midwives here at consultant appointments don't really give opinions. A consultant anaesthetist friend says 'If they are wanting to induce you, then don't delay - it's for a reason' (except I don't believe that from my experience of speaking with consultants here). Who else can I ask?

I'd pay for a C-section if I knew that the induction route would be long and painful and end up with one anyway. I'm just trying to work out at what point I need to go down these routes.

The problem is with all of it, is when I'm at home and thinking about it, I'm very reasonable and able to talk about it logically. When I'm in front of medical professionals, I just want to cry. Which doesn't help my case really!

ohthegoats · 04/10/2014 09:23

Sorry to be long and rambling, I just need to organise my thoughts so I can enjoy my (probably last baby-free) weekend, and know what I'm going to say on Tuesday. I still reckon the baby will be here on Wednesday, not for any reason... I just reckon that's when it'll be ready.

Me23 · 04/10/2014 09:31

goats yes you can accept pessary and go on to refuse the drip and opt for c section. It doesn't happen often but I have known women to do this and it is perfectly within your rights to do so. Nobody can force you to do anything you do not want to. I really think you could do with talking to a supervisor of midwives their job remit is to support you and they have leverage to put specific plans in place. I don't think they get used enough to be honest as many women don't realise they have access to them. They work 24/7 so if you rang today you should be able to talk to one.

ohthegoats · 04/10/2014 09:39

Me - great, thanks very much. That's helpful.

YellowWellies · 04/10/2014 09:39

Argh I thought the trippy dreams ended in pregnancy after putting Lilla down after a feed about 3, I woke up about 10 minutes later panicking that I'd not fed the baby I'd had this week ie had decided I'd had two babies a week apart! Shock

Goats I'm not sure what to suggest in terms of how to opt in / out of elements of the induction - its so hard as everyone involved has a vested interest or bias. One thing I would say is that not being engaged and having a hiccuping baby isn't a sign they're not ready. Neither of mine engaged beyond 1\5 until labour and J was still hiccuping on his way out. Hiccuping can be them drinking the fluid and also an early indication of reflux if its prolonged. The lungs are cooked at 36 weeks so at 40+ weeks don't worry about it from that perspective. I think maybe its a fear that you're not ready to be a Mum that's making this a head f*ck? in which case just try to remember that no one is and we're all winging it!

Shirehobbit · 04/10/2014 09:49

FWIW, I've not known anyone stick to the no driving for 6wks, post-section thing, goats

mrsb87 · 04/10/2014 10:02

Well I've learnt a lesson this week. I ran out of my ondansatron on Tuesday. I hadn't organised a repeat because my baby should be here by now therefore I shouldn't have needed any more. Steadily every day this week I've been sicker and sicker, today I feel like crap again. Think I need to get another prescription sorted today :-( would not have thought at 40+5 I'd still be throwing up!

ohthegoats · 04/10/2014 10:06

I think maybe its a fear that you're not ready to be a Mum that's making this a head fck?*

Nah, it's a fear of all medical professionals/hospitals/medical procedures. I've had no positive experiences of them, and just don't trust them. My knees go wobbly just driving into the hospital car park. If I thought I could have a homebirth, I would have, and would have been much, much more comfortable with the whole thing. Now we're getting closer to the bit I have no choice about having as a medical 'thing' I'm needing to get my head straight on it.

binkybunny · 04/10/2014 10:12

goats and me that's good to know as I was discussing the saw thing with dh this morning. I have 2 weeks until my sweep then an induction will be booked for 5 days later. I really don't want a long induced labour to end up in theatre anyway, which does seem to happen a fair bit at our hospital from what I've heard. I'd rather just go straight in for a cs to start with if it gets to that point.

My aches and pains just feel like they are going on forever and not really developing, so I might still be here in 2+ weeks!

Missus2ndwife · 04/10/2014 10:20

Goats - can you ask your doula to go with you to your next appointment? That way she can ask any questions you struggle with and help empower you with the knowledge you need

ohthegoats · 04/10/2014 10:31

In conversations with my doula up to now we've basically decided that I'll say yes to all of it, and book appointments for things to happen - just not have them happen on Tuesday. But then go away and think about it before either not turning up, or whatever. The thing that concerns me about that is that there are higher risks for older women with placenta issues after due dates etc. So I want to be able to have the options of monitoring or whatever. Again, I'd happily pay for that to happen privately if they're going to be really sniffy about it all.

My doula is mostly about keeping me at home for as long as possible due to aforementioned hospital fears. And then having her there to help boyfriend deal with me when I get panicky. The actual thought of having an epidural and not being able to get up and run out of a hospital is the sort of stuff I have real nightmares about. I get that it's irrational, but most fears are to some degree.

ohthegoats · 04/10/2014 10:31

But yes, that's a good idea. I'll talk with her over the weekend.

FlipFantasia · 04/10/2014 10:59

Goats I'm glad you're expressing your fears/plans here. You've had great advice. I'd add stuff like read NICE guidelines, print off questions (including a preamble, eg I have a phobia of being immobile so an epidural is not an option) and systematically work through your list. Bring DP and doula (strength in numbers). DP in particular needs to go, as you need support (I have been through a 41 week 'book an induction app' and found i one of the most stressful ones ever). Start a thread in childbirth to get even more perspectives:'/advice.

Try to remember that your experience will be unique to you. You have choices (you can insist on expectant management/monitoring - I was comfortable going to 42 weeks and then felt induction was safer). Supervisor of midwives is a great approach (I spoke with one when planning my vbac).

An NCT friend had a planned section at 42 weeks over induction as her cervix was unfavourable. We were at the same hospital and this wasn't presented as an option to me so it shows you can get what you ask for.

Also, birth is often not as bad as you expect (I planned a home water birth with my first - we had needed IVF to conceive. And I wanted as little medical intervention as possible, which meant fighting protocol along the lines of all IVF pregnancies are consultant led and induced by 41 weeks). I ended up delivering by crazy emcs at 42 weeks following induction and feel positive about it as DS and myself came through it beautifully (I'm actually very proud of it since it saved his life...).

Also the cervix is wonderfully mysterious so can go from 'unfavourable ' to fully dilated in a matter of hours.

Ok, ramble over! Forgive typos. I have an iPhone 6 now and am hating the predictive function in the MN app (it keeps trying to make me add awful emoticons in the middle of words!().

Bumpandbaby2014 · 04/10/2014 12:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LondonJen · 04/10/2014 12:38

Yes, thanks everyone, I also didn't realise 3/5ths is the most engaged you'd get before labour. Why couldn't my mw just say that?!

Sorry Robin but admirable that you for gave it a go.

I'm still having bad pains in my pelvis and getting quite cranky about it. Carpal tunnel also back with a burny vengeance. Feel like my whole left side is broken. I have clearly reached the physically painful whingey back end of this pregnancy now.

Any news Sweet?

DP drove me to Asda this morning but I had to go in and purchase my own seive. Wimp!

Sorry you're having the sickness again MrsB.

Goats hope you're finding some answers as you work through everything. I'm not quite as far along as induction thoughts but need to work out when/if to book earlier sweeps. MW suggested Fri but I'll only be 40+2. Have appt booked already bang on 41 weeks. Up to me if I want to wait till then. I think that 41 weeks would be fine. Except that here'd be a weekend after that though so wouldn't be able to get a 2nd sweep (if didn't work) until 41+5 which is leaving it a bit late as last day Birth Centre will accept me is 41+6.... hmmmmmmm... Torn between not wanting to start 'things' too early but potential for regretting not trying everything before 42 weeks.

ohthegoats · 04/10/2014 14:49

Thanks everyone for your input. I'll have a conversation with my boyfriend about this before Tuesday and see where we end up with it. He'll just want me to not panic, and that's impossible to predict - I have to have IV sedation for a dental check up, so you know, my panic levels in medical situations are pretty low.

bumpbangbump · 04/10/2014 14:55

I'm afraid I have no experience of induction or cs so can't offer any salient advice. I did have a very successful hospital birth experience and can only really say that it can be positive. I even ended up with a spinal for my tear repair and it was totally fine. Quite bizarre getting people to lift my legs...

Saying that, I plan to reject an out of hand induction. I hope to go naturally like I did last time but would much rather go in every day to check everything's OK than be induced. Ask me if I still feel this was next week.

40+2 here and have now lost what must be my whole plug. This never happened last time... Why did no one mention how bloody much of it there would be? It just kept coming! Lost loads yesterday and then another big globdule again this morning.

Still no contractions or anything so who knows when I might get started.

Bumpandbaby2014 · 04/10/2014 15:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lily31 · 04/10/2014 15:43

So, whilst DP is busy building large Hemnes drawers and the cot (he has been upstairs for 3hrs already poor man), I have been baking. I am a lazy cook and have been feeling quite inadequate when hearing about all the batch cooking and baking a lot of you ladies have been doing. I am impressed by the way - I couldn't personally cook a whole load of meals to then put them in a freezer, I am a see food, eat food person.

Therefore, I have resorted to buying packet mixes and baking these for anyone who might drop by post-baby. Only takes 5 mins of mixing time then in the oven and voila.

Totally sinful, but lush... www.thelondoner.me/2011/06/slutty-brownies.html

Not sure whether they will actually be going to guests. Might just keep them for me and DP to get us through long feeds and sleepless nights.

I know a lot of people are anti packet mix, but for those who aren't Grin

STIGZ · 04/10/2014 15:44

So strange... After asking you lot about any boob changes last night, my left boob was leaking colustrum this morning Confused just a wee bit but it was so strange to see it again! ... Is this a sign of labour approaching ? Or wishful thinking because... I really really want proseccoSad

Lily31 · 04/10/2014 15:52

I think someone else had been asking about colostrum too Stigz. Personally, I've been leaking it on and off the whole way through so it's not been a sign of anything for me. I think it seems to happen when I go through hormonal changes.

Getting used to using breast pads before bubba is here is a bit annoying and totally doesn't help to convince DP to DTD Hmm. Oh well, I've been able to try some different brands so there's always a silver lining...

It could be a sign for you though, if you've not had it regularly.

puppythedog · 04/10/2014 16:29

All these DPs afraid of dtd. Fools, I don't need convincing, just allowing Wink

Lily31 · 04/10/2014 17:17

puppy would you have words?