September 2014 - Babies are starting to make an appearance!

[lilone1234]

A few babies have already arrived, with more due to make their entrance soon, and it's not even September yet!

ella you can start bouncing whenever, it's recommended for helping with back pain during pregnancy. Towards the end it just helps by helping baby get into the best position, so wont really make any difference unless you're ready to go into labour soon anyway.

cookie sorry I can't remember but how early was he? I tried to BF two of mine who were born just before 36 weeks but gave up because it was just too difficult, the strong sucking reflex required for BFing is the last thing to develop before birth. I didn't even try with DC3 because I knew the odds were against me, and I've said this time I'm not trying unless I get to full-term. Honestly if you need to FF just do it, nobody will judge you and it's far better to have a happy mum and baby than a hungry baby and an upset mum struggling to BF.

Welcome jem!

cookie I'm sorry to hear you're feeling down about bf'ing. I already know i'd feel the same if it doesn't work out for me and am already trying to reassure myself that's it not the end of the world if I can't but it's so heavily advocated by so many people, and particularly the NHS, that it's no wonder mothers end up feeling this way. But as Ella and Jem have said a more happy and relaxed mother must be good for the baby, and as long as he is getting well fed one way or the other that's what matters!

What I have been trying to tell myself to prepare for if things go wrong is that you can't pick out people in the general population who were breastfed vs formula fed, if that helps at all!

I'm 37+5 today and also very ready for this baby to come but I don't feel like she's in a rush - no sign that things are moving along. I haven't really tried anything to move things along though. I'll sound very grumpy and critical here I know but there are so many things that are supposed to get things going yet we still can't give birth on demand?! I'm just having a general grump today i'm afraid!

Went to a breastfeeding class at my hospital on Friday, they make it sound so easy don't they?! Honestly no woman in my family has been able to do it, I have one friend who managed it & even she said it was hell in the beginning. I bought a steriliser set (just in case) but I'm pretty sure I'll end up FF. My neice & nephews were all FF & are the happiest, healthiest children, no asthma, no eczema. I was FF & there's nowt wrong with me! I can imagine when it's my turn, I'll feel just as disappointed, but must remember this time doesn't last forever, we should congratulate ourselves on making a beautiful little human & spend this time enjoying them not beating ourselves up. We are all wonderful mothers whether BFing or FFing xxx

Hi all, I am so sorry not to send you updates for such a long time; we are both OK now and I will send you a longer birth story shortly but in summary my little boy decided to make a dramatic entrance; when born he went directly to special care but they couldn't stabilise him so transferred him to another hospital intensive care unit- for us, it was very stressful but these little tiny babies are so strong, he recovered fast and we were eventually discharged yesterday after a long time from hospital...

Here is a little photo from yesterday in our way home

oh naz its so lovely to hear good news from you, we have been so worried. Im so happy for you congratulations xxxx yes do update birth story!

totally agree deard, I really drives me crazy when people discover they cant BF or have real difficulties for whatever reasons that people then beat themselves up over it. Its as if we have let our kids down and we dare not admit it as we will get slated for it. I wasn't breast fed and Im fine! I did bf my ds and he has asthma & eczema, bowel issues too....so go figure. All I did is end up being bullied by health visitors and my DH (because he was bf and of course it is best!!) into keeping on with it when I simply didn't produce enough milk = hungry baby = crying =no sleep = pnd. We go through such a lot a when we have a baby who on earth needs the extra pressure, do what suits you.

Sorry I have a bit of a bee in my bonnet about it. Im all for BF but im also all for FF it all down to whats suits you as family.

nazly sorry to hear you had such a tough time, but glad you and your lo are home!

thank you for all your support, I really am struggling and would love to give it up, and just do ff. But I really would like to get to his due date just to see if that makes a difference!

Oh and dh is having a nap cause he is tired! He is not even sleeping in the room with us!

Cookie, honestly don't stress. It's not worth it, really. I tried to BF with my first but my milk never really seemed to come in properly and he was always hungry and I ended up switching to formula after about 2 weeks.
My second ds was entirely BF for 6 months. I have yet to spot a single health difference between them!

I echo Whiteblossom out. out. out!!!! He seems to have his feet permanantly stuck in my ribs, which is so uncomfortable, plus with the contractions going on for weeks and weeks I am done! I'm 36 weeks today so I know technically he'd be prem, but all the professionals think he's a good weight already so I'm not too concerned. I can't do this for much longer!!

cookie You're a better woman than me to be letting him nap. I'd certainly have other plans!

nazly So good to hear from you! I'm sorry that you've had a stressful time of it but really pleased for you that your little one has recovered well and is now going home.

nazly good to hear from you and glad you have your baby home now, congratulations.

Glad to hear from you Nazly & lovely to hear you have baby home now xx

cookie just to say I agree with everyone else - if breastfeeding really isn't working for you then don't put loads of undue pressure on yourself. How you feed your baby isn't an indication of how good a mother you are. Interestingly I spoke to a friend in the week who exclusively breast fed her first and told me she won't be doing it again with her second (she's due soon too) as she felt he was hungry all the time and woke on about an hourly basis through the night for month for more feeds, which nearly gave her a breakdown. She found it an enormous relief after several months when she started mix feeding and giving formula as well as the occasional breast feed, and both he and her were much happier. Maybe if you're not quite ready to give up yet consider a compromise for now and mix feed as well for a while and see how it goes. Would give you a chance to get some sleep as well whilst DH did some of the feeds.

Nazly it's good to hear from you. Sorry to hear you've had a rough ride of it lately but thrilled to hear that your little boy is now recovered well enough to come home. It must be an enormous relief for you. xxx

Great to hear from you Nazly. Sorry to hear you've had a tough time, must feel fantastic to have brought him home today. Hope you have a good first night.

Cookie please don't worry about breast feeding. A number of my friends have struggled on trying to crack it & got themselves so worked up that neither they or baby are happy & as soon as they switched to formula everyone was so much happier & they'd wished they'd switched sooner.
You've done the first few days which is the most important.

There is a very high chance that I physically won't produce any milk so have got a steriliser etc ready. I'm going to give it a try but if I can't then I'll switch to formula straight away.

cookie Don't give up! You're doing the best you can. As said, first 6 weeks of bf are the toughest. You both need to learn.

Not everyone has it easy from start, but have a faith. You both will find the best way eventually

Cookie - sending hugs. One of my best friends is a (very good and caring) GP with 3 dc under 4 and she says it makes no difference if you bf or ff.

Nazly huge congratulations, hope you're both doing ok!

Hi cookie I just want to say you are amazing! Breastfeeding can be so so tough, if I can suggest anything it is that you get some good support with whatever feeding choices you make (from someone with 'feeding' in their title) - i.e. a breastfeeding counsellor (nct are good and may do a home visit, their support is for however you choose to feed) or your hospital infant feeding specialist midwife. In my personal experience, I trusted advice from mws which was basic and not suitable in my specific case and actually caused more problems that were then impossible to escape from.

Wanting to breastfeed, but not being able to due to insufficient help is devastating (it certainly caused my pnd) and often not recognised as often it is assumed that you made a choice to ff or bf, but often the 'choice' to bf isn't really there at all it he right support is lacking - this blog explains my point more eloquently than I can, and at the bottom are some helplines if you want to get some more support www.bestdaily.co.uk/your-life/blog/a592143/the-depressing-truth-behind-mums-unable-to-breastfeed.html
Has anyone suggested a supplementary nursing system (SNS) to you? This is a bottle with a very thin tube you tape to your breast so the baby gets the milk whilst still simulating more milk production in the breast - I don't know if they are suitable for preemies but I used one with DS.
I combi fed from 3 days due to undiagnosed tongue tie plus my PPH affected my milk coming in - feeds were painful (because of TT, they shouldn't be if latch is fine) but I felt such a failure that I convinced myself I deserved the pain because I was unable to ebf, they were very dark days. I was taking fenugreek tablets, eating oats and pumping after feeds to increase supply. I also used an SNS for formula to keep him at the breast. I set myself mini goals, just this feed, just today, just til the weekend, just til this drs appt. I actually combi fed til 20 weeks this way, which still feels both a great achievement and a huge disappointment that I was never able to ebf.
The emotional elements of BF are so complex when coupled with physical issues too; some good, practical and unbiased advice in person might be helpful for you, whatever you choose to do. Xx

Congratulations nazly on your little boy! Hope you are both well.

I'm still firmly in the legs crossed camp, I'm hoping for around my due date (10th September) as DH has a massive work project to complete very beginning September! and I have loads to get sorted at home.

Cookie there are all kinds of ways to be a great mum. I hope things get easier on whatever you think is the right path for your family.

Jem welcome and thanks for posting that article. I found it really thought provoking!

Nazly I'm so glad to hear that you are both OK now! We were worried about you.

Nazly!!! Yipppeeeeee and congratulations. He is lovely.

Cookie, from what I can tell from my mummy friends bf, ff, both as good as the other. Loads of them went from bf to ff and wished they had done it sooner. Thinking about you.

We have Come away with some friends for a 'last hurrah' weekend. Has been lovely EXCEPT we have a bath only. I can't sodding fit in it comfortably. Then I got a v sore back. THEN I had terrible stomach pains all day.....trapped wind and constipation, anyone? And am Knackered so have spent the weekend sleeping and having early nights. Am v boring person.
Back to work on tues and have asked if can start ML a week earlier due to ELCS date and also being Knackered. Waiting to hear.

The joys of pregnancy,hey?

Good to hear from you nazly sorry to hear it's been so stressful, glad to hear you are all home & enjoying each other. Congratulations!

Good to hear from you Nazly. Your baby boy is a little cutie, hope you have a good first night at home with him.

Good to hear from you Nazly Congrats!! Sorry that you had a tough time but your little boy looks super cute

cookie I'm finding bf so much harder than I'd imagined it would be. Just do what is right for you and don't worry about anyone else.

Just doing a night time feed at the mo. Need some zzZzzzZzzZz soon though!

Up feeding baby....

Yay glad your both well now nazly.

Cookie I was struggling and even more so because ds wasnt weeing enough. Im now pumping and getting close to2oz could you do that? I really want to carry on and it's easier than actually bf!

Congratulations Nazly!! Glad to hear you're both ok Very cute photo!

Sorry to hear you're having a hard time of it with the feeding cookie. It is really, really hard to start with, with dc1 I had bleeding nipples, mastitis, toe curling pain, no sleep etc. for about the first 6 weeks and then it all seemed to sort itself out and it became really easy and comfortable and we carried on until 13 months. It is just a really annoying, soul destroying thing that the first weeks are the hardest, when you are at your most tired and I can totally see why a lot of people choose to ff instead, you have to do what is right for you as well. If you want to carry on I would just keep putting Elijah on the breast as much as possible, with lots of skin to skin, so he gets used to that position more and more, he doesn't have to take any, but an excuse for a good cuddle anyway If it helps (and if you plan on anymore eventually) I haven't had any problems with my other 2 and feeding - fingers crossed no.4 will behave itself...

Had my anaesthetic appointment at the hospital today ready for my C-section next week, makes it all seem very real and close!! Had my iron levels checked, talked through the process on the day with a midwife, and told when to come in (7.30am at mo) got weighed, and then anaesthetist talked through the spinal and effects with me, everyone was really lovely which was great. It does all feel a bit surreal at the moment though, does anyone else feel like this?!

Horrible night last night, poor ds1(4) got in bed with me about 1.30am, then projectile vomited everywhere and got totally freaked out by it, then did the same in the bathroom so lots of fun changing sheets, cleaning bathroom etc. before finally got him resettled in my bed (with DH in ds1's) but couldn't sleep as every sound he made I was worried he was going to be sick again... Then when I finally got back to sleep poor dd (6) did exactly the same thing in her room, and managed to cover everything (sorry tmi). Felt so sorry for them, and luckily they are feeling better today, but I've now got the biggest mound of washing to do, along with scrubbing walls etc., and all I want to do is sleep!