November 1014 - thread 5 - the rainbow collective romping (and limping) into 2nd trimester!

[weeonion]

hi folks - thought we should have a new thread!

I'm hoping to breastfeed too but am aware that these things don't always go to plan, so will just have to see what happens I guess. Am very keen to give it a good go though.

Welcome to all the newbies- send me a message if you want to join our facebook group too!

Can't remember who said about the itchiness but I have it and it's awful. Always at night- legs, arms, everywhere! Driving DH mad!

16 + 1

Ageism - I get my fair share! We got married at 20, had our son a year later, we own our business - we are responsible but ppl tend to act like we are naive err well we're happy!

Breast feeding- yes!!!! I say hang on till week 8 that's when it got easier for me, and most of the women I help as a breast feeding counsellor. The womanly art book is immense! Made mothering make sense to me! I breastfed E through reflux, dairy & soya intolerance & we night weaned at 27 months and finished at 33.

My biggest tip is to give yourself tons of grace, take small steps and ask for support from either your local bf groups usually in sure start centres or charities like LLL , breast feeding network etc. I made a goal for 6 weeks, then 3 months then 6, then 12. My ultimate goal was 2yrs.

I am nervous number 2 might be tricky to nurse but I know where to get support!

Omg, radio silence on MN! Everyone must be out having Friday night drinks. Mocktails of course.

i wish... just been sat watching the thunder and lighting for an hour :-)

DH bought me one of these home, 2.8% alcohol, may be my new Friday night treat, missing a cheeky cider!

Breastfeeding wise... I am definitely going to try again. I found the first 2 weeks awful, toe curling pain and was very tearful but we cracked it and then it was the easiest thing in the world. Went to nearly 14 months in the end.

Twiglet I expressed from week 1. I'm not sure it's advised but just sharing what I did... Had a very cracked nipple and wanted to keep up my supply so expressed on one side until I was able to feed from that side again. As my supply got established I had a bit of an 'over supply' and would feed from one side in the mornings and express and freeze the other.
I have contacted the local milk bank recently to make sure I know what I need to do and get the right tests done to become a regular donor and make sure if I have extra milk (fingers crossed) it can be helpful.
I had a drawer full in the freezer last time and donated it privately to another mum but would like to do it through a milk bank this time if possible.

Hi everyone, I've been off MN for ages because of being really busy, and then trying to catch up with the thread which had about a million messages since I last read it. I had my 16 week check up yesterday, and it was amazing to hear the baby's heartbeat, and also the sounds of it moving around and the placenta. I found it more mindblowing than the 12 week scan, and I think it really made DH believe in the pregnancy. He was all emotional for the rest of the day (so I'm glad I made him come!) The baby was wriggling around like anything and it took the midwife ages to get the heartbeat, but I'm glad it's lively and having fun in there.

I'm really impressed with the care I'm getting at my GP surgery actually. The doctor and midwife have both been really switched on and sensible, great at sorting out any bureaucratic hitches in the system, and actually treat you like an intelligent person and don't patronise you.

I'm also finally starting to look as though I might be pregnant rather than just fat round my middle, which is quite nice as I'd been feeling a bit self-conscious (and yes, I know that's silly, but I guess like lots of women I'd spent ages thinking about my figure). I'm finding it quite liberating actually just eating cake or whatever because I feel like it. Rather than thinking "oh, I shouldn't really" I'm enjoying thinking "screw it, I'm going to get huge anyway, I might as well have that nice thing I fancy eating".

Petal what pump did you use, may I ask? I need to get one because the one I had last time was already old and second hand (from a friend) and it was pretty crap. Yeah I expressed from about 6 weeks, not regularly, maybe one feed a week? I never got that much out though but we were lucky in that DD was fairly OK with an odd bottle - much more so when I went back to work PT when she was 4 months and I had to send an expressed bottle with her to the childminder. However, I think my milk had (has?) excess lipase or whatever it's called because it went off really quickly once expressed :( It tasted absolutely rank after defrosting and only lasted about 24hr in the fridge. So I subbed the expressed milk for fomula after about a month and DD was fine with it. She would never take a bottle from me and wasn't always great at taking it from DH, but loved her daily bottle at the CM!

I have to say though I'm delighted that DD got used to a bottle early, I found expressing stressful and unpleasant. It sounds like it's the perfect solution all around but just trying to find the time to express a feed was sometimes beyond me...and as for having to take apart and clean the bloody pump...

No Friday night drinks here but I really felt like a glass of cold white earlier...sigh.

Today was a looong day. I still feel like my patience with DD is at a lower threshold since I've been pregnant, but it's probably just that she's in the full-blown terrible twos. DH is out tonight so it's nice to have a quiet house, though I want him to come back so that I can go for a walk. I got a box of chocs yesterday for my birthday and ate 80% of them today, on my own. Gross.

I used a Tommee Tippee manual pump, £12.99 in Boots at the moment so just got myself a new one! I think because I was lucky and had a bit extra I didn't need to much prompting/vigorous pumping. Was debating getting an electric one this time but I used that pump last time nearly every day for over a year and it was fine so hopefully will be again.
I got DD used to a bottle early as well as I was reluctant to feed in public and sometimes took an expressed bottle with me if we were out for a long time. I know the advice is to establish breastfeeding first before introducing a bottle as the technique is different for the baby.

We have a medela swing; they are brilliant, easy and I'd recommend in a second if you think you'll be using it a lot, but not as cheap as a manual. We waited until 4 weeks to try bottles but he just didn't take to them, and as bf was just easier (and I'm maybe a bit shameless about it in public,) I confess we didn't try very hard.
He is fine with a bottle now before bed, as we had to wean at 12 months in order to try for dc2, and of course he'd had plenty of time on cups by then so maybe that helped. I'd like to be able to get this one used to a bottle though as dh rather missed out on feeding ds. We shall see.

I bought a second hand double lactaline electric one and saved £££ by doing so. They are pretty good. I only used it a couple of times a week for DS1, and then hardly at all with DS2. However my next door neighbour borrowed it for her baby, and bottle fed him expressed milk for six months, so I would recommend a lactaline on that basis alone.

I agree with whoever said that they found the hassle of having sterile bottles and pump at the same time as a well fed baby and a breast full of spare milk hard to co-ordinate. DS1 just fed ALL THE TIME, so there was rarely much spare milk available. By the time DS2 came along, DS1 was 2.5 and I was very busy. It was far easier to quickly breast feed him and then get on with everything else. As a result DS2 never got used to a bottle. So we gave him sippy cups from about 5 months and that worked out fine.

My experience of breast feeding was positive. They both latched straightaway and seemed to know what they were doing. They both gained weight from the off, so never had the worry about whether they were getting enough, or whether my milk was 'good enough'. I fed them till 15 months and 18 months and managed the first 6 months exclusively. BUT it is still one of the most demanding things I have ever done. For the first few weeks the first 30 seconds of each feed was toe curlingly painful. If you are breast feeding it really relies on you to be there day and night (obviously, but the reality of this is different to just seeing it written down). I realised early on that there was no point waking DH in the night as there was nothing for him to do. It was a bit lonely at times. Having said all that it is something that I loved doing and something that I feel proud of.

With this one though I am definitely planning to get a bottle introduced earlier, and I think I will buy some formula in cartons in order to avoid the pumping faff described above.

Not in the best of moods this morning. DH got a phone call at 4.09 AM from his Dad saying that he can't find their airline tickets, for a flight that leaves this morning!!!

It then took the best part of an HOUR to explain that BA haven't issued paper tickets in years and the document they have is an E-ticket. FIL is adamant he had a paper ticket and we explain the reason he can't find it is because it doesn't exist! After some raised voices from both DH and I he starts to accept this fact, but is still adamant he needs a further printout to take to the airport. I explain they only need their reference which is on their docs and also on the email on their phone; both PILs have iPhones which they can barely work at the best of times.

BUT they still want a printout out of something as MIL doesn't trust of believe things in computers! What they actually want is their boarding pass, which I had already explained they will be collecting from the airport as requested when I did their online check-in.

BUT NO, they want it now in their hands. Our printer doesn't work and neither does theirs. DH was then going to drive 40 into work to open up and print said document, triggering all manner of security alert at head office when unlocking the premises at silly o'clock Luckily DH was spared this as one of them had already called his cousin -another 40 mins away- and woken him up to print it.

On the whole PIL are lovely people, but their lack of knowledge of technology can be so frustrating sometimes. Now to salvage my day and sneak in as many naps as I can, whilst PIL are off happily flying in the sky.

Rant over anyone! Nearly punched a hole in the ipad typing that. Do they not realise how precious a pregnant woman's sleep is!!!!!!

Oh dear BrandSnob. Poor you. Making me feel better that I got woken at 6am (slightly more reasonable hour) by husbands work phoning him due to lift out of action - felt like grabbing the phone a screaming what do you think he can do about it a 6 in the morning!

On the plus side it's half term and the morning sickness finally seems to be going (now 15 + 3) so now I've had time to go back to sleep for a bit am feeling quite chirpy about the day ahead. Even the rain isn't bothering me.

I hope to breast feed so it's very useful to read about all your past experiences.

Just thinking ahead to the 16 week appointment...will anyone be taking their partner? Mine has the day off and him to feel left out by not inviting him along but not sure if it's the done thing!

Hello everybody!

So glad everyone is doing so well, been a bit quiet lately but been trying to read up!

Your talks of breastfeeding are terrifying me! Kantha I had no idea expressing would be difficult! In my head, I would start expressing straight away so DP couldn't 'bottle out' (excuse pun!) of feeding baby but now it sounds like a hastle! Mind you bf itself doesn't sound much easier! eeek!

Just had my Downs test back at 1:8200 so pretty damn happy with that! I might get a doppler, it seems to be calming you all and everyday I keep waking up thinking 'Is it still in there???'

Do we have a facebook group now? I would love to join as facebook is my little addiction! If someone could post a link I would e very grateful!

Happy birthday to the birthday girls for yesterday, hope you had a nice relaxing day.

Also,,,,Twiglet, saw you mention about a virgin strawberry daquiri? DO tell! I want one sooooo badly!! xx

Polkadotscarf I am also wondering that, what do they do at the 16 week appt, would he just be bored?? I don't know whether to leave him to work!

Hi Ladies , please can I join your thread? I'm due 28 Oct but a lot of the October thread are due end of Sep and early Oct so am finding that they're waaaay ahead of me.

Morning all!
Poor brandsnob - a definite lazy day for you after that start!!

I agree with intensity of bf. I remember hearing about feeding every 2 - 3 hours, not realising that meant it may take 1 hour to feed her, then change, then settle and then she'd be ready to feed again. Little space or time!! I had been independent and found it v hard for a while to be constantly on demand. She would never take a bottle which meant for at least first year, i was never away from her for more than couple of hours..
That sounds negative but when I kind of accepted that and went with it - was lovely. I bf everywhere and soon got over reluctance to bf in public. By the end - couldn't really give a monkeys what others thought of it and tbh never got really neg. reactions / tutts.

Welcome Oklahoma - congrats to you! I'm due 25th oct and occasionally hop over to oct thread to see what's slightly ahead!

Amy etc - my 16wk appt was at home with homebirth Mw so possibly different than hospital?? A review of plans, talking over worries etc so not much different than earlier ones. Dp took dd out to park so i could get peace - dd wanted to be "right" in there!! I guess it depends on you / him. I want dp there for 20 wk scan (in 2 weeks!!!) and the last appts though!

DP came to my appointment yesterday, I thought that was normal?

I plan to breastfeed for a month then express a few bottles for dp to give after that. And then we can share feeding.

Welcome to all the new people!

Brand snob what a nightmare!

Don't think DH is coming to my 16wk appt which is on Friday. I would rather he saved the time off for when the baby's here, and the next scan. However it is my birthday and I think my mum will be around, so I might see if she wants to come and hear the heartbeat!

Hi everyone, I've been so busy and just caught up on the thread!

Welcome to the newbies!

I have another newbie mum question - what do babies sleep in?! I'm thinking of buying a cotbed, which I think it is a cot which can be converted into a child's bed, so would cover ages 0-5ish? But is that what the baby would sleep in during the day as well as at night, or do I need something a bit more portable so I can keep an eye out during the day? I'll need some kind of travel system thing anyway, which seem to come with a detachable carry cot, so would the baby sleep in that during the day? Or do I also need a moses basket?

We had a look in toys'r'us and had a bit of a meltdown at the options!

bunny- it depends what you can fit in your bedroom! if you can fit a full size cot bed in great but i had a basenette for the first 3 months as we couldn't fit a cot in our room.
we also used the basket down stairs and when visiting family travel cot for sleeping in.

Welcome Oklahoma and other newbies. Great to hear all the bf stories and that it isn't a horrible experience for all.
BrandSnob, I can so picture that phone call. How irritating. Hope you snuck in a rest today.
Polka dot, I don't think much happens at 16wk appt but my DH comes to all my appts with me as he isn't working. Depends what kind of DH you have as I think a lot would be bored at this one. Not exciting like 12wk or 20wk. Some get to hear the heartbeat others haven't depends on the MW.
Amylou, you need to private message Tigsy or send her an email at [email protected] to get connected to FB.
My choc cravings are still as strong as ever as is my desire for nana naps. I thought we were suppose to be getting more energy during the 2nd trimester?!
I don't know if you remember me clearly stating to my parents that DH and I wanted the first 2 weeks after birth being just us then they could stay with us for 2 weeks. They have now emailed to say that they are coming for a month (from Aus). They will stay at an apartment for the first 2 weeks then come stay with us. Hmm. Why do my parents still call the shots when I'm 35?

Bunny - We had DD in a Moses basket next to our bed until she was 5 months to the day (she's only little!) We then moved her into her own room into a cotbed. During the day if she had a nap I had her downstairs with me in one of the bouncy chair thingys (the ones on a 45 degree angle) or on the sofa next to me.

Venus - I'm still so tired and still feeling sick every morning, waiting for my energy to come back and start blooming!

Having worked in an antenatal clinic for many years, most women don't being their partners with them for bog standard appointments. They are generally at work. The men who do turn up are mostly in work uniform and look like shift workers who have just finished/started work so haven't needed to take time off. They do however bring their mums/sisters/friends. If your DP has the day off anyway definitely bring him, but don't worry about him taking time off work to be there. Save his time off for when you're overdue and can't fit behind the steering wheel.