RM OCTOBER 2014 thread - Today we are pregnant

[TinyTear]

Hi
This is a thread for people due in October with past miscarriage issues, so we don't scare the 'regular' October people and we don't annoy the RM thread with our pregnancy talk...

TinyTear MC May 2010, MC June 2010, MC November 2010, DD Jan 2012, MC October 2013 ADD 6th October

Tayto erm that email needs to go to HR. If you are having surgery (bar cosmetic) it's medical NOT annual leave. Even more so, if you're pregnant you're allowed more medical time off by right.

Ugh tayto that is def not annual leave worthy!! It's not a holiday?! Necessary to keep your pregnancy. Silly boss.

jbrd glad scan ok but annoying about harmony test.

I think there is much more than a fine line between friends not knowing what to say and just ignoring you!! wandering that's a terrible reaction from so called friend. However hard she is finding it to talk to you I think that makes a crap friend to be honest. I've forgiven many peoples silly words and comments to me and outright ignoring I'm not sure I could.

Really paranoid day today. Think I'm about 9 plus 3 and symptoms seem to be going. I know this can be normal but am really scared. Debating getting another scan at 10 weeks as not sure can wait til 12. I just don't feel as tired or sick, hair has stopped being so greasy and teeth stopped bleeding. Feel it's some weird connection to my maternity exemption come through the post today. I've had a few of those i have thrown away now long before the expiry date :(

bugs I wish I had a solution to this worry and fear, I really do. I always wish there was a fast forward button from conception to newborn. That would be amazing.

Dear me there are some tales of folk with no tact, nor empathy with others on here. I want to reply to this topic properly, but right now I'm stressed because I'm getting abdominal pains. I'm 7 weeks tomorrow. I lost my last baby at 7+3 ish. No bleeding, but there wasn't last time either. When I lost the last baby I was doubled up in pain, couldn't walk and was pouring with sweat. Just now I'm just a bit uncomfortable. I know I'll have to call a midwife/doctor but since it is late at night, how normal are twinges/mild pains during early pregnancy? Any advice very much appreciated

So sorry to read that you are stressing too Rainy. I hope you get good news x

Hey wandering from around 6 weeks for me up to around 11 weeks I had cramping and sometimes pain (period style) off and on. I worried like mad and it always set me off thinking the worst but I'm not 14 w on Friday and so far so good. Doesn't mean that I don't too get mega paranoid a lot of the time. I think I will for the whole pregnancy. But anyway it is normal. X

Talking of friends that say the wrong thing I have been let down by several mates over the last couple of years as I embarked on this journey and x3 mc's. This is why we still can't being ourselves to announce this pregnancy, as I can't bring myself to untell people.

buggerlugs I am so sorry you are feeling so down about this pregnancy - believe me I do know how you feel and why you are worrying. It's clear that to draft the text in your head is a kind of self preservation but know that it won't make it any easier of this doesn't work out - so some positivity right now could also be good for you. You honestly can't know what is going on until the scan, honestly this really could all be fine. I think the FB leaving plan is good. I chose to leave as a new year resolution and i know it has made this preganncy journey so far alot easier. I dont feel in nearly as much competiton and/or upset at stupid peoples comments. I think facebook is bad news in general. I have loved being off it. I am sending you positive vibes lady. xxx

jbird great news on the scan!

tayto your boss sounds like a knob.

Hey everyone else!

wandering hope u r ok. Mild pains and twinges are pretty normal,especially if they come and go. I get the very occasional pain in my side, but it goes away and I think it's pretty common. Fx u will feel a little better tomor.

fedup I think pregnancy is meant to improve hair - so having less greasy hair is probably a good sign! Maybe the fact that the exemption came today is bringing up emotional memories too. Hopefully your symptoms will be more noticeable again tomor;-). Keep well in the meantime.. And I'm all for reassurance scans if u can get one when u need it.

pickle I think 8 weeks should be a good time, as you should see a heartbeat then. And it should provide reasonable assurance. But maybe others can advise.

buggerlugs sounds like a very difficult time for u. And it must be a very long process with Ivf etc. have u considered any counselling at all? I find it helpful - in particular it's a good space to articulate anxiety but try to look rationally at the present - where all is going well. I find it helpful to acknowledge the dual narrative - worry but also hope. As tum says, it is an understandable defence mechanism to downplay hope - but hope is also very important to keep u going. And I think I may as well be hopeful - if this doesn't work out I will feel very upset irrespective of whether I am hopeful or not. So I may as well try to be hopeful! Perhaps some counselling would be helpful if u haven't considered it.

Thanks all for supportive comments re goon boss. I certainly won't b taking time off from annual leave, and I might take the extra day in spite! Though that usually would not be my style. But I guess sometimes u need to put itself first. I'm chalking it down to her lack of experience. Goon.

Gecko yeah I had twinges, cramps etc'. It's muscles, uterus, even bowels all jiggling about in there. Give the MW or GP a ring to put your mind at rest though, that's why they're there.

Fedup I had that but all was well. You're in week 10 (because you count up to the week and reach it when you've done it all) my MW said that was expected in many women. Mind you I did have a 10wk scan so if it puts your mind at rest go for it!

Got my 'pregnancy' (as opposed to APS/injection-but-really-pregnancy-but-too-early) risk assessment today. Wibble. Another non existent jinx.
Also a lovely (MC/infertility with a kid, hence I told her early for moral support) friend got her maths wrong and asked me about movements. Luckily I didn't freak out just said "Im only 13+" and she was like "oh yes, you don't feel anything until after 15 or 16 weeks" WHEW. Silly panic averted.

Wah! Just told another pregnant lady at work "me too" about something! She's discrete though - was just like 'ooh'. How very "YOLO" of me!!

squiz. I have told the people in work that need to know. I will hopefully be 19 weeks when I go back after this sick leave and if things continue to expand I won't be able to hide it anymore.

Just told my friend who I was worried about. She had already guessed and congratulated me. We had a chat about how rough it is on the journey, which was cathartic. :)

Feeling very, very greedy right now - bought a fried buttermilk chicken bap at the local street food market type things. There was an option of having that with half fries and half mac 'n cheese. So I did.... It was delicious but I bet I'm hungry again in half an hour.

Today I am mainly worrying (aside from tomorrow's early scan and how I'm convincing myself there will be an empty sac) about the fact that I am rhesus neg and forgot to mention when I went to the GP to say I was pregnant. Will that be OK to tell the mw just at booking in or should I have mentioned it already??

Would anyone else go to a reassurance scan on their own? I have booked one for tomorrow now as really stressing it's not ok. Symptoms have gone as said in previous post. DH can't come with me so going solo rather than move to next Friday. Am I mad? I was on my own when found out about last mc and coped but this one is different as seen HB and everything. I will be between 9 and 10 weeks.

squiz glad went well with friend - that's great news

I think you should mention r neg issue catty but it's not urgent. I don't know much about it though so don't listen to me!

jbird great news. Pleased for you xxx
fedup good luck with scan. Hopefully it will put your mind at rest x
squiz sounds like you have a good friend there. Think good friends will understand that we deserve this after everything we have been through. A bit of jealously is natural but my friend who is having issues TTC can see how this is so difficult for me and how I am not taking anything for granted.

So my private scan was fab!!!!!! The baby was wiggling about and even waved at me. Measuring 15w 1d but am still going off my nhs scan date- 14w 5d. Just like the idea of an extra few days. Have another scan in a week but the private scan was worth every penny!
We have finally decided when to tell people. We will tell our mums on Mother's Day then everyone else the week afterwards. We will be 17w then. Have another private scan booked for week 18 and we are going to find out the sex. I think it might make things more real.

Bad news- the placenta is at the front so won't feel movements till much later on than average. I guess the paranoia is here to stay.

Hope everyone is having a good day :)

catty good luck with your scan. Think you need to tell them about blood group as you might need some injections in case the baby isn't- I think. Midwife mentioned this at booking in but I wasn't really listening as knew I wasn't. Tell them then. You could always mention it when you have your scan.

catty I don't know about your blood group but all I think of is your lunch! it sounds yummy.
milly so glad your scan went well. What is your due date? it must be around the start of sept same as me?

Well I've booked a scan for tomorrow and my mum can come with me. I just need to go to as I'm rubbish about listening to my own advice re loss of symptoms. Been a mess today.

Glad scan went well milly looks really positive for you now and at least you know why you aren't feeling movement when you might expect, but no doubt would still cause worries!

Milly I had that with my dd did still feel quite a bit. Congrats with scan.
Fed up glad your mum is coming with you, hope scan eases your worries tom.
I don't feel pregnant today just fast from all the comfort food!!

Felt quite a bit.

Catty I'm rhesus negative too, has your partner been tested too? Turned out my dh was too, what are the chances.

fedup I feel great apart from the worry and the tiredness. I stopped worrying (well sort of) about lack of symptoms after last scan. My friend who is pregnant has had none at all and everything is ok. Please try to be as positive as you can. God I sound like my hubby now!!!

My logic is if I have a scan tomorrow and everything is ok, then at least I know then a loss of symptoms for me doesn't necc mean something is wrong. And if there is something wrong, at least I'm not waiting to 12 week scan to find out having spent 3 to 4 weeks worrying about it. Obviously the latter will break me but would rather face it now than later on.

I was massively craving a cheeseburger earlier though so ended up having two from mcdonalds

Fantastic news milly! And great to be so far along.

Good luck tomorrow fedup hope u have a good experience and feel reassured for a few days!

Great that people are feeling more confident about sharing the good news! I told two colleagues/friends today too. Though i did add that it's still relatively early and there is a lot of uncertainty in coming weeks - nice to tell people but I wish I didn't feel I had to add the last bit!

Oh well, another week nearly down for us- good luck to everyone with scans in the next few days!

Nearly my due date is 6th sept (3rd from private scan). When is yours? Xx

hope the scan goes well fedup
milly mine is 2nd Sept. It feels very unreal and far away.

Hi guys my due date is 12th sept so we are all fairly near each other! I am thinking of booking another private scan. I don't think I can wait that long. My NHS next scan is not until the 29th April (anomaly scan). When are yours?