January's new May thread

[MrsFooCough]

All of us May mummies are BACK like the Terminator only less deadly (unless preggo rage strikes and we're within waddling distance of sharp things)

Stats page

Baby size chart

Have a , some , and TELL US EVERYTHING ~listening intently~

The jogger brand is not avaiable in NL., so no chance for me buying it.

moomin In my experience they don't induce before 40 weeks easily because of all the complications that can arise (and they don't work half the time if it's early anyway) You can have an elective c section on the nhs of course, but you might have some convincing to do, depending on your doctor/consultant. It's defo something to speak to your midwife about. She could have good advice to help you.

Thanks dobe. Really wanted to avoid C section but the thought of this carrying on for another possibly 13 weeks is enough to change my mind!

It depends if there's anything actually 'wrong' in the pregnancy. Unless there are risks to you and baby they won't induce. IME they won't even discuss it before 36 weeks anyway.

will they discuss c-section before 36 weeks? doesn't seem like very long to leave it

It's quite rare that they'll agree to induce or do a c section especially early because of the complications and risks to you and the baby. I had pre eclampsia with ds and still, I didn't get induced until week 41!
Unfortunately suffering with pain or whatnot in pregnancy isn't enough of a reason to make them do something like that - the risks of inducing or emcs early outweighs the benefits of it.

It does seem though that around 30 weeks everyone seems to have a wobble. You're in the 3rd trimester so getting very sore, tired and huge, but there's still almot 3 months to go! Apparently it gets a bit better in week 32ish (according to the gospel of MN)

I do feel for you though. I can't even walk for 2 minutes without wanting to cry in pain and I can't imagine another 12 weeks of this. But it will go fast - It's what I keep telling myself! xxx

I was told I was having an elc with first cabby until week 33 where I moved area and consultant and was then told it wasn't procedure. I got induced with pre eclampsia when I was bang on 39 weeks and I had spent about 6 weeks in and out of hospital! In my experience they will probably just ignore any requests for elc and early induction in the nhs sorry moomin

Most people I've spoken to who are having ELCS are having them around 38/39 weeks I can't carry on like this

Ah see now I'm having my elcs at 37 weeks no later than 38 because I'm diabetic so there's medical reasoning behind it.

Moomin u can only speak to doctors at next visit! U don't always see a consultant, or 9 times out of 10 need to ! Registrars have just has much knowledge or "power" so to speak in opting for elcs!!

Ask to speak to the doctor at next visit! At least if it's in notes then they can't say u didn't ask

Have you called your midwife Moomin? I have zero experience but I have heard that people who are having ELCS usually meet up with their consultant at around 36 weeks to arrange it.

Know that you are under consultant care for other reasons, but if you speak with your midwife and explain why you want a C Section then they may be able to get the ball rolling with making sure you speak with the right doctors for that.

someone said only named consultant on my notes can approve things like that which is why i thought i need to see named consultant

i know usually the appt to arrange it is at 36 weeks but i didnt know if i had to ask about it before then to try and get approved. scared if i waited till 36 weeks theyd say sorry you left it too late to ask

I have been advised regarding c section from the start of pregnancy and still doing everything I possible can to get out of it. They seem more pro c section in UK than both DK/NL, so hoping next week when I am permantly in NL, that they will be less pro c section, although my partner will prefer me to get a c section. He is to scared of me not being able to give birth without hurting myself. I have a heart condition, which means that to much strength is not good and I can and have fainted in the past. Still hoping for natural birth

I think your midwife would be a good place to start. Agree that leaving it until 36 weeks to mention it would be late in the day. Like Bornin said, if you ask them it'll be recorded that you've requested it, and they'll know the pathway in your area.

No, a registrar can sign off on induction/c section before hand. Only time I've ever actually seen my consultant is the morning of my induction with DD2 when he popped in to introduce himself and say he's there if anything goes wrong, which it didn't so I never saw him again. You don't really want to be induced with your first dc, it tends to be long and tiring. If you've got scar tissue already they may be reluctant to do a c section, what have they said about it up to now?

If your itching turns out to be OC you'd be induced at 37/38 weeks anyway.

thanks for advice everyone

so far all they've said about scar and adhesions etc is "It probably won't bother you during pregnancy"

I don't think it is OC as it's described as 'intense' itching... whereas this is more like... 'this is annoying, make it stop' itching if that makes sense? Think it's just a reaction to something.

I desperately don't want induction or c-section if possible... and if someone could guarantee me that I'd go naturally by my due date, I'd be absolutely fine. Not having that guarantee scares me. Honestly I'd be happy with due date... but the thought of being left until 2 weeks over, even though it's "only" two weeks, is making me feel sick and I can't quite explain why

Afternoon! Please can I pick the brains of those who are having their 2nd/+?

How're you planning to introduce your elder DC to the baby?
I've read (prob on MN!) that it's akin to DH bringing home a new wife, and to tread carefully! DS turns 3 two days after my due date.
Most popular idea seems to be to get DH to bring DS to see me first, then bring the baby in after. And get DS a present 'from the baby'.

I'm also wondering about ways to keep the baby safe from DS's marauding - just bought a Bababing Rocker from John Lewis, it's not tippable, locks into a static position, and folds fairly flat so we can put it behind the sofa when not in use.
We'll keep the Moses basket downstairs too, as we'll use the BabyBay upstairs (co-sleeping cot), then the big cot in DSs room.

Any suggestions?

I've always spoken lots about the baby before hand, the little ones kiss the bump and say 'aww baby' etc. Then after the birth they're the first ones to see the baby but never in the hospital always at home in the bouncy chair so they can say hello with me pretty much out of the equation.

I don't give gifts from the baby as the baby is for all of us.

I make sure that the older child's routine doesn't change very much at all and that before each feed etc they're set up with snacks/something to do before hand and keep a story book/colouring pens right next to me for when they get bored so I rarely have to tell them that I can't do something because of the baby. Probably sounds awful but I would much rather set the newborn down to cry for 30 seconds whilst I sort the older child than breed any kind of jealousy.

I wouldn't have a Moses basket downstairs with my 3 yo, he'd be trying to climb in with the baby and the potential for it bring knocked over if on a stand are huge. Bouncy chair all the way for me, our one doesn't bounce so much that baby can get 'pinged'.

Not sure my pelvic floor can cope with much more coming down with a cold and can't stop sneezing and baby is jumping up and down on my bladder so it hurts!

It's a bit different for me because there's a 9 year age gap. But ds's dad has just had a new baby with his wife and ds is convinced their baby is their favourite. So I'm trying to be sensitive to ds.
Obviously the baby is going to feed a lot and sleep on me a lot in the early days, so I've been talking a lot about when ds was a baby and all we'd do all day is sleep on the sofa with him sleeping on my chest and feeding him. I keep talking about all the presents he got as a baby and all the people who came to see him. I'm hoping that he won't think because the baby gets all this attention because he's favoured, that he got the same treatment. If that makes sense.

We also keep talking about "our" baby. The baby belongs to ds too. And we've involved him in everything. He was the first person we told I was pregnant, he kept the secret for as long as we did, and he's been to scans and appointments with me. That's how we are handling it, hopefully it won't backfire!

Thanks Xavielli! :)

We've been talking about the baby tons, DS asks to see him (ie my belly button) all the time, gives him hugs and kisses, and has started talking to him and showing him stuff too! "Look my nee naw baby bruffa" etc.

Fingers crossed we won't be kept in Hospital long this time, was in for 6 days total last time, that'd be really disruptive for DS. My mum's agreed to come down and stay if necessary.

I totally agree about 30secs of baby crying being better than letting any resentment develop! Got to get myself organised and try to avoid saying too many Nos.

Our Moses basket stand is pretty solid, but as DH is a carpenter I might get him to knock up something completely immovable! :)

Oh and not that you can do anything about this one til baby arrives but I always perfected the rugby ball hold for feeding first so that there was always an arm and a knee free to cuddle another small person. :)

Xpost dobe!
I guess it must be equal parts harder & easier with a bigger age gap - my sis always told me the great thing about her 20/22month ages gaps between her three DC was that after a few months they'd forgotten the new baby hadn't always been there, but of course she had six straight years of nappies too!

We deliberately waited til DS would be 3 as his behaviour is soooo strongly linked to his verbal skills - last year we had massive problems with him biting and being aggressive because he couldn't explain himself. He's so much more verbal now, which is a huge relief!

Good tip Xavi! :)

When I had DD2, DD1 was just turning 2. We had told her all about the baby coming beforehand. Her grandparents brought her into the hospital to meet DD2 and she loved her. Although she was odd with me for being missing from home for 3 days when I came home. That was quickly forgotten.

Now we talk about the 3rd coming and will just do it the same way as before.

I got this book to read to the toddler.

dobe I was just thinking, do you think your DS would like it if you gave him/put up one of those double picture frames, with a pic of him as a baby next to one of the same-stage new baby?
It must be hard for him to wrap his head around, esp with his dad's new baby too. Sounds like you're prepping him v well!