Martians 2014, thread 11. KEGELS!

[LyraSilvertongue]

Shiny new thread, ladies :)

Yes, Liberuna. Some lurky fucker is stalking me and they think I don't know who they are. I wish they would simply Buzz off.

Thanks all for the birthday wishes - shares round virtual slices of cake.

While I'd normally agree no presents mean no presents we've done this on previous birthdays and he's had a right strip about not getting anything. Sighs I'm just tired have taken to waking at 1am and not beig able to fall asleep again.

The boss just came back to check if I have eaten his banana yet. I have not, but I will do it immediately! And it's very nice thanks

Yeah, a week off would be fecking awesome Pram but sadly I was off for the entire month of August with morning sickness and now I feel I owe work big time. I'm planning on a long weekend away with DH at the end of the month for our 10 year anniversary, but I don't dare ask for a day off when I've barely put a day in!

Oh dear on the being banned front. My bet was on it being automatic, as if it weren't you would have been banned again in your new reincarnation, but now I see you have...

Pram, I scraped a 2(ii), had a couple of temp jobs that a monkey could've done before doing a PGCE and then couldn't get a job so just did bits of supply work before getting ill because I was pregnant. DH crashed out of the first year of what might have been a good career and spent a while afterwards not doing anything. Now he works as a gardener but because he has an BSc and an MSc, he still gets people telling him he should "use his degree" when in actual fact what he does suits him as a person overall better than any job using his degree would. So you can hardly say that we are great financial or career successes but IMO, as long as you have enough money to live on then it is more important to have the right balance in your life and be doing something that suits you and your family rather than to be some top notch professional on a high wage and it sounds like you thought carefully and made the best choice for your family. For some people maybe having a career is the best choice for them and their family but it isn't the best choice for everyone and it isn't automatically "better" than other options.

And whilst I did have a vague career plan in mind before I had children, I know that I would never have found it as enjoyable and fulfilling as being a mum. Not that it doesn't have it's bad days etc. but overall I find it very rewarding and I feel very thankful that I get to stay at home with my children all day.

F&T I hope your tarte tatin is nice - DH made one yesterday with the children although for some reason I haven't seen it yet.

Fox, I never felt particularly attached to or excited about my two before they were born mainly due to how ill I was (and the second time also because of previous loss) but it totally changed as soon as they were born. I still can't understand how it is possible to love someone so much even when they are too young to reciprocate but it does happen and it is totally amazing.

Well, loads and loads of yucky stuff has come out of my boil so I'm now not having to take painkillers (was on paracetamol and codeine and it still killed) and am feeling very relieved that it's not going to need any surgical intervention. Am going to see GP on Monday though as these antibiotics are making me so ill that DH is having to stay home to look after the children and he can't be staying off work for a whole ten days!

Fox bless you. You need a well earned break and some good food made for you to keep your energy up.

Joll I may have missed it but did the interview go well?

MTB yay on the new house. Sorry your bday wasn't as good as it should have been.

My side is still really hurting. I can hardly move and it's killing me just to breathe. I'm so tired and my nose is blocked. I've had enough of this pregnancy thing.

BWP, thank you for sharing your story. I do feel blessed to be free of the rat-race and all that nonsense, I just sometimes lose my vision for a moment or two. Thanks for reminding me that the choice not to work is a valid one and not one taken solely by the arseholes on Jeremy Kyle. I love reading your posts

By-the-way, I had a boil on the very edge of my arse ring in the weeks I was undergoing IVF. Extraordinarily painful fucker. I didn't want antibiotics interfering with the IVF drugs so I simply tolerated it. However, it disappeared pretty rapidly of its own volition after a couple of feisty squeezes of the little bastard in a red-hot bath. Where do these things come from??

Just to add to this, I left York where I had quite a lot above starred/double first grade because to me it was just a waste of time and I didn't feel fulfilled at all, I hate the pressure to go to uni or you're deemed useless, I have met many many graduates who I would never in a million years employ and equally the opposite way around! Swings and roundabouts just got to figure out what's best for you. I'd rather live a simple life working in a nice little cafe or something than join the rat race, some of my friends would find that thought horrifying!

Just noticed badly has put it much more eloquently than I could have!

BWP Thanks for the encouragement but sadly have been unwell today so backside has barley elevated from the sofa, except for the squillions of visits to the toilet empty my bladder.

F&T

It did indeed go well Mummy, tganks for asking.

Though I've had horrendous back pain for most of the day after so fuck the weekly shop

To add to the degree/qualification malarkey, I went to Uni at 19yrs old, did an art degree, worked in call centres for 3 years afterwards, then decided to retrain and am now a midwife, if I'd not come back after first Uni to where my parents are I'd of never met my husband and if I'd not retrained as a midwife I'd still be stuck in a job I hated and not have met my best friends who I have now. Don't get me wrong I still have crap days at work but overall, it's great and I'm glad I decided to be a student again and slog hard for 3 years, being skint again, unfortunately means am still recovering from the debt of 2 degrees! Oh and paying for a wedding and now a baby on the way, I don't ever seem to plan things sensibly! But then why put off now what will still be the same in the future!

Sorry having a self pitying day regarding how skint we are at the minute, just wish there was a miracle way out of debt!

I'm going to bed as soon as ds friend is picked up from their play date. I have no tolerance today. I'm in pain and I'm pissed off. Dh can deal with bath and bed tonight.

Are there any rubby gel type things I can get OH to rub into my back that aren't ibuprofen based? I really am in quite a bit of pain

I would have thought an ibuprofen gel would be ok as very little, if any, would get into your bloodstream.

Thanks for sharing about your boil Pram - I've actually been getting them for months as I just don't seem to be able to get rid of them no matter what I do. Have stopped taking the antibiotics as I started throwing up because of them and I'm not convinced they're actually doing anything and am going to try to see the Dr tomorrow morning complete with the half dozen other boils I have. I do know where mine came from though - I got them from DH who had them for a while but refused to go the the Dr until he'd given them to me. (When he got them he was on some medication which can make you more susceptible to skin infections which we presume is where his came from.)

Trying to catch up on the train on the way home - dodgy signal not helping...

Fingers crossed regarding the interview Jolleigh. I had an interview lined up early doors in the pregnancy but I wimped out on the basis that I would be about 6/7 months pregnant when I started the job. Not sure I made the right decision but a bit late now. My boss has been really supportive in my current job so that is a bonus.

Prambo - does MN not tell you why they are kicking you off? Hope it can get sorted out soon.

Pregnancy rage erupted at work today. Must learn to take a deep breath and rise above annoying twats rather than emailing and calling in a moment of rage. Turning the other cheek was never my strong point.

Sorry - happy birthday MTB!

Faster, you will have to join the facebook group if you want to know more It's safe to say I am mumsnet's Most Wanted

BWP, boils suck cock. Poor you having several It sounds like you're seriously run down.

Moosey and & Madwife, I seriously envy your career choices, degree or not. Moosey, I saw the panoramic view of your apartment on facebook (the one you are leaving) and you have done seriously well for yourself. And only 23! Good for you.

Th'usband came home an hour early and I am delirious with happiness. Chucked my arms around him like he'd been gone for a month. What's all that about?

MummyPig, I am so sorry you feel wretched. Where is the pain and what can be done?

Braised pork chops with shallots again tonight with goose fat roasties and champ.

Lyra, how are you today? I forgot to tell you that restaurant you want sounds proper kitsch. I love irregular-shaped rooms and rickety stairs and intimate spaces. How fab to have your own business

Imeg and Saggy, how are you both?

Ok so I am 4 weeks out of date but... Catching up on Midwives. It's the one about natural birth, birth centres v delivery suites etc. It's filmed in the hospital where I had DS, the pool I was in (there is only one!), waiting room, delivery suite etc. Very weird.

Ok - how do I join the Facebook group? I'm caving!!!

Right , so work is so crazy haven't made it on thread since Monday but been trying to keep on Facebook. Tonight made conscious decision to do thread, not f/b but now I'm going to have to do both with Pram's mystery comments.

Nearly fell off settee laughing at random network guy's intrusion and Pram's response. Who the hell would stumble on our thread accidentally, read all of our random chat, then comment on a conversation about Joll's ex from pages ago.

Rasp send a message to greymoose, she'll sort you out!

raspberrys send me a message with your fb link and ill add you!

Btw loving the new thread title Lyra - every time I moved on a page I automatically squeezed.

Apologies if I am commenting on conversations from pages ago. Pram you sound in a better place now with it all. I did the whole education/career thing and have honestly been planning how to backtrack from current position since DS was born (and this was someone who did 3 interviews for a top job at 37/38 weeks pregnant and never would have believed I would have felt this way). I read your posts about side-stepping the rat race with envy at times as well and think you have your head screwed on. I'm taking a year's mat leave and will probs not return to the same post after that but take a demotion - I really want to rebalance things towards what matters and that is my family.