Graduated Elderberry Pavlovas - Thread 7

[Cavort]

Newly diffed right through to new Mums. A thread for the over 30's expecting their first baby.

I really can't imagine how hellish it would be to have a baby with colic. Even the small bouts of unexplained crying we've had are so frustrating and distressing.

Advice always says look out for your baby's cues that they are tired or hungry but I found they are very easy to misinterpret. For example, Elodie will continue to suck her fist when she's had enough milk but is tired, so I used to assume she was still hungry and put her back on which resulted in her getting distressed at the breast and me wondering WTF I was doing wrong, and by the time I had finished wrestling her back onto the breast she was completely overtired and screaming. Needless to say we had a few interesting weeks until I worked out she just wanted rocking to sleep at the end of a feed. So I think you should take advice with a pinch of salt and work out what your baby's individual cues are because I have a freaky baby who sucks her fists when she's tired as well as hungry. Damn these babies for not following the manual!

Just been on the scales and I am 2lbs lighter than pre-pregnancy so I appear to be losing 1lb/week despite eating loads of crap more than normal. I am loving this breastfeeding diet.

nice work cav!!! I need that diet, I am starting to feel like a bit of a walrus, I am fine when up walking around or sitting but getting out of bed sucks big time! I dread to think what I am going to be like by my DD in 9 weeks, or even worse if I go overdue, which no doubt I will.

I am due to start pregnancy yoga on Wednesday and actually can't be arsed, think I need to though as I want to feel more prepared.

Hazle have you tried tummy time with something wedged under Vic's chest? I have just used a rolled up towel and put a mirror under her face and Elodie managed about 5 minutes instead of the usual 1. She also kept hold of her rattle when I picked her up which is the first time she's done that. I feel like the developmental changes are coming thick and fast now.

Miles loves tummy time and has got a really strong neck I think as lots of folk comment on it. But he has literally no idea what his hands are hey Ho, I'm sure he'll catch up on that front with time!

Ok, bit concerned. I've not felt baby move so far today, at all. I'm wondering when I should start to get really concerned? I know they say that baby moves less as space decreases but I'd expect something, a twitch or a roll or something? Don't want to be a crazy panicking preggo lady but this is a bit out of character.

don't panic, I had quite a few days like that too. But they always say that if there is change in usual movement pattern and you are concerned, it's always better to get checked out.

Felt a couple of mild twitches after lots of poking and proding, will keep an eye on it and if still concerned will nip into the docs on the way home. May go and OD on sugar and see if that gets him wriggling.

How many weeks are you mother? If over 28 and concerned then call triage. They were very helpful and understanding with me when I called worried about that. I was 39 weeks!

has anybody seen Brave recently by the way?

Thanks ladies, I'm 31+5, I'm feeling little movements now after lots of prodding, not the usual strength though. I may well call triage on my lunch break and see what they say. Thanks so much, was freaking out a little bit who am I kidding, a lot!!.

Whenever I had that (happened quite often) bottle of full fat coke and a lie down helped. But as everyone says if you're concerned at all just call the hospital. I'm sure they would rather see 99 people that are fine as long as they see the 1 person who might have issues...

Well I phoned triage, she was not impressed that I didn't have my hospital notes on me. She said I should always have them with me, why on earth would I take them to work each day for 9 months? I also struggled to remember my community midwifes name which p*ssed her off too.

She told me she wasn't overly concerned but that I should go home, drink iced water, lay on my left hand side and monitor his movements, if I am still concerned I have to call them back and go in for monitoring. What sucks is that they only offer the monitoring at the doctor led unit where I would be giving birth which is an hours drive away, why can't I go to my local hospital for monitoring? They have a midwife led unit which must be able to handle monitoring?

I can't just go home as my boss is out of the office, I have been down to one of the local restaurants and got a pint of ice so I will be drinking heaps of iced water and shall stay sat at my desk as quietly as possible and see what happens.

The ice seems to be working as I can feel little movements, nothing huge but I can feel him moving around so feel a bit better.

Are you feeling more movement now Mother?

FFS it's not like you can carry your notes around in your handbag, they're massive! The only place I ever took my notes was on holiday to Newquay at 34 weeks. I was never that far away that I couldn't get them on the way to hospital.

I know it's a ball ache to drive an hour for monitoring, but it really is worth it even if you have the slightest concern. I don't mean to scare monger but I just want to highlight the importance - I hadn't felt much movement so I phoned and went in for precautionary monitoring. The trace showed a bradycardia indicating the cord was squeezed or trapped, so 20 minutes later and having not had a shower or even a wash that morning I was in a bed on the CLU having my waters broken and 8 hours later I had a beautiful healthy daughter. If I hadn't been neurotic enough to phone I dread to think what the outcome might have been.

Hi cavort yeah he's a bit more awake now, had some kicks and rolls so feel much more at ease. I am glad I called though and if it happens again I will definitely remember the ice cold drink tip. I was so worried, I really did think the worst for a while. I am going to go home and lay quietly for a while and hope my little man perks up a bit.

I would definitely travel over if I was really concerned, I was more annoyed that if you're really worried you have to travel for an hour rather than nipping 15 mins down the road.

I'm glad it's not just me thinking she was being stupid about the notes, I will make a note of my hospital number when I get home though just in case I need it in future. I can't believe she thought I would take my notes to work everyday, that's like expecting you to take them to the shops with you or pop them in your back pocket when you take the dog out. Totally unrealistic.

I was told to carry my notes as well so in the last few weeks I just left it in my car. But having your hospital number does shut them up helps.
Yeah ice cold water tends to help! But glad he's moving now. Like cav I had a sweep and was told baby was distressed when I went in for monitoring, and she was born the next day.
Lara's been feeding like crazy since yesterday. Think the dreaded growth spurt is upon me. But at least she still slept 6 hours straight. So I need to count my blessings.
Question: are you all coping on your own during the day while dh at work? My mum is here and after a rocky start she has become incredibly helpful and I'm dreading her leaving at the end of the month. She's already been here 4 weeks (came after end of dh paternity leave) so I've not had any time alone

At first I struggled to get anything done all day bar looking after the baby. But now we tend to get out to do things for miles (baby classes etc) or me (meeting friends for lunch) most days. I also manage to cook tea and/or do washing. In short - you get used to being at home on your own very quickly. Don't panic! Oh and slings really help!

Lol everything is a lot more hassle than it used to be, but we're managing fine now. Elodie has 2 or 3 longer naps during the day so I get plenty done then or go back to bed myself and she is happy in the bouncy chair while I get stuff done so long as she can see me. I can have a shower while I am alone with her but I generally prefer to wait until DH is around so I can take my time and relax a bit without worrying she is going to wake up or get grumpy in the bouncy chair. My bath or shower is my daily 'me' time.

It might be an idea for your Mum to start gradually taking a step back before she leaves to give you an opportunity to see how you get on. Like Janey said, the first few weeks on my own I hardly got anything done as I gradually learned how to get by with a baby.

A question for you ladies with babies... do you have to do something to get your baby to sleep (feeding, rocking, cuddling, stroking, etc.) or do they self-settle? Elodie will generally self-settle after a night feed when she is already drowsy, but not at all during the day. If I don't decide for her that she is tired and needs to sleep and do something to get her to sleep (generally 5 minutes rocking with a dummy in) she will just get overtired and grumpy to the point where she's screaming and then it takes ages to get her off to sleep. The only times she will self-settle during the day is sometimes in the car or pram while they're moving. I don't really mind settling her to sleep but as she gets older I would obviously like to be able to put her down and leave her to sleep.

I'd say it's 50:50 in the day with Miles. Sometimes I have to feed and then cuddle him to sleep, but other times I can tuck him into his Moses basket and leave him, and he will generally be asleep within 10-15 mins. At night, as you find, he's fine. In the daytime I think there's either too much to look at, so I have to rock him, or he's so tired that he falls asleep in my arms before I get chance to encourage him to self settle.

So yesterday we felt like awful patents as we thought Miles had burnt his cheek a bit. It seemed odd as we hasn't been outside, but at one point he was on DP sat near our patio doors, and we figured maybe he had burnt through the glass. This morning it was back to normal. However it's back again tonight and given it's been pissing it down all day he certainly hasn't been in the sun today. So I started wondering... For the last week he has been gnawing on his hand all the time, and his poo has been slightly more liquid than usual. Please tell me I don't have a teething baby this bloody early? I'm sure he's not, but the one red cheek thing is curious, no?

If I put her in her basket during the day when I know she's tired she just starts screaming within minutes. I need to stop being so soft (I enjoy the nice sleepy cuddles ) and start putting her down on her own.

It certainly does sound like teething or there is a condition kids get called Slapped Cheek which is probably worth ruling out.

Hmmm, no fever and is only one cheek. Never heard of that though so will def keep my eye on him...

DSD is always telling me about horrific-sounding conditions her mates at school have got, most of which I've never heard of but I suspect we'll all be getting better acquainted with them in a few years time.

Do you think his gums are hurting? My Sis was telling me about this miracle teething gel she is putting on Nephew's gums which numbs them for ages. I can't remember what it's called but I will find out.

Thanks for the advice re my mum. I do have a baby carrier so might have to use it a bit more. Also she will have to learn to be on the chair / pram a bit more!
Hardly any self settling for me here who am I kidding? None at all . Lara needs to be rocked and cuddled to sleep before we can move her anywhere. And during the day she cries the minute she is awake asking to be picked up. At night she is more patient and can wake up and stir but not cry when she is hungry. Think it's all my fault really dh says so as I love a cuddle and give in the minute she starts crying!

Mm don't seem to be able to strike through?

strike through test
Bel I clocked the time on your posts and did an involuntary shiver!