July 2013 - Thread 6: cankles, bumps, strangely placed lumps, the glamours of pregnancy go on and on

[dinkystinky]

New thread to natter away on.

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I think you're right Esme, every one does react in different ways. With DS1, I was pretty calm to start with - but screaming when pushing as seemed to help focus the pushes. With DS2, I was pretty calm the whole way through out - and it was alot quicker than DS1's birth (4 hours after my waters broke, 3 hours after the first contraction hit, he was in my arms).

Photographer- you dont need a maternity one, a normal exercise ball works just fine and may well be cheaper. I'm 5 ft 4 and use a 75 ball so I suspect if you're tall you'd be wanting an 85 or 95 ball. Make sure you really pump it up so its very firm.

Trust - that sounds super stressful! hope you get resolution soon.

Hello ladies!

Well I am over my hormanal blip and feeling much better now - thank you for all your nice messages. Think half the problem was I get to see how the teachers operate more than a "normal" mummy as i go in and help every week, and had seen lots of V bad behavior. Head has addressed the issues i had and has assured me that despite not being logged in DD's book she has been doing guided reading and her homework is being looked at. So all good

On other topics - labour first - i dont think there is a right way or a wrong way to react we all do it in our own way. I have been v lucky so far with my labours, all relativly easy (as far as these things go) and tend to not make noise or talk, just go into myself and concentrate on the job in hand! Pain relief wise, go with the flow - make things easier for yourself by not staying on your back but at the end of the day go for what suits you. So far i have managed on Gas and Air (and nothing for my 3rd uber quick 29min labour) but if, this time, it goes on for longer/harder i wont hink twice about having whatever i need.

Jeans wise - i have some mega comfy over the bump boden ones. Normally i hate over bump but these has been really good! Also have some mamas and papas under bump, which look fab but i am constantly pulling them up. TBH cant wait for it to warm up and get into dresses/skirts more - haha wishfull thinking as we are due snow tomorrow.

24+1

Also have to add and agree with big belly, there is no right or wrong way of coping with labour. Have as much pain relief as you want and scream as much as you need to get through it!

Wow bigBelly - 29 minutes is quick!

Hey everyone, struggling to catch up due to hyper toddler but just thought I would let everyone know that the New Look under bump jeans are fab, I got a deep red pair and they are really comfy, tops are great too and their vests were only £3.49!

Also got a pair of really comfy underbump jeans shorts.

Will say though that the jeans were a size 8 and the shorts a 10... I'm normally about a 12-14 in jeans, their sizes are huge.

Also, the TKMAXX's around here are all selling lovely slings, they are selling babasling lites for £26 and similar slings for £16!

Wow, just seen BigBelly's post. 29 minutes is super quick. I have only been induced and took ages to get to 5cm, DS was born less than an hour later though and MW's refused to believe I needed to push and thought I would have been nearer another 12 hours. That was on my back with a (failed) epidural, hoping it will be as quick this time when I should be able to move and float about a lovely hot pool in my bedroom.

Is anyone watching the show on tonight about homebirths? Looks very OBEM only at home! Excited!

I watched bits of OBEM last night, interrupted a few times with DS3 falling out of bed and DH coming in and telling me I shouldn't watch it while pg. Felt so sorry for the lady who had to do most of it on her own because her OH was looking after their DD. My labours have been quite quick (4.5 hours, 1.5 hours, 2.25 hours) due to my hypermobility. I was very serene with DS1 (at home in the pool), shouted a lot with DS2 and somewhere in between with DS3. I think it was the gas and air that made me shout, as I only used it near the end with DS3 and I was quite serene before then. DS2 was back to back so I used it like a life support system, only pausing to throw up and beg for pethidine! Hoping to try hypnobirthing this time. TBH I'm dreading the stay on the postnatal ward more than the labour. I've never been there before and some of the stories about them on mumsnet are quite scary.

OBEM provoked quite a discussion in our house last night, the bit showing the previous traumatic shoulder dystocia made me blub (I remember watching the whole episode when it was first on, I think I was pg with ds3 at the time and it was one of he scariest things I've ever seen)
Anyway dh got annoyed I was upset and couldn't understand why I was watching it till I explained I cry every week watching OBEM even the normal deliveries!! We then started talking about what this labour would be like and DH told me he's worried in case something happens to me. I suppose I hadn't really thought about it too much but it made me realise that labour is hard for the men too, just in a different way

I've been pretty lucky with deliveries so far, induced twice but relatively quick, and then a spontaneous labour with ds3 which was really quick- well not compared to bigbelly but certainly less than 3 hours of established labour, and not much pushing required! Fx I get another one like ds3, it was short, intense but utterly amazing and done mostly with just my tens machine as I was waiting for a bad on midwives unit and couldn't get gas and air till I got there! He was born about 15 minutes after getting to midwives unit ( was in assessment unit up till then but I don't think they quite appreciated how quickly things were progessing. I seem to go from 5cm from fully and needing to push v v quickly! Anyway else had this?

I'm a bit worried about delivering at home by mistake as we are 20 min from hospital if no traffic and at least double that at peak times.
I definitely do not want a home birth!!

Can't remember who mentioned hypnobirthing but I'd recommend the natal hypnotherapy CDs, i used this in preparation for arrival of ds3 and it definitely helped me

Bed not bad

Just popping up from my night shifts to do a viability dance - 24+0 today!

I've done 5 nights so far with one more to go, and I'm ruined. I have proper pregnancy cankles, despite my compression stockings, and my body aches everywhere. I am normally an excellent sleeper but haven't quite zoned my body in, plus always have to get up to pee at about 1400!

In other news, I HAVE GOT A TRAVEL SYSTEM! Albeit second hand from a mate, but it is in great nick and has everything we need. Who wants a brand new Bugaboo, anyway? Me, probably

Also got loads of clothes from her too so I am much better prepared, and can finally ditch the hairband as trouser extender effort! Blooming marvellous under bump jeans v comfy, and seem to stay up better than the my over bump H&M ones. Generally though, dresses are my friends - so comfy.

Labour-wise, I have seen a lot of labouring women, and whether they are the silent or screamy type, I take my hat off to all women who cope in their own way. Apologies for a sweeping generalization, but the younger women in my experience often make one hell of a racket but just get on with it (a fine example being the one who delivered in our Maternity Assessment Unit toilet the night before last having got to fully at home without realising). My fear is not being the loud screamy one per se, but being the loud screamy sweary one begging for a section at 2cm because I can't cope with early labour pains . At least I am not delivering where I work so I don't have to look the midwives in the face every day on my return!!

Sorry not to namecheck individuals - I am half asleep! Off back to bed before the final slightly tonight!

29 minutes!!

I was induced with DD and had my membranes ruptured, but no drip etc and it took around 3 hours. That felt plenty fast enough for me!

Sooooooo bored at work. We took on a underling which I have been training the last two weeks but we have no new content in so work is very dull at the moment. And I just found out that Monday I have to train my leave replacement! I have two months left.. Now there will be 3 of us with nothing to do in the office. We are in between TV seasons so no real footage to work on. I guess my last two months of work is going to crawl by. Thank goodness for the internet

dinkystinky thanks for the advice on the ball I have a 95cm incoming in the mail, curse my slow work days and online shopping habit. If anything it will be good for my back while watching tv hopping away.

one born every minute TOPIC looking forward to seeing it but the 4OD player has been broken all day. I think my biggest hope for my labour is to be drug-free or at the very least gas and air. Roll on hynobirthing classes.

SchroSawMargeryDaw and trustissues75 thanks for the heads up on the Home Delivery programme.

p.s. SlouchingPanda congrats on 24 weeks!

See I tried gas and air with DS1 and HATED it - made me feel dizzy, sick etc. but other friends loved it and rave it over. Each to their own - find what works for you through trial and error and just get through it I say.

Congrats on hitting viability Slouching - hope the night shifts are over soon.

Thinking - DH is also worried about something happening in birth which is why he vetoed the homebirth idea, which is ok by me as I want him to be comfortable and not worried too.

DS1 and DS2 are doing a 4k stomp for charity tomorrow with school - looking at the weather forecast I think it might be more of a splash...

Dinky, I also hated gas and air for the same reason and kept only taking the minimum number of puffs to get me through a contraction but really disliking it. Ironically, it was only when the anaesthetist came to put in my epidural (which scared me even more than the feeling of gas and air!) that I really breathed hard and continuously on the g&a to take me completely 'out of' the moment when the epidural was sited and I think maybe that was where I was going wrong with it - getting the negative effects without using enough of it to get the effect of distancing myself from the pain. On that basis I'm going to try again with it this time around and see how I get on. Am totally terrified of the whole prospect though, especially the thought of re-tearing my old tears from dc1. Can any of our 3+ timers reassure me on that??

Still off work here but starting (fingers crossed) to feel a bit better. Let's hope by next week I'll be totally recovered! Hope everyone else who's poorly is also on the mend?

I'm with you all on the back pain etc. finally got my maternity pillow down from the loft and have started blowning up my ball to sit on. Saw an osteopath on tues too. Not sure if she's going to help but thought it was worth a go.

I'm also finding that gentle exercise, although a bit uncomfy at the time, is making me generally more comfortable, so I'm hoping to carry on with that for a bit. On which note, I'm off out for a walk (in my newly purchased, 2 sizes larger sports bra )

22+2

First timers - look away and ignore this post.

Mightbe - I tore again with DS2 but it wasnt as bad as with DS1 (only a few stitches needed whereas for DS1 I was being sutured for a v long time). There are things you can do to reduce the risk of tearing- labouring in water can help soften (I suspect being in the water longer would have been beneficial with DS2's birth - as it was I got in and gave birth shortly thereafter) as can positioning/support on perineum in birth from MW. Put on your birth plan you're worried about it and would like assistance re positioning etc to reduce risk of tearing.

mightbe when I had ds I had a third stage tear that had to be sutured in theatre. This is my second dc so no experience yet re following births, but had a consultants appointment a few weeks ago and got A lot of info. She said that you are at biggest risk for a tear with your first birth. So if you have had one, you will be at higher risk of tearing again than another woman having her second baby who didnt tear during first labour. But you will have a lower risk of tearing again than when you went in for your first labour. Am I making any sense here? My midwife said water birth would reduce chance of tear, but consultant said nothing like that would make a difference, and the one thing that can help if necessary is an episiotomy, as the cut is in the other direction of a bad tear and hopefully gives a bit more room.

Oh and to first timers, I healed up quickly and had no lasting problems at all so doesnt have to be so scary...

Being a 3+ timer -heres my story:

Ds1 I tore quite badly has oodles of stitches (
All internal) but managed to avoid needing to go the theatre. TBH I had no idea ihad torn so badly as I didnt feel either the tear at the time or the stitches (thanks to aneasthetic jab!) Labour was 4.5 hours had gas and air, hated its side effects but hated pain more!

Dd I had some minor "grazing" that needed no attention. This was a quick birth and delivered her head whilst hubby ran to get midwife. Labour was 37 mins. Has gas and air for about 10mins and stopped it when I started pushing

Ds2 I had no tears or grazes at all and he shot out! He was my 29min labour. Didnt get pain relief other than using visualisation skills

All 3 weighed the exactlythe same (6lb14)but did have slight head circumfrence differences. I think when you tear first time, depending on where, Its more of a patch it up job as they expect you may have more babies.

I really fancy a waterbirth as they just sound so natural, fingers crossed!

Big belly - given the speed of your labours I reckon it'd be a race to fill the pool in time!

Ooh, really glad to have started the OBEM conversation. Thanks for all your comments and stories ladies. I don't mind admitting that I go through phases of being scared sh**less a little nervous about labour and it really helps to hear other people's stories and being reminded that all sorts of people can and do get through it in all sorts of ways. Knowing that others have managed to get through it without screaming the place down is a comfort, although I don't intend to feel too bad about it if I do!

22+4

ama when I was pg with ds I was TERRIFIED of the birth. But having been through it and being fortunate to have a positive experience I feel quite calm this time...

dinky - very true! Really concidering having a homebirth, and MW is keen for me to have one but there is a little bit of me that says "what if" we live a good 20 mins away from hospital, which although not far could be if things go a bit t*ts up! Had to call an ambulance when DD knocked her self out and had to wait 50 mins for it (as we are rural, there is no hub near us).

Ama - I think whatever number your on you have moments of being petrified! However things go the basics are pretty similar, eg it hurts - but by heck it is so worth it when you have your baby in your arms!

Also bare in mind that there is always someone who's had a better birth, more traumatic birth, more pain, no pain,great care, crap care, longer labour, shorter labour! amazing how competitive birthing seems to get when ultimatly however your baby enters the world, it's here and we are flipping fantastic woman to be able to grow a human inside us and cope with however it comes out!!

Totally agree bigbelly all that really matters is having your baby safe in your arms once it's all over

Re tears, like bigbelly I had stitches with ds1 (not in theatre), grazes not needing stitches with ds2 (and boy he shot out with 2 pushes!), and nothing with ds3. His delivery was a bit more controlled, I kind of breathed out his head, which as it turned out was very lucky, as his hand was up on his cheek and I think if I'd pushed I might have torn quite badly. We didn't know this in advance and I can only think it was some sort of natural instinct that stopped me pushing at that point. ??maybe the natal hynotherapy helped me 'listen' to my body at that point.

Overall I'm lucky that Ive healed quickly each time, I definitely recommend arnica taken after birth! For the first timers please don't worry too much about these details, being relaxed in labour is more important, and it's all worth it in the end. Goodness I feel a bit tearful typing that getting excited about meeting baby!

Thanks ladies, wise words and good reminder to focus on the end result of becoming a mummy!

Due date is exactly 4 months today , doesn't seem 5 minutes since I was saying it was exactly 5 months so I know it's just going to fly by!

Good lord its cold out there - I can't believe its nearly April and still Arctic!

Agree with Thinking - arnica v good for healing. Also took vit e which seemed to help.