March 2013 Mk V: Lumpy bumpy witty knitters (patiently) await the bloom!

[Chefette]

New one marchers sorry on phone and can't link! Will post title in our old thread x

Thanks Tiddly. Tbh I couldnt have joined sooner as I would have been all doom and gloom with dealing with my ex (long story short, abusive relationship, in and out of refuge over the past year, now have finally got rid of him). So i haven't really realised Im pregnant until now - in terms of having head space to think about it - which is lovely as I barely noticed the morning sickness!!

Sorry to hear about your SIL.

twinkle well done on the positive attitude! I was in a similar situation (though no refuge) about 6 years ago with my exDH. I just woke up one morning and thought 'I have to do something about this' so basically ran!! Haven't looked back since!
It's a good feeling!

Ahh but Ive had a long time to develop that positive attitude! He made my last pregnancy and first year with DD hellish, starved me when I was trying to bf, wouldnt let me pick her up when she was screaming, (some other stuff which i wont darken the thread with). I initially fled because he drew a samurai sword on DD (8mo). Stupidly went back. BUT ive known since then what hes like and have been able to use support, counselling etc to slowly build myself back up enough that I could completely cut ties. This pregnancy helped me to do that. He made it clear that I wouldnt be able to leave if pregnant as "you wouldnt cope without me". Well actually being pg always forces me to value myself more than i would usually. Im carrying a vulnerable life inside me and I need to ensure that life isnt endangered. So I got rid of him.

Ive worked through all the grieving process and the "why mes" this year and am now at a point where Im getting on with my life and my new little family. I know I can do this on my own, and I will. Its always interesting to talk about it as someone usually volunteers a similar experience. I think abuse touches more peoples lives than we realise in day to day life.

Hello hello! All good here, scan went well, have been moved forward a couple of days to 20 march. Nuchal was 1.5 so hoping for a good outcome once they do the combined test with the bloods. So relieved. Thanks all for the kind messages. Will need to catch up later but better go as need to start the marathon ring round and texting session!

hello lovely ladies!
I'm back from super hols (tell you more later) and haven't caught up with posts at all yet (still on previous thread!).
Just to say, had scan today and have very wriggly jiggly baby (I cried with happiness to see it). All appears to be well, but looks more developed than 12 weeks, so hopefully the consultant will be able to decide for me when I see him on weds. Measurements today suggest up to 15 weeks, so tis possible I go from being one of the last on the list to one of the early ones!
Will post again when I have finally caught up (may be some days...)

Hooray for your escape twinkle (and yours jojo)! That would have taken much strength, well done you! Can I ask if ex is baby's dad and if so, does he know? I would hate to think of you bring tied to him that's all. Sorry for being nosy, feel free to ignore the question completely. I left a really nasty shit of a man after a brief relationship after uni & had a termination after finding out I was pregnant. It was a dreadful time and I was young - I will live with the termination forever but am grateful that I have nothing to do with the shitty man.

Golly, talk about offloading. I think I am feeling a bit morose with having heard the bad news earlier - thanks for kind words guys :)

tramp I am loving your husband-training plan for mrsR, v clever! Soubds like advice from my book on toddler taming :o

ethel & shieldbug hoooorrraaayyyy!!!!!

Xposts twinkle, hats off to you.

tiddley x-posts I think! Yes it is and he does know. It wasn't exactly consensual sex which led to the conception so in my mind Im pretty sure that it was deliberate and linked to his comment (see above). Hes now 200+miles away living in a shared house with some young things so I reckon his interest will be limited. (thank god!)

x-x-posts

Am marking my place cos bookmark still not working.

Yey for scans and welcome twinkle

Ethel yay! This is great news Hope you got my PMs...

Oooh yay for Shield too! A bumper crop of great scans!

Oh what sad, sad news tiddley. Hard to imagine how difficult it must be to cope with repeated IVF attempts, as many people have to, but heartbreaking too to watch a much loved couple go through it. Really hope their time will come.

Twinkle so sorry it's been so awful but really, I'm impressed with your strength. It doesn't sound like a healthy environment for you or for bringing up children in. Keep on building those support strategies. You deserve better

Tramp good practical steps, some of which I employed with my DH! For example, to get a major garden project done I invited some of his mates from up north to join in on a working weekend rewarded with a lot of beer, curry and cooked breakfasts! Knowing we couldn't ourselves manage freshening up all the woodwork, I got some decorators over for quotes and presented those to DH rather than go on about it yet again (but by this point we had agreed to get the place smarter). And rather than moan at the end of a Sunday about how nothing housey got done (whilst I've been anchored to my desk writing book) I ask him Friday night if he could just do three small things before Sunday eve. And three small things each weekend do add up in the long run. Be a lot better when I can actually contribute myself though as things just tend to move faster then! Are you handy with a claw hammer? Can't be that difficult to get rid of offending French doors yourself

tiddley I'm so sorry to hear about your SIL :(

Ethel and shield Good news on your scans!

MrsR can you start the diy yourself instead of trying to train your dh? Seems a bit silly to be at a standoff about it! Also, this thing with Mrs Perfect is not healthy! She winds you up, so ignore her.

Bought myself a steam mop - it's BRILLIANT. So easy to clean the floors now! :)

possom are they suitable for solid wood floors? I've heard lots of good things about them, are they 'spensive?!

Hi there

I have finally caught up! One weekend away from here = a lot of posts!

Tramp Congrats on your scan - fantastic news

Turkish well done on some good maternity shopping. Which Topshop jeans did you get? I did NCT classes with DS1 and am still good friends with most of the other mums 6 years later. I think they are more for meeting people due around the same time as you. I personally found the stuff we were told to be a little wishy washy and they were very anti drugs etc.. This can all make you feel a little crap if you have any. I found the hospital antenatal class gave me a much more rounded view on birth and the options available.

TIddley My DS was 6 at the weekend. Is that the same age as yours? It was absolutely boiling the year he was born. I think that was the reason I went on to have 2 winter babies! I hope your DS had a good birthday. My DS had a Mario cake. For first birthdays I have made a dog, a penguin and then poor ds3 had cupcakes! For the last 2 cakes I have made I have bought a pattern from here Bake My Cakes which have been brilliant and very straightforward.

Ethel & Shield Congrats on good scans .

MrsR That sounds like the food I did for my ds at his party on Saturday! I've given up trying to make more adventurous party food because all the Children ever seem to want to eat is jam sandwiches and hula hoops anyway!!

Tiddley that is such sad news about your SIL

Backwards I think I need a steam mop. My kitchen floor is always disgusting after Children's meal times! Where did you get it from?

Well we had a lovely, busy weekend. DS1 was 6 on Saturday and so we had a party and then family over in the afternoon. It was such a beautiful day which was good because the party was outside! Yesterday, we had more family over and went out for lunch and then made cakes for ds to take to school today.

DS2 started at a new nursery this morning and had a fab time. He didn't want to come home so fingers crossed he is as excited to go tomorrow!

Does anyone else find that they are eating really strange combinations of food? I just ate 2 soft boiled eggs, an avocado and some endamame beans. It was all just what I felt like and delicious but even I could see it was an odd mix of food! I am eating an avocado a day, can't get enough!

I hope everyone else is well.

Empathy, Tramp, hope you feel better soon. Welcome twinkle and tiddley, so sad for your SIL's bad news.

Jojo I don't see why not - it doesn't shoot out loads of steam, just enough to keep the head of the mop wet and I assume sanitised because of the temp. pink I got a cheap one from Asda - was £25 but doesn't come with any attachments. Seems to do the job though :)

Shield & Ethel - so pleased to hear the good scan news. You must be feeling relieved. I think you need cake to celebrate :)

Ladies out of abusive relationships, well done. It takes time to stop listening to those negative voices in your head. And it's tough to find your positive outlook again. You're doing brilliantly by the sounds of things.

sheild and ethel .. Lovely news on your scans. Wow we do have a good batch cooking!

tiddley .. Your poor DB and SIL. I hope they are as well as can be expected.

pink .. Yup, that is the menu I will be dishing up at DS2 4th birthday next month. I have lived and learned the hard way with party food! My masterpiece "rainbow display of fruit" was pushed aside for the little swine to get handfuls of party rings. Never again! Sandwiches, crisps, cocktail saus, cheese cubes and party rings, followed by a batman cake! He is very excited already!

Hi all, fab news on good scans, bargains and good weekends. Sorry to those with sad news / unhappy stuff going on.

Went to Gaga last night and it was immense, we had fab tickets and it was amazing. I think I felt the dust bunny move, though it is far too early, so probably just vibrations in my bowels from the noise and bass!

Had to go into London today, it was shocking! I now have a TFL bump on board badge, I am going to make it my profile pic if all goes well on wednesday!

Heartburn has started, never had this before, bit scared of gaviscon, I hate mint, weird things make me gag and I am a right pussy, so might just put up with it!

Where did you go? I last looked on Friday went of to a Christening over the weekend and I seem to have missed a huge chunk. Marking my place now....

Ted I'm Bristol based. Thought I was the only one!

PP I got the light blue skinny jeggings! I can't remember the name now- but they called them ankle grazers? I cannot recommend them enough- SO comfy!

In hospital now, seeing consultant about gastro stuff but am waiting to go in- as always there is a delay! Grrrr

Finally going to try and get my booking bloods done today- at almost 16 weeks!! FX they will be able to take them as up until now they haven't- however, I've been 'well' for a good few weeks now so am hopeful!

Is it wrong that I want bad weather so I can wear all my lovely clothes?!

so about all of you that are soo much further along than me! Like friend, because I have been put back two weeks she is snapping at my heels and I have been pregnant forever!!!!

FX blood goes well and gastro stuff is ok Turk!

Right then, have caught up...

Manda you were asking about cleaners a while back. I have one having to go to a stage that we simply couldn't do it all- both working full time plus I was spending every weekend and evening on my thesis blah blah - anyway my good pals sat me down and told me that I had to get over my 'working class northern guilt' and boy did I - I hired a cleaner to come in once a fortnight and we agreed a cleaning schedule. It changed my life and I started looking forward to time off rather than dreading starting on 'that mess'. Cost is about £10 an hour. Reliability is the issue - ours tends to come when she feels like it (She has more money than we do and knows that we trust her and finding someone else rust worthy will be a pain in the butt) Agencies charge a little more but they bear responsibility if the cleaner doesnt turn up.

sheldon booties are soooooo cute. I welled up when I saw them. Feeling inspired by your work to get my knitting needles out again.

zoey that is one helluva shoe and bag collection. te Mulberrry factory shop is not too far from my house in the SW and it's hard to drive past!

Gummi hope you feel better
Turkish I booked into NCT course but refused to pay an extra £40 to become a member - could not see the benefit
Tiddley so sorry to hear about you SIL. Its just an awful emotional rollercoaster. You'd be made of stone not to feel a bit down hearing that news.
tramp make the bugers believe it was their idea - your husband training sound like marketing to me!!! nice one.
mrsr just to echo what other's have said in my northern blunt way Mrs perfect is not worth worrying about - but it sounds like you have some things to sort out. If making your home a more relaxing place for you will make you feel betterthen do what you have to to make it so. Tramp had some brilliant ideas - and doing up a place can be done without huge expenditure. When I set up home I got lots of free stuff from freecycle, made covers for chairs, painted stuff myself - it wasn't perfect but I got better as I went along and I learned from people who could. You do need to have a happy, comfortable space to be in - with those hormones demanding that you nest tough I think Mrs perfect is the brunt of your frustrations but not really the cause particularly when you said Mr perfect was nicer than MrR. God I sound like a right lofty cow. Hopefully you know what I mean...talk to Mr R - take an evening to have a bit of time together - just you and him....and if that doesn't work - wait til he goes out and get your mates round to do a 60 minute makeover of one of your rooms!! xxx

Am lost re: facebook - are we doing it? do I need to PM someone to get on there?

Dame, 'working class northern guilt' is kind of my problem, haha! I think two hours (floors, bathroom, mainly) would do it ? which makes me feel bad that we find it so difficult. Thanks for the advice on finding someone good (if not quite as regular as you'd like!) Yep, the FB scan-fest is go! About 10-12 peeps on there now, methinks? Will PM you 'structions.

Sundae did you send off for your 'bump' badge? I emailed an address I found online ? but nothing, and that was about 6 weeks ago! Do you know if they hand them out at the kiosks?

I am on strike. Neither of my printers are working. I even had a little cry. Feel hormonal and pathetic, but am putting the radio on and sticking two fingers up at my book deadline and my work's inability over the past 15 months to provide me with a functioning printer despite many polite requests and the fact that our project brought in around 200K profit for them, out of which - you'd think - they could afford either to fix my printer or just buy me another one. Rant over.