Rats Successfully Smacked, the 'No Brookers' uneventful pregnancy and pain free birth thread :)

[MeconiumHappens]

Hello :)

And another girl lost both at 21 weeks... it's so sad, I find myself crying for strangers I've never met and never will...

We all know nothing's certain until they're in your arms and healthy but this time I am off the scale worried, and I know that will do no good at all, sigh...

Anyway, I'll go and mope elsewhere til I feel more positive and take myself and my maybe-not-so-enormous-hope-it's-growing bump off to watch tv instead.

I'm tired, home from work, DD to bed, had tea and shower, put casserole in slow cooker for DD, did a load of laundry, still haven't made a sandwich for work tomorrow but I've hit the wall. Game over, energy gone!!!!

I am much more worried this time too even with only 1 to think of. My friend who just had her 2nd (5 weeks early!) was telling me that she worried much more this time too. Mybe just amplified with the twin pg?

I got to hold her titchy wee newborn DD though :)

oh how lovely!!! a titchy wee newborn to cuddle and give back for night-time

Yes, I think once you've spoken to loads of other mums, which lots of people haven't done before their first, you can be sheltered from the hideousness of late miscarriages, late death in utero and stillbirth stories. I had more fears from my job about prematurity and disability through this and syndromes etc (seem common as muck when thats all you see all day!) but after about 20 weeks I really relaxed with DD, and didn't get so worried and morbid there's no hope for me, it's ridiculous I will only relax once they're both out and doing ok!!!!!!!

I had a mei tai sling that was really great. I had a ring sling for when DD was tiny, which is better as they need to be laid flat, but stopped using as hurt my shoulder.

Dream it is very understandable especially when you have two babies at once to love and worry about.
I have been having nightmares about losing this baby. I think having two losses in a row, I think wow I have got this far but what if it is just so that I can have a late loss... :(
I always get more worried coming up to a scan and it really hasn't helped having nearly two extra weeks to stew.

What are the stats on who is having what flavour baby now, I am pretty sure I fell off just before people were having 20 week scans?

I think I want to find out, so if you want to place votes on what you think I am having please do If it helps the only name I really love is a boys one atm.

Oh Dream, how awful! So sad. There is a section of Sands specifically for people who have lost one twin, because sadly most people's reaction seems to be 'oh well, you still have one left'. And organising the funeral with one newborn when you should have two... I have always wanted twins but I don't know what I would do if I lost one or both of them. I don't think you're silly at all to worry - I would be petrified (even though nothing is going to happen to you and everything is going to be fine!).

Oooh, Purple, I vote for...mmm...a boy! I shall go update the stats thread with my pink bean, good thinking.

purple I vote girl!

too, I know, even my DH said after I had the really bad pains 'I'll get the doppler from work at least I can find one heartbeat' and even he didn't qite get that losing one is still a total tragedy... I can imagine that being the reaction, or the part used to 'comfort' someone who wants to grieve for their child... fingers crossed, everything crossed it doesn't happen to me

Too a girl! Pomme is having a girl also? Maybe we will all have girls!

Statistically in my family a girl is most likely... I secretly want it to be a boy, just as I don't think more babies are on the card. But I will be so thrilled with another girl.

Dream I do think it stems from the comforting angle, it just perhaps feel that they are not recognising your pain. After my 10 week MC people would say 'Oh, you can have another one.' I would be thinking, but I want that one back! Just misguided, and people do feel awkward about what to say.

Anyway, we are not brooking on this thread!!!

Dream those stories are just so sad. As Purple says I think sometimes people say 'silly' things, or things they've not thought through properly in an attempt to be 'sympathetic' or to lessen the pain, but realistically there is nothing that anyone could say that would lessen the pain of losing any child.

It's not quite the same, but I can't watch anything where a child is hurt etc without crying since having ds as I just can't deal with the thought of anything happening to him.

And Too, it's so sad that you (and all the others in your position) know all this from your own experience. I desperately hope that in March you'll be holding this gorgeous bean in your arms watching her scream her lungs out! And your dd is watching over you I'm sure to make sure this happens. This bean will always have her gorgeous big sister watching over her.

Sorry, I'm sure I intended this to be an upbeat post. And I'm hoping that I've not fallen into my own trap and said stupid insensitive things

We are all Brooking. No. Argument. And we will be doing so all the way through. We will all get there and this time next year we'll be comparing pooey nappy stories, and sling success stories

That's so sad Dream. It's understandable to be worried and not selfish at all, I would be the same. But this is the Brooking thread and these are the Brooking babies, so they'll all be fine! Like Biscuits says, next step for us is the pooey nappy stories

Also my vote goes for a boy Purple, just because. Is your scan today?

Dream thanks for the sling advice. I'm 5'7 and currently between 8-10, so fairly slim, no idea how I'll end up though! The main times I'll be taking the little kipper out is when I'll be taking the dog out for a walk I imagine (I'm not a shopper generally) . The dog is well behaved but can be quite boisterous. He also has a fascination with bubbles and are the best means of keeping him closeby and well behaved when on walks, so I'll probably be using them a lot more when also out with a lo to look after, which would mean stopping and sitting a lot during walks to blow bubbles for the dog. Which I guess would mean it'd be nice to have something to put the lo in during this time, although maybe I won't want to disturb him/her and would keep lo in the sling?

Biscuits there are a lot of videos of people with those magic slings on youtube, I think they're just wraparound slings but not too sure?

Hmm, hard to know. My Lo slept in the sling and woke if i stopped moving she wouldn't have wanted to move. Depends on the baby though I guess, that's the hard part. My dog walker friends who both have collies which take a lot of walking use Ergo and Boba as can climb stiles etc and both their children, similar age to my dd, are still good and sit in them as they do it every day. For me, I stopped walking so much when she started sleeping in her cot, but she sat on a walk with friends by the river at the weekend ok. Now she wants to get out and walk herself in the wrong direction though...

P.s pooey nappies and slings. I WILL focus on that, not linger on awful babies dying thoughts. Getting back to no brooking.

Not insensitive at all, Biscuits, very sweet and moving!

Right, shall start Brooking again! Everything will be absolutely fine and nothing will go wrong for any of us, and that's final!

I shall also have to master the baby/sling/pram/dog conundrum at some point. We have a whippet cross and at the moment we have a dogwalker who comes at lunchtime and takes him for a nice long walk, but we shan't be able to afford that on maternity pay. I want to keep her on for the first couple of months while I am still on full pay, though, because life will be so much easier that way. Most of the places I would walk the dog involve steep hills and rough tracks, which will not be fun with a pram. Maybe I can lash the dog to the front of the pram and he can help pull...I really want to use the pram, even if the sling might actually be easier in all some ways.

Hello! Scan is today at 10.30, DH has the day off and DD is with the childminder so may not update til this evening.

My friend managed with pram and dog, if she is being intrpid she had a front carrier and now has a framed ruck sack type.

The long length of material is a wrap sling, I believe! Very popular with my mum friends and I think I will borrow one from my baby group to try out.Maybe some of your local groups have this sling hire service? I am expecting my back to be buggared for awhile after birth since I have been signed off for nearly 7 weeks with it already.

Starting to feel excited amongst the nerves, focussing on excited as I hardly remember my 12 week scan as was so worried and could hardly breathe until they said it was ok... I.e at the end of the scan!
Another vote for boy and considering it has been girls so far, maybe I will have the blue bump?

Good brooking, Dream :)

Purple I'm excited for your scan today. I'm going to say......boy.

Ok I've got round to thinking about changing bags. I do like a nice designer one. With DS I bought a Storksak, Emily style. It's been used for almost 3 years and is now very distressed looking so I think it's only right that I get a new one for the new baby. (Since I won't be getting much else new).

I'm going to wait until after my 20 week scan (4 weeks tomorrow) and then order one so that DH can buy it for my Christmas present.

The yummy mummy style ones with cakes and birds and shoes and other random pictures on aren't my style. I like ones that look like giant handbags, small holdalls etc. I don't mind a bit of a pattern but also like plain (but coloured rather than black). Up to £100 max. Any ideas?

So sad to hear stories like that dream :( I am beginning to think I might be carrying two, I am showing already and didn't with my others till later! I am counting the days until my scan to find out.
I had a good meeting with my BA at work today. She was suggesting ways to make my pregnancy and ML as stress free as possible and telling me which weeks to do abit of overtime to boost my MP.

Another brief hello from me. I keep reading but don't have the time or energy to write much! And I can hear DS waking up so can't write much at the moment anyway. Just wanted to say hello and that I am still Brooking No Argument for us all.

Scarlet I have a love affair with Ju Ju Be bags, gadgety and really functional, esp as you can wash them in the machine! There are plenty of patterned ones but also some plain/leather. I am eyeing up a be prepared but they are ££s and possibly too big.

Scan was fantastic, baby looks great, healthy, really fat tummy as measuring 23 weeks! I am so relieved. Phew.

And I got what I wanted, DH was stunned I have never seen him look so shocked!
A baby boy :o :o :o
Saw his willy and balls!! :o :o :o

Yay! A boy brooking bean!! Congrats Purplebuns!!

I have a pacapod bag I like but I also have a lovely black Armani Jeans bag my mum bought me as a birthday present which now dd is older is big enough to use for both our stuff.

purple boys rock! (As I'm sure girls do) ds is the best ever - he's currently in his pushchair holding onto a half gnawed potato (cooked) and dozing off

Yay for a healthy baby boy Purple

Boys are fab! (I'd say girls were if I had one of course, as I'm sure they are too) My DS is currently dancing round the room with his teddy in circles to "I like to move it move it" which is on Madagascar, his favourite dvd.

Thanks for the bag link, going to have a look through now.

Also going to check out the pacapods pomme, thanks.

Girls are fabulous truly, but I wanted a boy more because I didn't think I would, since boys are very sparse in my family! I do have brothers but they are ID twins and are from my dads previous marriage, so a bit of a fluke!
Not sure I can do the TTC rollercoaster and my body isn't holding up very well this time in PG so not sure I will be having anymore.

I am grinning like a cheshire cat honestly, I am surprise by how pleased I am.
Although, have already had one comment about the 'perfect' family since I will have one of each.

purple I have a ju-ju-be messenger bag its lovely but its quite heavy even without anything in it!
A boy, how lovely and exciting. Little boys rock (my ds is 4). He has spent most of yesterday evening recording himself shouting 'boobies boobies' and laughing hysterically into his new leappad explorer. And he LOVES cuddles.
*disclaimer - I'm sure little girls rock too but I don't have one so I don't know!

biscuits just get about 5 metres of fabric and watch some youtube vids and you will be slinging with the best of 'em.

purple check out happybags for changing bags, they have an excellent range.

Also for second timers - I'll be 6 weeks tomorrow and already my trousers are getting tight. They are really uncomfortable by the end of the day and I have to change after I've been to work. Surely this can't be happening yet?

Purple that's so annoying isn't it. I hate it when people say that. I was asked yesterday by someone I barely know if I was hoping for a girl this time.
I looked at her like this and said "Er no. I think 2 boys would be lovely actually, but if it's a girl I'll be equally delighted. I honestly have no preference". WTF else was I supposed to say to that?