December 2010: no, it's not an autumn pumpkin up my jumper ...

[Miffster]

...and we're gliding towards the third trimester, draped in suitably flowing attire.

just dropping in quickly to say it's my wedding anniversary today

Happy anniversary mp!

I'm guessing we're all starting to feel the joys of the third trimester now - suddenly feeling very pregnant (when compared to, say, a month ago) - back pain, etc.

TMI alert- terrible constipation had me in tears on Sunday night, mostly I think because I couldn't summon up the effort required just to get the ehem, (oh, well, I did warn you) the poo out which made me feel like a total failure and completely unequipped to be able to get a baby out in two to three months' time.

Keep having total breakdowns at the thought of a) giving birth and b)actually caring for an infant. Poor DH is starting to get quite worried.

PJen my DH reckons its actually illegal to splash a pedestrian - and if you do, you're supposed to stop. Not that that helps. You did very well not to turn round and push the horrid teenagers into the path of the oncoming bus.

Interesting what you say about ECV C&G - will look into that as I'm sure LO is breech (and B2B) at the moment and has been for a while. MW appt on Thursday (along with Anti-D jab) so will ask her then.

Sorry to change the subject totally, but what does everyone think of the cut in child benefit? I get too wound up by the posters on the main forums - it affects us very directly but I'd much rather sacrifice a few things now and get rid of the debt. It has really annoyed me this morning to hear that the Daily Mail is saying "mumsnetters are up in arms" when, from what I can see, the opinion is quite evenly divided!

MP Happy anniversary

PJen I wanterd to cry when I read your post, how awful. I am sending you a big hug. It happened to me once when I was at college and it was hideous, I can't imagine it happening now. I would of had a melt down in the street. You need a big treat like a nice massage. Hope you are feeling better now and you managed to get all your new buys clean x

WWSB Prune juice really helps, but buy the supersweet California one, the organic one didn't work half as well.

In regards to the child benefit cuts, at least it won't come in until 2013. I understand the need for cuts but do feel it is wrong to target a univeral benefit for mothers and children, for some women it is the only income they get, and just because someone has a wealthy partner, that doesn't always equate to an equal relationship where money is shared. Sad but true.

I am really feeling the last trimester and am feeling like a bit of a misery guts, I am so tired, but thankfully only 6 more working days left. I can't sleep, I feel enormous and am so uncomfortable. 1 twin is breech and has her head right under my ribs, the other has her feet pretty much on my stomach and I am still sick after 70% of the meals I eat

C&G Hope your cold goes soon, I am also very bunged up but it's vastly preferable to the ear and throat infection I had last week, so I'm looking on the bright side

Has everyone started thinking about names?

Morning all, feeling quite a lot better today so I've been cleaning and hoovering while I have the energy. Waiting for Tesco to arrive too. The aches and pains have gone at least, yay!

maxpower happy anniversary!

Whatwillsanta I'm with you on the giving birth and I've done it three times already! I'm so scared! I'm worrying about everything going wrong as I've been lucky so far and had no tears, stitches etc. I think baby is still breech today, not sure though. It's worth having a look online, easier to get both sides of the story on ECV that way and you can read from women that have had it done. Each to their own of course and I know some would rather try that first but it's not for me.

Lavita I agree with you re child benefit. I've been reading a lot of the threads yesterday and that side of the arguement makes a lot of sense. I also think that while there is a need to cut back, they're doing it all the wrong places, imo. Names, we're still liking Niamh a lot, it's really growing on me; the only problem for me is what it would/could be shortened to.

thanks all

WWSB constipation is horrible (I was going to say crap but that would have been a really bad pun ) - try the prune juice, alpen, drink plenty of water.

Lavita sorry you're struggling. My SIL had twins last year and I remember how huge and uncomfortable she was towards the end. the 16th Nov will be here before you know it!

C&G glad to hear you're beginning to feel better. Loving the name Niamh by the way.

We've got a girls name we're pretty much decided on but I'm struggling for a boy's name - current possibilities are Benjamin, Joseph or Matthew - any thoughts?

re CB - It's not pleasant but I think it's right to cut it for higher earners - in some ways it spreads the pain of the cuts a bit more as so far, it does feel those on lower incomes or reliant on benefits will be hardest hit. However, I think most people expect them to be a bit tougher on those members of society who are more well off as well.

Hi Everyone,

Just tracked down this thread...

I am due 20th December - fingers crossed it doesn't pop out on Christmas Day? Anyone got a similar due date???

I might just have to kill DH. He's given me a horrible cold, he got to lay in bed or on the sofa all weekend taking vicks sinex, I get to get up at 6am with DC's, look after them all day and do housework and not able to take anything. He told me to leave the housework and rest but rest is impossible with two toddlers running around and the tiniest bit of dust drives me insane at the moment.

Happy anniversary maxpower

We're stuck on a middle name. At the moment we're thinking of Kira as a first name but we're struggling to find a middle name that goes with it that isn't already used by us or SIL. If I was having a boy we'd be fine as we'd found a first and middle name that we both liked.

Having a really tough day. Mega post, sorry.

Test results came back clear, but I booked to see a GP (not mine, he's on holiday) to discuss the results and what to do next and it turns out that the bile acid test wasn't done. My GP either didn't know to order them or forgot and I hadn't checked the form closely enough. LFT alone is not at all conclusive.

So I kinda feel that I'm no further forwards and still bloody itching! And it makes me stressed that I'm pregnant and so tired and still having to prompt the doctors to get decent medical care. If I hadn't specifically asked today, the GP I saw wouldn't even have looked to see if the bile test was done! I'm used to having to be an expert patient and lead my healthcare but it gets so tiring and frustrating. For once, I'd like to think that I'm being looked after properly.

So I'm back off to the hospital this afternoon to get the tests redone with all the right tests! And that's instead of having a nap too, which I could do with after being up half the night itching.

I've decided that if this lot come back negative, I'm parking myself at the GPs every week to demand the tests get redone. I'm terrified that it could be OC (itching can start before test results are positive) and it might be missed.

Plus, until I get a diagnosis, I have nothing to help the itching, just Piriton to help me sleep. And I don't want to be taking that all the time when I don't know what it causing the symptoms. It's really starting to get to me. I'm not sure I can cope with another 10-12 weeks of this!

PJen - I'm not surprised you cried! That sounds awful.

KittyBump - we're doing the nursery yellow too. Now it's finally cleared out, there's just a few bits of prep to do before it finally gets painted. I can't wait - really want to nest now and start getting the room properly sorted.

WWSB - don't stress about constipation, it only makes it worse (ironic, huh?). And if you strain, you'll get piles so it will then be agonising.

If you're getting really stressed about labour, hypnotherapy might help. A friend gave me copies of the Hypnobirthing scripts and it definitely isn't for me (way too American and airy-fairy!) but I'm thinking of getting the (british) Natal Hypnotherapy CDs. Though atm I don't know whether to get the home birth, hospital birth or C-section ones!

I think cutting child benefit for higher earners makes sense, although that's obviously tough on middle-income earners who are over the threshold but not very well off. I never understood why everyone got it though. It does need to be capped IMO so that we move away from the whole idea that if you're completely broke, you can get more money and a bigger house by popping out more kids you won't look after properly. Maybe cap it at 3 kids for example. And I agree that the deficit needs to be cut and that means not everything can be paid for!

I actually agree with many of things the Government is doing, e.g. IDS's ideas on getting rid of a system where you're better off on benefits and would have to reduce your income to go back on work - that has always been just mad and so hard when you really do want to work (I've been in that situation having been disabled). But they need to be really careful that people who should be getting help (e.g. the disabled) aren't the ones who get hit the hardest. Some people are so ill that they really can't work or can't keep a job at least. Not everyone having their incapacity or diablity benefits removed is a cheat - many are genuinely sick.

Jeez, Pjen. People are such horrid creatures sometimes. Did you manage to salvage any of the shopping? I would be very very .

I had my 28 week midwife appointment yesterday. The first two midwives and the consultant whom I have met at C&W were all fab. But, this midwife must have gotten her qualification out of a cracker jack box (sorry, American phrase meaning it's worthless and she did nothing for it). I told her that my scar has been itching and even a bit painful sometimes. I said the pain was not unbearable, but obviously wanted to know if this was normal or a cause for concern. She very obviously clueless and suggested I ring the labour ward. How can a midwife not know what is / isn't normal caesarean complication in pregnancy???

I've decided to start a thread on MN figuring I'd get more credible medical advice. Moron!

As I say, the first 2 midwives I met were lovely. The second one seemed quite knowlegable on excercise in pregnancy which was very helpful. This seemed to shiver a cold chill into the air when I told her I already had a section booked. She clearly disapproved.

I am now wondering whether I really need to take a day off work to go to my 34 week appointment which I expect may be similarly productive.

I hope everyone is well. I have shamefully not read much.

Oh, and my travels to Aberdeen are over. Yippee!!!!! Twat of a client and I don't miss 4:00am wake up calls.

maxpower I really like Joseph, it's my dad's name, he often gets called Joe or Joey.

Scaltini welcome, I'm due on 23rd Dec so will see!

crazy it's so hard when you have little ones already and you're ill, do try and rest as much as possible and drink lots of fluids. Hope you're feelign better soon.

japhrimel that's annoying about the test not being done, I know exactly what you mean about having to make sure things get done though, same here tbh. How long will the test results take to come through now? Are there any other tests that can be done to show OC or rule it out?

I don't get how they've done the child benefit though, if two people earn say £40k each a year but one family has one earner on £44k then even though the first are earning a lot more they would still be able to claim CB but the second family wouldn't! How does that make sense?? I'm not sure capping at a limit of children would be beneficial though, it isn't the child's fault and they've been banging on about cutting child poverty so that would only increase it. It's a vast minority of people that would be having more children just for more money or a bigger house imo. Maybe they should concentrate on all those massive bonus schemes for banks, tax avoidance, means testing winter fuel allowances (which I think they should definitley do) etc etc. At the moment they're just hitting families and women. Low to middle income families and single parent families are really hit hard by all these cuts. I don't think the Tories will ever get voted back in again next time either as I don't believe this was the right thing to do and neither do a lot of people.

We're in that situation with disability too, dh is disabled and simply cannot work at the moment even though he wants to and has a degree that he now can't use due to his disablities. It's really awful for him but he's hoping to retrain as a teacher next year, if he's well enough. He hates not being able to work but there is nothing he can do about it. He has so many things wrong with him all stemming from his Lupus, he nearly died from a blood clot on his lung a couple of years ago and has had a few in his leg too leaving the inside scarred and making movement painful and sometimes impossible. Thing is, he's supposed to keep active as his blood has a tendancy to clot (he's on injections for it) but he needs to rest it because of the scarring and something else he has! It's really impossible. So not everyone is just "putting it on" or trying to get away with doing as little as possible. Sorry for the long post, got quite carried away there!

strix cross posts then. I agree she should have known what was normal or not. Sounds a bit worrying that it's painful now, hope you're ok.

It's not really painful, but now and then I get a twinge where I think "ouch. What was that?" I'm sure it's nothing serious just now. But, I was expecting some information on what signs to look for if it gets worse. Or maybe a few twinges and itchy scar are perfectly normal and there's a long way to go before I need to call someone?

Oh well... I guess I'll rely on MN, which is usually a more credible source of useful information anyway.

Congratulations maxpower

WhatWillSantaBring I totally sympathise with teh constipation thing. Have you tried mixing prune juice with warm/hot water and downing it in one? I sometimes worry tbat I am pushing so hard I will push the baby out ahead of time!

I am quite pissed off about the unfairness of thewhole child benefit thing and have been having a bit of a rant about it on the other parts of mumsnet

I think it's really unfair that a family on one oncome of £44k won't get it but a family on a joint income of £80k will. Am also not happy with te idea of married people getting a tax break, despite being married myself.

*C&G I agree with just about everything you've said RE the tories and the cuts.

Lavitabellissima I am so jealous that you are leaving work in 6 days! I have spent the day clearing out all my drawers and getting togetehr some kind of training plan for the new person.

I am having sleep issues too, but so far my bump is fairly comfortable.

We haven't really done uch in the way of names as DH and I seem to have such different taste. Though if it's a boy then I think we know what we will call it - Joseph. A girl will be harder because I have my mind set on one name which DH really islikes.

Welcome scaltini

japhrimel what a massive pain in the bum. I hope they sort this out for you!

and strix sorry to hear your midwife was such a numpty!

I agree with c&g also re the tax cuts, Im 22 and will be a single mother, had to move back in with my mam to have the baby as I wanted to keep working (after maternity leave) and when I looked into entitlements etc both during and after maternity leave, I would have been able to offer no quality of life for my child. I was even told by several 'professionals' that I would be better off quitting my job and living off benefits which I thought was a bit

Hope things get sorted soon japh it sounds awful!

not tax cuts sorry...just cuts!

Hi all
Sorry to jump in but really interested in what Strix may find about the scar thing. Had DC1 10 years ago and until recently my cs scar was just a shiny skin coloured line, now it is red and sore on the right side. Was ok when I saw the MW but was planning on asking her when I go again in a few weeks.
Congrats to all btw, not long now xxx

Reagrading tax (cuts) it seems everything in this country is worked out for the individual irrespective of other household income. I find that a bit a odd. In the US you can file jointly and so you combine the incomes and then are taxed as a household. Then, you mark a number of dependants which gives you a bit of a tax break so a couple with one child is taxed more than the couple who have six to support. It seems much more sensible to me. But, then being American myself, I guess I may be buased.

Evening all. Congratulations to maxpower and welcome to scaltini

Japh sorry you didn't get the right test results, that's really annoying. I hope they can get you the right results soon.

WWSB I'm getting to same situation as started on iron again :( I did try prunes earlier in the pregnancy but was having to force them down and they were making me gag. I've bought some bran flakes and trying to remember to drink lots.

strix at that midwife. It's not her place to judge. Grrr. Hope you get some decent advice about your scar.

As regards to names I love Naimh C&G and Joseph is on our list too!! In fact, it is the only boy's name we've agreed on so far although I quite like Joshua as well. For a girl we currently like Lydia, Josephine or Marianne. No middle name for girl yet, have a family name for a boy.

I've been back at work yesterday and today but came home early both days to rest for a bit and had quick snooze today then logged on from home. DD threw a massive tantrum on way home from nursery in local shop. I had to pick her up to haul her out of there and pulled something in my pelvis on my good side so not too pleased. Other than that, feel I am coping ok with work.

thanks ladies

Japh - that is such a massive mistake to not test for your bile levels when thats what the test was done for??! madness! Hope you get some speedy results and hope you get some respite from the itching - must be awful...

Strix - Strange a midwife can't answer a question on a C sectio scar . Surely thats part of their job and knowledge?

Like the name choices coming up - DH and I like Jasper but I'm not sure if its a bit too odd.... My other boys names are not common but not unusual either. What do you guys think?

Wow - finishing up soon Lavita! brilliant! I bet you can't wait - not long now .

I have to say in principle I totally agree with cutting child benefit for over £44k earners. The injustice regarding high dual incomes needs to be sorted out (and hopefully they will see sense on this - am sure more detail will come out), but this category dont need the benefit - and I'm in this category. We are not massively well off and are just over the banding but I totally agree with it going. Yes I like the money (even more so with this being DC3) but can I live without it? - Yes. Do I think there are people who need the money more than me - Hell yes... The cuts have to come from somewhere and this is as good as any... What will annoy me is if I'm being hit and others who are making a decent income from the state without a genuine reason for not working wont be touched. C&G - Obviously you guys are not in this category! Lupus is a horrible illness and your poor DP must feel quite down about not working when he wants to - How is the CB cut affecting you guys though? Laurie, not sure how the cuts are affecting you either - presume you are refering to other cuts apart from CB as I'm guessing you're not going back to a £45k+ job a year (you may be though - just didnt' get that impression?). Not being funny at all about my questions but perhaps I'm a bit ignorant about how the proposed cuts may be affecting others - Its so easy to just focus on how you (as in me!) are personally affected without seeing other people's stories.

I like Jasper :)

DH and I are just over the threshold too (combined wage)so would lose CB if it was on a combined wage which wouldn't worry me too much to be honest. Though I do wish they would do something about the cost of childcare and I read that Childcare Vouchers may be changed in some way in the future which would worry me :(

I like the name Jasper.

Bloods taken today - results Friday.

oooooh names Im having a girl and I like Indie and Willow...Not the 'normal' names I know but my friends all says its very me!

Just read your post properly chooster the cuts as such aren't really affecting me as yet, but Im sure they will start to focus on lower earners soon, however due to the uncertainty etc and the fact that the benefits system seems to work on the fact that the goverment sees around £90 a week an acceptable income to be able to pay for all bills, food, clothes etc (everything apart from housing) if I wanted to continue working (Im currently working 27 hours at minimum wage) I wouldnt be able to give my child any quality of life and wouldnt like to risk signing a tenancy agreement to find I couldnt keep up with payments so until it settles down Im back with my mam, wouldnt like to agree to pay a monthly rent and then have money cut...I was more shocked that I was told to quit my job and go onto benefits...if people are being told this by people that are supposed to be 'professionals' when I sought help when I realised I was going to be a single parent then theres no wonder there are people out there with poor work ethics and just living off the government!

Sorry just read my post back and I was rambling (tired!)...Just feel like I need to make it clear that I've chosen to move back in with my mam rather than quit my job whilst I finish Uni, I have been very lucky to have that option (big house with my own bedroom bathroom and sitting room) and without that Im pretty sure the way the benefits system is currently working I would be unemployed, pregnant and living in council accomodation and benefits as that does seem the only viable option from the research and information I have received!

My mam is having her CB cut for my brother as she is a higher earner but she does agree that the cuts should come from somewhere!

Anyway...sleep is calling, I might start making sense soon!