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Good news and bad

231 replies

bubble99 · 22/02/2005 11:58

I am actually Bubble's husband but I'm posting this on her behalf as I know some of you have becomes friends with her during this pregnancy.

She went into hospital last week to have a standard induction. To cut a long and painful story short, some six hours later she was rushed into an emergency caesarian and two boys were delivered. Sadly, the second twin was still-born. We are very hurt and sad at the moment as there was nothing wrong with the health of the child. The, usually fantastic, medical staff made some bad decisions and it has cost our son's life.

The surviving twin has now come out of intensive care and is called Elijah, or Jah-Jah Binks to his brothers (8lb 1oz). The other twin is called Bo (7lb 7oz). The sizes give you some idea of why she went for induction.

She says she'll update you all when she comes out of hospital, hopefully by the end of the week.

One last thing: My views of medics have inevitably been altered by this experience. Alhtough we are blessed with some of the highest trained and conscientious medical staff you could hope to find, I would ask any of you to question them endlessly in the event of a complication during the pregnancy or birth. Find out EXACTLY what the problem is, what the possible courses of action or inaction are and why they have come to the decision they have made. They are the specialists but I feel now more than ever that as an intelligent lay person you should be at least able to know ALL the criteria they are basing their decisions on. We were given no warning, told that everything was just fine even though we now know that our babies should have been removed within the hour, not after six. Had the medical staff been more open about their thinking and decision-making process we could have two babies today instead of one. Put simply, annoy them senseless with questions and make sure their personal feelings are not affecting clinical decisions.

P.S. Thanks for all being such good friends to my wife (It keeps her of my back during the evening )

OP posts:
whimsy · 22/02/2005 16:53

Congratulations to you on the birth of Elijah and sending you my deepest sympathies on the sad loss of baby Bo

Miaou · 22/02/2005 16:57

Congratulations on the birth of your twins, bubble and mr bubble. So sorry that Bo is no longer with you. I wish you all the very best for the future.

morningpaper · 22/02/2005 16:58


nnosam · 22/02/2005 17:00

may little Bo sleep soundly forever, my deepest sympathies to you all.

welcome to the big world little Elijah.

biglips · 22/02/2005 17:12

congrats xx and sorry to hear the bad news xxxxx

scaredofwhatshappening · 22/02/2005 17:15

A tiny life taken well before its time,
The tears and anguish in the parents eyes,
So unfair and unjust, the happiness halved,
Still the memory of Bo on your heart is carved,
May he still go on living through his precious brother,
And the love that Elijah brings help you to help each other,
Little Bo, tiny angel, sleep sound and tight,
all through the days and your everlasting night.
Though your family never got the chance to get to know you,
They will always remember, love and adore you.
Gooodnight darling Bo x x x

So sorry for your loss. I hope that your precious son Elijah brings you love and joy through the dark times of your loss.

welcome to the world baby Elijah. You are more precious than you will ever know. x x

biglips · 22/02/2005 17:16

scared - that is a gorgeous poem - really touched my heart

dinosaur · 22/02/2005 17:18

Congratulations and deepest sympathy too. Thinking of you all.

dejags · 22/02/2005 17:19

Dear Mr & Mrs Bubble

congratulations on the birth of your beautiful son in the most tragic of circumstances. I know neither you or your family but you will be in my thoughts as you grieve Bo (beautiful name btw).


oxocube · 22/02/2005 17:26

I'm so very sorry for you all. Much love and a special kiss to your new son, oxo xxxx

katierocket · 22/02/2005 17:28

what an awful, tragic experience. So sorry for your loss. Welcome Elijah.

tamum · 22/02/2005 17:28

Congratulations on the arrival of Elijah. I am just so sorry to hear what happened to poor little Bo.

ScummyMummy · 22/02/2005 17:35

Congratulations on the birth of your boys. I'm so, so sorry that Bo died. I hope that you all get the support you need to celebrate Elijah at the same time as adjusting to the death of Bo and grieving for him. I cannot even imagine how difficult that process is going to be. Thinking of you. xxxxxxxxxxxx

Uwila · 22/02/2005 17:43

I don't know you and you don't know me. I just wanted to say that this thread has deeply touched me this afternoon. What a horrible tragedy... while at the same time of course a great joy for Elijah.

May God grant you all the strength you need in days, months, and years ahead.

harrogatemum · 22/02/2005 18:00

to bubble and family- I am very sorry to hear about your loss - thinking of you at this sad time. Congratulations on the birth of ELijah. Hope you are keeping your spirits up at this difficult time xxxx

Socci · 22/02/2005 18:06

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Tinker · 22/02/2005 18:11

I am so sorry to read this, can't imagine what you are feeling. Thinking of you all.

DecafArabica · 22/02/2005 18:57

Bubble and Mr Bubble, Elijah and Bo, like so many Mners, my thoughts are with you all. The love and support I received from Mumsnet members during my recent miscarriage has been incredible and I hope that these messages can in some small way comfort you too.

milward · 22/02/2005 19:07

So sorry for what has happened to Bo xxx

So happy that Elijah is ok xxx

Tessiebear · 22/02/2005 19:08

Welcome to the world baby Elijah, Rest in peace little Bo. So sorry to hear your news Bubble and Mr Bubble.

unicorn · 22/02/2005 19:14

I am so sad for you, on what should have been a double celebration.

Wishing you all the love and support that you need.
Please be kind to each other in the coming days/months/years.

franke · 22/02/2005 19:16

So sorry for you all. Welcome to little Elijah. Every moment is so precious. xx

pixiefish · 22/02/2005 19:16

So very sad for what has happened to Bo xxx

So happy that Elijah is ok

Dahlia · 22/02/2005 19:23

Congratulations and deepest sympathy too. Rest in peace, sweet little Bo. Love to you both, I'm so, so sorry. xxxxxx

Mosschops30 · 22/02/2005 19:24

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