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Bereavement

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How long did you take off before going back to work when your mum died?

80 replies

december2020 · 04/03/2024 09:59

My job very kindly gave me 3 weeks paid leave.
I am very grateful for that.

I am back at work now but I am not ready!

Mum died very unexpectedly and I'm still in some very dark places with grief, but it comes on so unexpectedly that I can't plan for it, and I'm finding it really hard to balance work and kids alongside it.

How long did you take off before going back to work after your mum died?
Am I being irrational and needy to feel like I need more time?

OP posts:
Motheroffourdragons · 04/03/2024 22:41

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ on behalf of the poster.

HollyKnight · 04/03/2024 22:43

I'm sorry for your loss, OP. If you waited until you felt ready to go back, you would probably have to be off for years.

I took a month off when my mum died. Then spent another month bursting into tears every time someone asked me how I was. Working was a bit of a distraction at least. I didn't feel like I was making any progress at home.

mitogoshi · 04/03/2024 22:48

Dp came home the day his mum died and I left as soon as I could, an hour or so after we got the news, a Friday - he went back to work Monday but he is the boss and could make phone calls, use the laptop etc - figured being at home was not any better plus the ladies in the office looked after him in the tea department!

It's very different if you are public facing, factory based or similar where you can't work at lower capacity. It also wasn't a complete surprise (wasn't expected but not a shock)

Durdledore · 04/03/2024 22:51

TulipTuesday · 04/03/2024 21:01

I was already half way through a weeks annual leave when my DM died on the Thursday.

I felt I couldn’t take any more time off. We were always short staffed at work and I was a supervisor so the pressure was on to always be there. So I went back in on the Monday.

I really do regret doing that, I bottled up a lot of emotion and kept going through each day robotically acting like it was all fine. I didn’t really stop and if I’m honest 6 years on I have seriously done a number on my mental health.

I wish I’d taken the time and the support.

Never too late @TulipTuesday ❤️

MintyCedric · 04/03/2024 22:53

I’m guessing from your post this is your first day back?

If so, I’d try and carry on for a bit. your world has just spun on its axis and moved 3cm to the left so doing anything normal will feel weird, but if your employer and colleagues are supportive you may find it less awful than being at home.

There’s no time limit if in a couple of weeks you’re still really struggling.

But as a PP said, grief can creep up on you when you least expect it even months and year after your loss.

Take care of yourself.

TheCatOnMorrisseysHead · 04/03/2024 22:54

I'm so sorry for your loss. Please take what you need, your GP will sign you off. And if you have an approachable boss maybe contact them and explain how you're feeling... you may well be able to return in a phased fashion so that you do only as much as you can manage for a while. That might help. Thinking of you.

Icepinkeskimo · 04/03/2024 23:22

For everyone who has gone through the loss of someone close, it’s devastating. Sorry for your loss doesn’t even cover it, it is possibly the most awful life event anyone goes through.
Nothing ever prepares you for the absolute despair that you go through and there is no time limit on how long grief can just kick you down without warning.
Everything changes, life goes on but it seems our world has tilted, some days it’s a fight to even get out of bed and get dressed.
I lost my beautiful mum a few months ago, I went from being “together” to a complete basket case. My work went out the window, I was so filled with grief, guilt, and sorrow I didn’t even care. It wasn’t until I thought what would mum be saying to me about how low I’ve sunk. I knew she would be livid with me, and telling me to pull myself together. I trained long and hard for my profession, I literally had to force myself to get out of bed and turn up and be present in my role.
Today was a long and stressful day, I was fully focused, I had to swipe away any grief or sadness.
When I’m home it’s different anything can trigger me off, I return to crying my heart out. My life feels empty, apart from work and that’s the truth of it.
There is something fundamentally wrong with employers saying a set period of time is allowed for bereavement. In fact it’s disgraceful and cruel.
No person is ever going to bounce back in a few days, grief is like a catastrophic mental and physical trauma. For anyone feeling pressured into returning to work I urge you to see your GP, and get signed off. I feel so strongly about this I believe there should be legislation regarding this.

DistinguishedSocialCommentator · 04/03/2024 23:24

2 weeks 43 years ago this month. I'd recently started work in London been there for a few weeks and mum died in an accident while on hols.

Mother87 · 04/03/2024 23:27

SpringtimeAtLast · 04/03/2024 10:39

No you aren’t being irrational. Grief will come at you with a whole range of emotions, you can’t plan for how it will affect you.

My mum died of an aneurysm - collapsed in my arms one sunny afternoon and was dead two days later.

I honestly think I could sunk into a pit of despair and stayed there forever. My best friend, my mum, the wisest kindest most beloved grandmother to my children - just gone like that, with no time for a proper goodbye. It was so sudden I was the only one who saw her in hospital before she died - my dh didn’t even pop in because he was looking after the kids. So it was just me at the bedside for those two days, waiting for her body to finally find some peace.

Unfortunately I was about to start a new job so I only had two days to “recover” after that - new employer didn’t do any kind of favours to new joiners on probation.

So I was at work making nice and learning my new job in the daytime, then over at my mum’s place in the evenings cleaning the kitchen, doing her laundry and sobbing the entire time. I had only just weaned my toddler so there was the added trouble of two young bereaved kids to deal with (“why isn’t granny coming for dinner with us today, when will she be better, is she on holiday”). My dc2 still asks me when the doctors will make granny better even though he hasn’t seen her for a year.

What I remember most was exhaustion and being unable to face any social situations for a long time - about 15 months. The only things I did were for my kids, and then it was just going through the motions.

Luckily my dh was amazing, and I will forever be grateful to him for the emotional sticking plasters and the encouragement to “take each day as it comes”, “put one step in front of the other”, “here’s a cup of tea, I’m taking the kids to see PIL so you can have the weekend to go to church and cry and then mow the lawn at your mum’s house”.

There was a lot of tough love in there, but I think it pushed me through those first six months.

I did try to find a grief counsellor but after three of them blanked my email enquiries I gave up and did my own thing.

I am still absolutely heartbroken but I’ve found a way to keep going. Not sure if this is helpful as I honestly think every situation is different and the only advice I can give is, do what YOU need to do. Only you can know what that is.

Oh that's so so sad Springtime - no words reallyFlowers

DillDanding · 04/03/2024 23:32

I took no time off. My mum died at about 6am and I was working by 8. This was during a lockdown though, so there’s nowhere I could’ve been. Working was a welcome distraction although had it not been in a pandemic, I would have gone to be with my dad.

I could’ve had a week off special leave from work, but I didn’t take it.

Fizbosshoes · 04/03/2024 23:33
Flowers sorry for your loss OP , and everyone else. There sound some very harsh and unsympathetic workplace set ups.

I guess I was fortunate that I wasn't working when my DM died. I was a SAHM with DC who were 1 and 4 (4 year old at school) . It felt very hard because they didn't really understand....but I didn't have to sort myself out, or "present" to work colleagues if that makes sense.

PlaceYourBetsPlease · 04/03/2024 23:36

I also had three weeks off after my mum died unexpectedly.

It wasn't long enough and looking back I was probably quite unwell for a hood six months after. I wish I'd known then I could get signed off by the GP.

Fifthtimelucky · 04/03/2024 23:36

My mother died on a Friday. By coincidence, I had booked the following week off work, because it was half term and my children were still quite young. So I had that week off as planned and then went back to work.

The only other day I had off was the day of the funeral.

I was one of her two executors so I spent much of the week off organising death certificate, registering death, planning funeral, sorting things out with bank, contacting estate agents etc. Personally I found it helped to keep busy.

2024theplot · 04/03/2024 23:39

So sorry for your loss. Everyone experiences grief differently.
Your GP may be able to sign you off work if you're struggling (but maybe check your company's sick pay policy first as statutory sick pay isn't great) or if you have annual leave left then perhaps take some of that? I know some people who have taken unpaid leave when they've lost a loved one unexpectedly so that may be an option too.

Hahahe · 04/03/2024 23:40

N0Tfunny · 04/03/2024 21:17

I took one day off, that’s all I was allowed as I worked in the NHS. We only got three days if you were next of kin and arranging the funeral ( and that was my sibling ).

I’m a single parent and I couldn’t afford to get signed off and risk losing my job.

Surely if you had needed more you could have got signed off for up to six months on full pay?

2024theplot · 04/03/2024 23:43

Hahahe · 04/03/2024 23:40

Surely if you had needed more you could have got signed off for up to six months on full pay?

NHS don't pay six months full pay unless you've been there over six years

PinkArt · 04/03/2024 23:46

Just over a week. I'm freelance and the company I was at were incredibly supportive but I didn't want to risk them replacing me on the project. I also wanted to keep myself busy as I didn't feel sitting at home feeling sad was going to help me process my grief - I think it could have taken me to quite a dark place.

Sending yo support to anyone dreading this coming Sunday.

Ladyj84 · 04/03/2024 23:50

3 days work gave paid the other 2 I had to take unpaid. It was so hard arranging funeral,papers,dealing with loss in just 3 days

DietrichandDiMaggio · 05/03/2024 00:18

Hahahe · 04/03/2024 23:40

Surely if you had needed more you could have got signed off for up to six months on full pay?

Surely nobody would expect six months off work on full pay because a parent had died? Loss of a child I can understand not being able to function in that sort of timeframe, but not a parent. Don't get me wrong, I understand grieving for a long time, but not being unable to carry on with normal life.

EcstaticMarmalade · 05/03/2024 08:29

DietrichandDiMaggio · 05/03/2024 00:18

Surely nobody would expect six months off work on full pay because a parent had died? Loss of a child I can understand not being able to function in that sort of timeframe, but not a parent. Don't get me wrong, I understand grieving for a long time, but not being unable to carry on with normal life.

What about things like PTSD though? I definitely struggled day to day for longer than that, there was just so much less known about PTSD at the time and I didn’t know what was going on.

So I soldiered on and as a result of that I’m still impacted, when if I’d taken longer off and been able to deal with it at the time that some of those later issues might have been avoided or mitigated.

The circumstances of my mum’s death were traumatic in themselves but it was also affected by the background to the relationship- traumatic childhood events (my dad was abusive to my mum) were a big feature and her death brought those back to the surface.

Lots of things that had never previously been dealt with properly came to a head. It made what was then unknown pre-existing C-PTSD absolutely uncopeable.

And late diagnosed neurodivergence (which she likely shared) has also since clearly become that part of that mix.

Losing my mum meant losing the only person who really understood me and accepted me. This meant the loss of the only person I could unmask around. That was extremely disruptive to all my coping mechanisms that previously got me through.

Whilst so many people
especially women, don’t receive help for things like trauma and neurodivergence at an appropriate age, events like parental deaths are going to act as catalysts for those things which are seemingly under the surface to emerge.

As well as sometimes parental deaths come along in the midst of as other huge life events like birth of a child or divorce or menopause or loss of a job or a health event like a heart attack.

Deaths don’t happen in isolation from other parts of life.

honeyandfizz · 05/03/2024 10:39

Sorry for your loss OP. My Dad died last April - sudden horrid death in hospital (now have a clinical negligence case out against the NHS Trust). I am a Nurse and took 8 weeks off and even after that I struggled to mentally function, work gave me a weeks compassionate leave and then my GP signed me off. I was in shock and my brain sort of shut down and I felt a danger to myself and my patients - I then had a months graduated return which helped enormously.

N0Tfunny · 05/03/2024 12:11

Hahahe · 04/03/2024 23:40

Surely if you had needed more you could have got signed off for up to six months on full pay?

In fact I did have long service but I’d have to be actually sick to get my GP to sign me off sick. As opposed to busy with lots of post death admin or grieving - neither of which are illnesses. ( I’m just talking about myself here, I’m not denying that other people do suffer from clinical depression , PTSD or other illness after a bereavement ). It’s just I didn’t.

Also if you run up a bad sickness record it makes you vulnerable for redundancy every time there is a reorganisation. Rightly or wrongly, there’s more sympathy for people who have been off sick for 6 months for cancer/ major surgery / serious illness than for those who take 6 months off with “ stress” .

If I had done that I would have referred pretty quickly to occupational health - I had the worlds most unsympathetic manager. Eg once I applied for a days annual leave to attend my Gf funeral but Fiona refused as it was too short notice - all requests are only considered monthly.

So I applied for one day compassionate leave and she told me I could only have a half day because the funeral was in the afternoon. So I had to go to work from 8am - noon and then drive like crazy to get to the funeral for 1pm ( it was an hours drive from work ).

Some years later, one of my children became very ill so I had to take some compassionate leave ( I think it was a max of 2 weeks) but I needed more so had to get signed off sick ( I had mo choice, my child was terminally ill in hospital ).

BTW I had about 15 years service at that time and about one day a year sickness absence.

That same manager phoned me up at home and demanded to know when I was coming back to work. I told her that my child’s consultant had said they probably only had days not weeks left . So she phoned me up again a week later and asked again when I was coming back to work, I explained that my child was still with us but it would probably be a few days now.

She exclaimed angrily “ But you said that last week! “ .

When my child finally died, she sent me an appointment to attend occupational health a few days later ( in the week between the death and the funeral ). She said I would face disciplinary action if I didn’t attend, I got a letter saying they had offered me several appointments but they had been “ unsuitable “ ( no mention of the reason why ).

Apparently my normal sick note from GP was not enough , the GP had to send a special kind of sick note called a “ soul and conscience letter”.

I went to the appointment about a week after the funeral , the doctor at occupational health was appalled and signed me off for 3 months and then I was to go back with a phased return.

I got a job in another part of the NHS and the manager got promoted.

Hahahe · 05/03/2024 19:09

@N0Tfunny I'm so, so sorry for the loss of your child. Your manager sounds awful. It's hard to imagine that anyone could be that unkind.

ladybee2 · 05/03/2024 19:13

When my wonderful Mum died, my manager phoned me to ask if I was coming back later that week ( they'd turned life support off an hour before). I'm a teacher and it was the deputy head who rang me....Just about sums it up!

ladybee2 · 05/03/2024 19:14

I took a week- then found out in my next pay slip that they'd deducted my pay!!