Anyone had success trying to contact a dead loved one?

[Cafeaulait27]

It’s a bit woo woo and normally I’m not like this but I lost my dad very unexpectedly recently and I am overcome with grief and sadness. I want to talk to him so badly but obviously know that’s not possible, but also at times I feel so desperate that I look into psychic mediums.

just wondered if anyone has ever had any success contacting a loved one either through a medium or other means, or has had them visit in some way?

I feel like I’m going mad but I’m literally desperate to see him again x

Sorry…pistes too soon… what I did find helpful was emailing / messaging him my thoughts/feelings at times. He died 2 and a half years ago, but I still talk to him every day. Just be kind to yourself, and don’t get drawn to people who don’t have your best interests at heart x

I don't want to derail the thread any further but I find posters like @donquixotedelamancha so staggeringly ignorant. Who are we to say that the pinicle of understanding has been reached? The fact that we simply don't know anything about life after death is what makes the allure of charlatans so strong - but that doesn't mean that something or someone isn't there.

Pinicle =pinacle

not only is this impossibly intrusive, but...
if you or anyone else at the funeral had then gone to her, trying to 'make contact'....well, she would have gained an awful lot of useful information, wouldn't she.

I am so very sorry to hear about your dad x.

Just go and do it. What have you got to lose xxx

@donquixotedelamancha isn't the one who is displaying ignorance here

@Cafeaulait27 I'm very, very sorry for your loss. But please don't waste your money in the belief that you will be able to contact your dad through a spiritualist or medium.

so staggeringly ignorant. Who are we to say that the pinicle of understanding has been reached?

Nobody has said that. Believing you can't know anything because you don't know everything is ignorant. We 'know' that someone taking money from you to contact the dead is a con artist because there is no evidence that it's true and it doesn't fit with the huge amounts we do know about how the world works.

Sometimes we are wrong about things we think we know but it is evidence which shows us that- unless you willfully choose ignorance.

@Puppylucky

I agree.

These people are liars, con-artists & crooks who cynically prey on the bereaved and the suggestible. They are beneath contempt.

Your dad lives on in the memories of those who knew him and loved him when he was alive.

OP - half of you is your Dad. He raised you all those years, and physically half of all you are comes from him. Nobody can take that away and in that sense you can never be entirely parted. 💐

Well yes indeed, they just pray on the vulnerable and repeat information they’ve been told (of which they could gain a lot at a funeral) or statements so generic that you’d be hard pressed not to nod along… “your husband wants you to know it’ll be okay….” kind of thing. Not thing specific, like there’s a winning lottery ticket in the fourth book from the left on the middle bookcase on the landing ;)

@StillWeRise That's a beautiful poem thank you for sharing. I lost my wonderful dad a few years ago those words really touched me.

I'm so sorry for your loss OP my dad's death wasn't unexpected so I can only imagine the additional distress that would cause.

Would writing a letter to your dad help? Sometimes just writing down the questions and things you want to say can help even though you know you can't get a response x
Please don't spend money on these people they will prey on your vulnerability and you are unlikely to feel any better after it x

OP, don't pay anyone, don't get drawn into any groups where you might meet people who want to take advantage. Stay safe.

Get some bereavement counselling. If you have faith, pray.

Speak to your dad, wherever you are, whatever you are doing. He is not bound by space and time now.

Will he answer? In his and your time together, you heard a lot of what he had to say. You'll remember his words and his attitudes.

My mum died in 2014. I have an ongoing communication with her - probably imaginary but it suits me. I speak to her (usually in my head but not always) and she might or might not respond. She's become expert in providing white feathers, in quantity. There must be some half-naked birds around our way.

Your grief is raw now but you'll settle into the new way of things, and find comfort in the relationship again.

When my mum died I was sure that, if there was any form of afterlife, she would let me know how she was getting on and what kind of flowers there were in heaven. She was a Catholic and a mad keen gardener. She believed that when she died she would see her mum again.

So I kept listening for her voice in my ear, or the sensation of her presence, or her hand in mine. But it never came.

And time passed and I dealt with her absence as best I could, remembering her often, seeing her in my sister, talking about her with my brothers. And then one day, as I was ding a bit of weeding in the garden, I was reminded of her and although I didn't feel her presence, and she didn't talk to me, suddenly I felt a joy in the memories

And that was how she came back to me. Not in a woo-woo way, but in a way I hadn't expected, gentle, happy, comforting. My wife died 18 months ago and I am only now starting to climb out of the despair. And again with her, I am open to letting her come to me when she and I are both ready for it, to relive a little of the joy we had and remember how lucky I was that she chose me to be happy with

I hope you find your dad again in whatever way works for you

I lost my Dad suddenly and unexpectedly a couple of months ago. I never got the chance to say goodbye and I miss talking to him and all his quirks so much. I can barely cope with going to his grave because it makes it all too real. But please don’t entertain thoughts of mediums or psychics. It’s all utter, utter rubbish and they’re con artists who should be prosecuted for preying on vulnerable people.

You Dad is with you. He is in your heart and he is in your memories.

If there was any such thing as the afterlife don't you think that loved ones would find a way to contact you without meaning you have to pay money to some lowlife who is happy to exploit people at their most vulnerable.

Money. That’s what you lose. These people aren’t wonderful psychics/mediums who just want to help people get in touch with their loved ones. They’re fraudsters who prey on the grief of people who desperately want to believe their loved ones can still talk to them.

A better way to spend that money would be donating it to a charity in your father’s memory, or even a day trip to a place where memories of him exist. And if you do want to talk to him, please don’t let some cruel fraudster charge you for it. Find a place where you have memories of him and talk to him.

I mean even the stuff mentioned ‘she knew the name of a cat’ etc. Even if that’s true what does it matter? You already know all that stuff, someone else telling you it won’t make the loss of a beloved father any less painful.

Thank you all. I think I’ll leave it and just talk to him myself when I need to. Maybe he can hear me, maybe I’m just talking to myself I don’t know,

it’s so hard when loved ones die, I feel like I want to go back in time.

I agree with this poster @Tania64 I have seen a medium at my local spiritual church, a few times, and had excellent readings, DH thought it was a load of rubbish, came along to try to prove it was rubbish, left a believer, I think a lot of people that speak with negativity towards mediumship, haven’t seen a good medium, go through your local spiritualist church would be my advice. So sorry for your loss OP .

I’m sorry but it is demonstrably complete nonsense. There’s no such thing as mediums who can talk to the dead so please don’t try to persuade grieving people that there are. There are con artists who tell vulnerable bereaved people what they want to hear. Some, I’m sure, even believe they’re talking to the dead. They’re not. I can understand why some people read horoscopes for a bit of harmless fun. But pretending to contact the dead isn’t harmless fun, it’s cruel and wrong.

I’m sorry for your loss. I lost my Dad in November and I just miss him so much. I don’t believe in an afterlife. It’s hard, because I’d love to think he was somewhere watching us all…and like you, I just wish there was a way to communicate with him.

Like pp, I often think about what I would say to him - it’s painful when there is something I want to share with him.

I recently bought his favourite tree and planted it in my garden. It has blossomed straight away and looks incredible, whilst all the other things I’ve planted are still taking their time. I don’t really believe he’s around, but I still have a little wry smile to myself when I see it and think the ol’ bugger must have something to do with it. It makes me feel better. I find sharing these thoughts with people who cared about him helps. We have a WhatsApp made up of my mum and siblings and we often talk or joke about what Dad would say or do. We blame him for plenty of things too!

They’re con artists or at best, delusional. There is lots of information out there about the tricks they employ. I’ve no doubt they offer comfort to some people though.

My lovely mum died horribly, over a year ago. We were very close. I’ve felt nothing, seen no signs, nothing. Yes I see robins everywhere but they were probably always there and I just didn’t notice them. I’m trying to console myself with her being ever present in my memories and my dna. Perhaps there is an afterlife, I really hope so. Otherwise what was the bloody point. But I don’t believe the person is still in this world, vibrating on another plane or any of that nonsense.

I agree with this. Mediums are fake and target vulnerable people, and it is sickening.

Please, please don’t go there. You will still be grieving and have lost money too.

So sorry for your loss.

I'm so sorry you have lost your Dad. Losing a parent is really hard. Grief and pain is part of it I'm afraid.
Speak to a grief counsellor rather than a medium.
A friend of mine sought comfort in mediums after the death of her mother. She'd died of breast cancer. The medium told her that the message from her Mum was not to worry about getting cancer, it wouldn't happen to her. Sadly both she and her sister are now having treatment for cancer and I wonder a bit if this lie/false reassurance from the medium stopped them getting their actual risk checked.
If you're desperate for reassurance, what you get told may be not just unhelpful but possibly harmful.
Be careful. Grief can be overwhelming, but it does get easier to live with.

@Cafeaulait27 , @CockingASnook and others who’ve recently lost parents, I send my love and sympathy. I lost my mum very suddenly and it took me at least a year to find my feet again.

Talking to her helped. So did having a photo on the shelf of her laughing - a constant visual reminder of her joy, not my grief. On significant anniversaries I spend what I would have on cards/gifts/flowers on a cause I know she’d have supported. Even though she died, she’s still doing good in the world, which comforts me.

Be kind to yourselves, and I’m so sorry for your loss.