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Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

My son is dying

690 replies

blindspots · 21/01/2021 17:53

This is fucking cancer. He is 2. We are only 3 months from diagnosis and we are out of active treatment options.

I hate cancer, I hate the pandemic disrupting our world and keeping us from people we love.

He has been so tough she and strong and there is nothing more they can do, the cancer just keeps coming back.

I would give everything to keep him

OP posts:
catgirl1976 · 21/01/2021 20:12

I am so deeply sorry.

mylovelydd · 21/01/2021 20:13

I'm so deeply sorry Flowers

Sarcobaleno · 21/01/2021 20:13

I am so very sorry. Your heart must feel broken. I am sending you and your family love.

Igmum · 21/01/2021 20:14

So sorry OP sending love ❤️ Thanks

minmooch · 21/01/2021 20:15

I'm so sorry to read your posts. Cancer is truly evil but particularly when it hits children. I lost my son to a brain tumour nearly 7 years ago. He had 2 and half years from diagnosis to his death. He was 18 and very aware of what was happening to him. It was truly horrendous changing our mindsets from giving him the best life to trying to find the best death for him - something no parent should have to ever face.

I lived afterwards for my surviving child, to let him know that his life mattered just as much. Eventually I started to live for myself again. It's hard, grief is hard, living without your child is hard. And will be forever. But there is still beauty in life, and over time you learn to allow yourself to see the beauty and enjoy aspects of it.

I will never be the same again. But it's a long journey and there are others on this site, and in real life, who have walked the same path. We find strength in each other. We find a way to go on to honour our missing child. It seems impossible at times, the guilt is sometimes overwhelming. But the rawness is a little less raw as time goes on.

You will find strength with loved ones. And often strength from complete strangers.

There is no easy way to face this. It's truly heartbreaking and incredibly unfair.

But you will learn to walk again with your son in your heart, he will never leave you.

I'm so sorry you have to face this. There are no right words for such a terrible thing to be happening.

We took our son to a hospice for his last few days where we could just be with him. Your son will know he is surrounded by love, as my son did.

Gentle hugs xx

namemychange · 21/01/2021 20:15

I am so so sorry xx

Honeyroar · 21/01/2021 20:16

I’m so sorry. That really is heartbreaking.☹️

pastacaring · 21/01/2021 20:17

So sorry to hear this. I can't even imagine how you feel right now. My thoughts are with you and your family.

KaptainKaveman · 21/01/2021 20:17

Sending you all love 💘 and prayers OP. I'm very sorry Flowers

itsme7 · 21/01/2021 20:18

I’m so sorry for you and your family. Rob Delaney writes and speaks beautifully about the grief of his son dying if his words might help offer some small tiny piece of comfort x

NelAntarctic · 21/01/2021 20:20

OP, there are no words for your sorrow. Sending strength and love. @minmooch and @AquaTorfana I send you strength and love too.

MayYouLiveInInterestingTimes · 21/01/2021 20:21

I am so sorry Flowers. Fuck cancer.

Woahisme · 21/01/2021 20:21

Sending you big hugs, this is absolutely heartbreaking. Love to you and your family Flowers

Phipps91 · 21/01/2021 20:22

My heart goes out to you and your family! I'm soo sorry ❤️❤️❤️

2018SoFarSoGreat · 21/01/2021 20:22

@blindspots I'm crying reading your words. So sorry. Not that those words help, but there are no good words, really.

Praying for you and lovely boy, and this time.

Changednamesorry · 21/01/2021 20:25

I am so sorry. There's no words. Flowers

WitchesBritchesPumpkinPants · 21/01/2021 20:25

Cancer is a bastard & life is unfair

Big love to you all xxx
💐

ParkheadParadise · 21/01/2021 20:26
Flowers
liverpool1981 · 21/01/2021 20:26

Prayers for your little boy tonight.x Can I ask his name if you don't mind x I am so sorry for you, your little boy and your whole family x

pantherrose · 21/01/2021 20:27

OP, I read your post at the beginning when you had just a couple of good people who replied. I wasn’t that brave as I just didn’t know what to say, so I prayed. You are going through every mothers worst nightmare and all I can do is continue to hold you and your son in my thoughts and prayers. Sending you much love, strength and healing Flowers

Chutneymaura · 21/01/2021 20:28

I am so so sorry. Sending you love and strength x

georgarina · 21/01/2021 20:29

I'm so, so sorry. Life can be so unfair. Sending all the love and hugs to you and your family Flowers

anomletteandaglassofwine · 21/01/2021 20:32

I'm so, so sorry. It is so incredibly unfair. Sending you lots of love x

Elmo311 · 21/01/2021 20:33

So sorry for you, tell us more about him? X

PearlescentIridescent · 21/01/2021 20:33

Oh my dear. Even the huge gut wrenching tears your news has given me as a stranger must be a pale glimmer of what you're going through.

I wish with all my heart that there could be a different outcome for you all. There aren't words in existence I think, that describe the pain of losing a child.

I hope you can find love and light in raising your other children and honouring the memory of your little one, when the time comes.

How can life be this way. I'm truly sorry, so sorry.

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