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Original poster

My mother found my father dead this morning

99 replies

milfAKAmonkeymonkeymoomoo · 03/09/2007 19:43

After two MC in three months, the last only a month ago I had a phonecall this morning to say my dearly beloved father died unexpectedly this morning. My Mum found him in his armchair in the lounge as if asleep.

I am gutted, gutted, gutted... too much to take on board especially after my two MCs

OP posts:
MrsWeasley · 03/09/2007 22:43

oh how dreadful

lilolilmanchester · 03/09/2007 22:52

I'm so sorry. I lost my Dad just after I'd had a MC. Just when I thought I couldn't hurt any more. Totally numb for a while, walked around like everything around me wasn't real. Understand a little of what you're going through, but I know that doesn't make it any easier for you right now. Take care of yourself, as well as your Mum.

Original poster
milfAKAmonkeymonkeymoomoo · 04/09/2007 00:49

Can't sleep, too scared to sleep, forgotten how lonely the night can be.

OP posts:
jules99 · 04/09/2007 01:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mummy2TandF · 04/09/2007 01:49

Oh Milf - I am so sorry, I know exacty what you are going through Incase you haven't read my thread my dh died suddenly and without cause on Tuesday He was only 36 ... I know the shock and disbelieve that you must be feeling My thoughts are with you

Califrau · 04/09/2007 01:53

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

slim22 · 04/09/2007 01:57

milk so sorry for your loss
mummy2TandF [shok]

mymama · 04/09/2007 03:34

So sorry to hear this . My thoughts are with you and your family.

belgo · 04/09/2007 08:27

how are you today milf?

BecauseImWorthIt · 04/09/2007 08:34

So sorry

My mum died at 66, after 5 years of cancer treatment. She thought she was getting better when it returned with a vengeance, and it was horrible to see her suffering as she did, even though she put a very brave face on it all.

It still came as a shock, though, so I can't imagine how you must be feeling.

Just make sure that you are kind to yourself and allow yourself to grieve in any way that you want to.

Jackstini · 04/09/2007 11:26

Oh no Milf - I had been with you on the miscarriage threads and can't beleive you now have this bad news too, I am so sorry that your heart has been broken too many times recently.
The saying goodbye thing is very personal and only you can decide if you want to do it at the funeral or before as well (you don't have to see the body if you don't want to)
Am glad you saw your Dad on Saturday, that you had such a good relationship and that he was a lovely Grandad to your dd. Your memories are happy ones - hang on to this in your heart and I hope you are all being taken good care of x

SleeplessInTheStaceym11House · 04/09/2007 11:32

im so sorry for your loss, thinking of you all!

Twinkie1 · 04/09/2007 11:38

Oh God that is terrible - sending you lots of love and my sympathies.

Tx

Lcy · 04/09/2007 18:49

Hi Milf - i am so sorry to hear about your dad. How awful for you and i can imagine that it is alot to take on board especially after 2 miscarriages.

My dad died suddenly of a stroke 2 years ago. My mum found him collapsed. I decided to see my dad before he was cremated because i was having a hard time realising he had actually died (i lived away and so wasnt used to seeing him everyday). It is definately a personal decision (my other siblings decided not to) - it helped me to see his body and realise he had gone. When i had my mc i just couldnt believe it - so much sadness.

I will be thinking of you and your family at this difficult time.

Lucy xx

Original poster
milfAKAmonkeymonkeymoomoo · 23/09/2007 22:29

Not had a chance to thank everyone for your kind messages, I always find it amazing that strangers can be so kind (more so than some people I know in RL!)

OP posts:
geekgirl · 24/09/2007 18:30

oh milf I am so sorry What dreadful news for you, and he was so young still

fawkeoff · 24/09/2007 18:33

oh hun so sorry x

fireflyfairy2 · 24/09/2007 18:35

You have my deepest condolences.

What a terrible thing for your poor mother.

Wishing her strength for the upcoming days.

OrmIrian · 24/09/2007 18:36

So sorry. That is awful

yogabird · 24/09/2007 18:42

just read this. So sorry. I hope things are less raw now for you. Dh went to a funeral recently and the service included the following which i thought was lovely but it made me cry.

What is dying?

The ship sails and I stand watching til she fades from the horizon and someone at my side says, 'she is gone'. Gone where? Gone from my sight, that is all; she is just as large as when i saw her. The diminished size and total loss of sight is in me, not in her and just at the moment when someone at my side says, 'she is gone', there are others who are watching her coming and other voices take up a glad shout, 'there she comes' and that is dying

Whooosh · 24/09/2007 18:45

So sorry to read this.
I lost my Mum at 60 when I was 8.5mts pregnant so I fully sympathise

ScummyMummy · 24/09/2007 18:48

I'm very sorry to hear this.

xXxamyxXx · 24/09/2007 18:48

really sorry

Original poster
milfAKAmonkeymonkeymoomoo · 24/09/2007 19:18

Yogabird - we had that read at my dad's service, he was a keen service so we thought it was appropriate.

Finding this all so hard still but I know its early days.

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