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Bereavement

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters. See also your choices after baby loss.

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Original poster

Can we not do something for ggg?

88 replies

Rhubarb · 04/01/2007 17:14

I feel very deeply affected by the tragic loss of her youngest daughter. I wonder if there is anything we could do collectively? Does anyone have any good ideas? I'm willing to do all the organising.

OP posts:

MerlinsBeard · 04/01/2007 17:16

was thinking the same but don't know her well enough, just recognise her screen name. I would like to be involved though if i can.

LucyJones · 04/01/2007 17:18

a fund for some flowers to be delivered from Mumsnetters maybe? Or vouchers for a shop at a supermarket just to make the next few weeks slightly easier?

MerlinsBeard · 04/01/2007 17:19

ihave to go but will check back later on. Supermarket delivery maybe? she may not feel or be able to get to shops

SherlockLGJ · 04/01/2007 17:26

Maybe we should leave it a few days.

nearlymybeetrootday · 04/01/2007 17:28

agree Sherlock - nothing we can do will help at present.

tribpot · 04/01/2007 17:28

Agree with LGJ we don't want to be contacting ggg at the moment but we could start raising funds and then decide what to do with them later?

piglit · 04/01/2007 17:29

Perhaps as a first step all the bickering could stop on other threads. It just seems so wrong for Mnetters to be bickering and engaging in slanging matches when something so awful has happened to GGG.

hunkermunker · 04/01/2007 17:34

That was my first thought when I read Beety's shocking post - what can we do. I know nothing we can actually do will bring her darling DD back, but I would like to do something to let her know how many people are thinking of her - but only if people who are closer to her think that is appropriate. Perhaps we ought to be guided by them.

Blu · 04/01/2007 17:34

I think we should take our time, and be at the ready to respond like lightening the minute we can actually be of help...be it flowers, a beautiful book of all our wishes and condolences, practical help with food or travel costs, or whatever emerges.

I have wondered about a collective MN marking of the loss of a child though. No help to poor Ggg, but a 2 minute posting silence, or something. So that we do something together, think together at the same moment, of Ggg, her family and her little girl.

Yorkiegirl · 04/01/2007 17:37

Message withdrawn

nearlymybeetrootday · 04/01/2007 17:42

I am in contact with her - and when it is right I will tell her everyone is thinking of her.

She and her family are heartbroken and at present there is nothing we can do but keep her in our thoughts - imo.

I really don't think we need to start collecting money!

Paddlechick666 · 04/01/2007 17:43

i don't know ggg but would like to be involved in any idea that people come up with.

despite now knowing her my heart has broken for her on hearing this news.

when the time is right and an appropriate idea is decided upon i am sure ggg will take some comfort from it.

i know i would even from MN-ers i didn't know.....

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 04/01/2007 17:47

I don't think a posting silence would necessarily work as not everyone would read this post, or the other one, people could happen upon the site during that time etc. I do wonder if we could initially start a book of condolence, someone could create one of those internet guest books and all who felt they wanted to could sign it and she could read it when she feels up to doing so. It would be different to a post like this one as people would sign it once whereas on a forum messages go to and fro iyswim.

I also wonder if it would be appropriate for mn towers to put something on the homepage, any loss is tragic, but the loss of a child is doubly devostating IMO because none of us expect to outlive our children, especially not when they're so young.

in terms of financial contributions I do agree that maybe best to leave it a few days, and then maybe instead of flowers, a tree perhaps? or, and some may think this is perhaps a bit ott, but what about if we could raise enough money to get a star named after her dd.

Original poster

Rhubarb · 04/01/2007 17:48

Beetroot, thanks. I do want to do something for her though. I know right now she probably wants to be left alone, but I met ggg and her dd, we used to be in close contact. I feel so helpless and just want to do something to let her know that we are thinking of her.

She doesn't have much of an extended family and her dh only has his mother who has been very ill. So her friends will be very important to her.

I don't know what would be suitable, but thought that other MNers who have suffered similar bereavements might have a few ideas.

OP posts:

nearlymybeetrootday · 04/01/2007 17:50

R I have cat'd you.

Heathcliffscathy · 04/01/2007 17:50

rhuby. write to her.
]

]

Original poster

Rhubarb · 04/01/2007 17:51

I have to go. But just a gathering of ideas as to what would be appropriate might be nice.

OP posts:

Original poster

Rhubarb · 04/01/2007 17:52

sophable, I will do. Of course. But thought that as so many Mumsnetters knew her, we could do something as a group.

OP posts:

ledodgy · 04/01/2007 17:52

Maybe for now we could all light a candle on that virtual site. Does anybody have the link?

Blu · 04/01/2007 17:53

Wannabe, you are right, a posting silence would have to be co-ordinated by MNHQ and the page frozen by tech, with an explanation, or something.

No help to Ggg, but a focus for the grief felt by other MN-ers. So i was probably feeling self-indulgent.

It's so hard to feel for someone and be able to do nothing - even when doing nothing for the time being is what's best.

bossykate · 04/01/2007 17:53

i think for now we should take beety's advice and just leave it alone for a while.

kimi · 04/01/2007 17:58

at a time like this i think all anyone can do is be there when ask.
I can not imagion how the family feel, my heart goes out to them

PeachyClair · 04/01/2007 18:00

Oh no I missed that, poor poor woman.

If anyone organises something, PLEASE count me in- I am acatable or e-mailable if I miss this post

peaches and cream 04 at bt internet dot com

Dottydot · 04/01/2007 18:06

I like the idea of a tree planted by MNers in memory, or a virtual condolence book, if someone can set one up (my IT skills are non existent). But maybe let's be guided by Beetroot as to what's the best thing to do and best time to do it.

Piffle · 04/01/2007 18:06

Count me in for whatever is needed/decided.
On another site I used when a mums dd died. we all got together and named a star after her dd. Tokenism perhaps and for the future.
But at the present time, I cannot imagine anything that would provide any comfort.
But when GGG needs anything consider me there with a contribution.
I am just so gutted for her.

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