Do your family/friends acknowledge anniversary of a loss, or forget/ignore?

[charlieandlola]

My dad died 4 years ago today. Only me and my mum have talked about it. My dh/kids /friends have said nothing to me about it.

Is this normal or odd ?

I am actually ok today. Time is indeed proving a great healer for me at least .

Normal.
The date someone died isn't important to me, I prefer to remember them as they were when they were alive.
tbh, dates in general aren't that important to me - I'm not bothered by birthdays for example. I miss them more at times when I think "I wish Dad had been here to see this" or "Mum would have enjoyed being at this" type moments.
I'm aware we are all different, but I wouldn't expect wider family or friends to particularly remember dates people died unless it co-incidently happened to be on their birthday or something.

Normal sadly.

When my mum died for the first year I got lots of comments, cards etc but as time goes by (4 years next month) it gets mentioned less and less. I have one very good friend who always remembers and will get me some flowers on the day (I do the same for her on the anniversary of her DH's death) but apart from that no one would comment unless I were to bring it up.

I'm ok with it though, I always think of my lovely mum anyway, it's just another day if a tiny bit more raw.

I tend to follow the lead of the person who lost someone. Anniversaries are important for some people and not others. I know one friend for whom it's really important that we all talk about her son who was stillborn and remember his birthday. Another friend who lost a baby prefers not to.

I think it's pretty normal for people not to think in terms of a specific date, unless there is a particular reason why it would stick in their memory apart from the bereavement.

In fact, my Dad died just over two years ago. And I'd have to check on my phone to tell you the exact date, except that it was a week or two after his birthday, which is a date which I can remember without any effort.

If it was someone else's parent, I doubt I'd even remember that much detail, unless the time of year caught my attention.

For me it's things like his birthday, Fathers Day, Christmas, parents anniversary that make me 'notice' his loss that bit more fresh than usual, not the specific date on which he died.

Like other posters I would struggle to remember exactly when my Mum and Dad died. If it mattered to me I would have to remind them. I'm sorry but I also don't know the exact date my wife's parents died either.

What I do remember is when my twin died even though it was 5 decades ago!

MiL is good enough to take the children so I can go bury myself at the bottom of a bottle somewhere and DH is good enough to try to support me even though its not easy for him either. I can go numb the pain for a bit and return to being some form of functioning human being the next day. Its what I need.