As we go through this painful journey together

[lavandes]

As we go through this painful journey together we share, cry, scream and shout but we never judge, we know that there is always someone to listen. We always remember our precious children who will never be forgotten and will live on forever in our hearts.

Morning ladies xx

We had our grandsons (Richard's boys) for the weekend. Had a brilliant day on Saturday, in the middle night the eldest (14) woke with a bad asthma attack. I rang the out of hours NHS line and they said that they would see him at a clinic about 30 mins drive from us within 6 hours and they would ring me back when the doctor was there, you have to have an appointment. I was so scared as I've never seen him like this before. I didn't think this was good enough so I rang 999, an ambulance came in 8 mins and they gave him a nebuliser after which he was ok. If it happens again I will ring 999 first I can't lose anyone else. I don't know if the out of hours people answering the calls are qualified or are just reading notes. The ambulance men were brilliant and said I had done the right thing.

Oh my word Lavandes I bet you were petrified. You did right to ring 999 - children get ill (and better) so quickly dont they? Glad he is better - asthma is horrible - my Matt had it. xxxxx

Yes it was horrible. But he is ok now. It happened when he was staying with his other Grandma, she drove him to the hospital. His mother is going to try to find out if it is linked to going to different places, where the pollen etc is different and what we can do to prevent it happening again.

Oh my God MN is so frustrating at times. I know that cycling helmets are a big deal to me - Matt didnt have one on and the Police corner and Doctor told me his injuries would NOT have been fatal if he had one on. I shouldnt get involved in a thread where people dont listen.

I should stay away Shabs some people are just stupid . I also think that some people start this kind of thread to wind people up. I can't think of any other reason. xx

Yes you are right Lavandes. I last posted some time ago and just keep checking it - cant help it.

lavandes that must have been terrifying! Well done you for calling 999 when you weren't happy.

shabs we are off to Oz - where it will be heading into winter, just as the sun arrives here. Typical!! But some very excited family waiting for us there.

Btw, totally am with you on helmets. Xx

I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for all your losses.

I had a MC years ago, quite early on, but she was my baby, my first little girl and I miss her a lot.

We named her Yasmin. she would have just turned 4.

I know that having an MC is not the same as loosing a child that you have held and kissed etc, but I saw her at the 12 week scan, moving about and it was such a shock that 2 days later there was no heartbeat. she was gone.

I look at my beautiful and naughty boys and gorgeous girl and I love them so much, but our family will never be complete.

The morning I had ERPC the sky was crazy pink and I told my DH that it was her saying hello.
I told my boys afterwards.

now everytime the sky is pink the boys remind me that Yasmin is saying hello to us.
It's lovely. but how I miss her

Morning girls xx

Amazing thank you for your support on the 'thread where some do not listen to my warning' yesterday - I appreciate it. Very sorry for your loss xx

of course Shabba (and worry not about idiots who don't listen.)

I've read most of this thread last night crying my eyes out as I could identify with so many things.
I think it's shocking that people expect you and others to get back to normal months after the loss of your precious babies! or ever, really!
I never would have thought that, the insensitivity!

I know that my loss is not as great in a sense as most of yours here as I "only" had an MC, and I truly have not gone through as much suffering - so I kind of feel I shouldn't even be on this thread, IYSWIM.

But as I was told by a wise person that grief is not a competition and having lost a child is the worst thing no matter what age or circumstances.

I feel alone with my grief a lot, and I can't tell people in RL anymore (apart from 2 SILS, who also had MCs and DH) because having a MC doesn't even register as a real loss to a lot of people and even if it does, surely I should be over it by now!

I just want to give all of you a big hug.

You are so lovely to each other, you make your children proud!

Amazing this wonderful 'safe haven' thread was started....I think....about 6 years ago. It has been a 'place' where we have shared experiences, cried, lit candles for each childs birthday and 'remember day' and yes we have screamed, shouted, and laughed out loud as well.

There is no death so sad as that of a child....it doesn't matter how old that child is - this thread is just somewhere where we, sadly, have the knowledge that each person knows and identifies with others grief.

well, thank you Shabba I take that as an invitation to stay, if I may.

of course.....wish none of us had to be here but glad we have found each other x

Morning girls xx

Morning.......hope everybody is enjoying the sunshine xxx

morning all!

my DH had a bilateral hernia op yesterday, which went well.

Hopefully he can come home today.

Ouch!! Sounds painful - hope he is soon home.

Hello amazing and Shabba. I can report it is sunshine here too - and on a day warm enough for people in the UK to declare it summer, people here are worried about the cold!! But with the autumn leaves, it was definitely a Mia day... It is lovely to share Finn with the family, and watch them enjoying him. Worth every second of the jetlag.

Morning girls xx

Mia - did you put a pic on FBook of you in the airport? If it was you I WANT YOUR HAIR.....the colour, the cut - everything LOL xxx Sounds like you are having a good time x

good evening!
thanks shabba he's better now.

hi Mia!
I have to say that your beautiful letter about your little girl was one of the first things I ever read on MN ( I am relatively new) and I thought of her recently when my DD turned 13 months.

It's just heart wrenching to have that hole in your life.

would she be about 2 or 3 now? I can't remember.
and congratulations on Finn!

Morning girls xx

hey guys hope your bearing up

im ok just struggling with the social issues I normally find hard
so no change there then

hi amazing x
I've had two mc,both after seeing them on scans with hearts beating etc, as well as losing my ds after he was born too
so don't feel like you can't talk to us about your loss, they are all our children xx

thanks white that is how I feel. she was my little girl and will forever be. thanks for welcoming me.

after DD was born (last year) I made a necklaces with one crystal heart/ family member.
we each have a "colour" - for the kids it is the colour we used for their birth announcement cards, used at their christening as colour theme etc.
for DH it's dark blue, mine is a pinkish salmon colour as my favourite colour is "assigned" to DS3.

I name some of my jewellery based on what inspired me to create them. I'm not pretending to be a great artist, it's just something that pops in my head. for example I have Strawberry ice, Mexican twist, Beach baby etc.

this one with the rainbow hearts I call "Our Family".

It did not occur to me to exclude Yasmin from it, she is symbolized by a clear, colourless crystal - she'll be always pure as the white light arriving from the sun.
I wear this necklace on days when I miss her too much and feel comforted by the thought that in a symbolic way our family is together.

I read on the other thread that you were either pg or maybe you just thought you were - what happened since?
do you have any live children?

Morning girls xx

The jewellery sounds lovely, do you have any links ?

I am v v lucky to have my wonderful dd, joy of my life. She's almost 6.

And I'm almost 20 weeks pg.

Well what happened to me was, I got pg with twins, saw them both on a scan about 8 weeks, then at 12 weeks one had died in the womb but was. still there, then my surving twin, ds, died shortly after he was born due to massive heart problems in my arms. When he had his post mortom they found his twin in the placenta, so they were actually buried together in my local churchyard. The headstone etc only says my ds name, but they are both in there together

Then I got pg again,was seen at 8 weeks, little baby moving around etc heart beating,then was about 13, started bleeding, went for scan, and was told again there no heartbeat, and that that baby died at least a week ago. Then went home to wait for the mc to happen, this was fri, sun am my waters went and a tiny tiny baby came out. We buried that one in our garden, so one thing I'm glad about is they have all been buried.

Then I felt unwell for sometime as lost a lot of blood at the mc. Then started ttc after Xmas, when I felt a bit physically better, and now I'm almost 20 weeks. Finding this pg vvvv difficult, havent told dd, it broke her heart when we lost ds, and I just can't bear telling her