Helping children through bereavement

[francesrivis]

Hello, hoping some wise mums can give me some advice. My dds have lost two grandparents this year - my partner's dad died in July and I lost my mum two weeks ago. DP and I are coping, I think, but I am worried about the children. Dd2 (aged 3) not so much - she is a bit unsettled but talks from time to time about missing her grandparents, which seems healthy to me. Dd1 (aged 6), however, does not mention them at all. Her behaviour has been pretty horrendous since my mum died which I am sure is par for the course - I have tried in a fairly inept way to talk to her about how she is feeling (eg. "i'm really sad because I miss nana so much - do you feel like that too?") but she says she is not sad and does not seem to want to open up. I know I can't and shouldn't force her - but how do I help her through this if she won't talk to me?

TIA

Have you thought of making a special memory scrap book with pictures and drawings? It would be a way to discuss memories that she would like put in and you could type them out.

We use Talktostars.org.uk who are a local charity who deal with bereavement in children, you may not be the right area but there is some useful info here

Many thanks, will try these ideas.

Winston's Wish is a charity for supporting bereaved children. They have loads of great resources for different age groups, and their helpline is terrific.