following loss of mum my sister hates my partner

[jackie1234]

We have recently been through a bereavement - our mother (1yr ago) and my teenager (sister) hates my partner, and is rude to him to the point of embarrassment. She resents me spending time with him and I cant even have him in the house because I know it will lead to arguments. My teen wants me to choose between them and this is impossible and I dont think i should have to. My teen has a boyfriend too and sees him whenever she likes. She wants me to be on call for her and have no life of my own. HELP. I am worrying myself sick.

It's the behaviour and not the person that counts. You need to draw a line at where you think behaviour is unreasonable. Rudeness, arguing in front of children, controlling or shouting, whatever it is, decide whether you want to put up with that behaviour regardless of where it comes from. If you can't handle that then your teen is right, choose between them. Bear in mind it may not be forever.