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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Interrupting on the phone

14 replies

flamesparrow · 17/08/2005 09:12

What age are they old enough to understand that you don't interrupt when someone is talking on the phone?

I was always brought up that if Mum was on the phone, then you didn't ask for anything/try to talk to her. I see loads of kids who just interrupt all the time, and you end up being ignored for the highly important "Can I have a biscuit?" to be answered and dealt with.

DD is 2 at the moment, and wants to say hello to anyone on the phone (very handy with salesmen), but when she's done that, she's gone. I know that soon she'll be more capable of asking for stuff, and I want to teach her to wait.

How is best to do it? Will she be too young? Do I just ignore any requests, or try to explain why to her?

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Tommy · 17/08/2005 09:21

Do it as soon as possible!!!
My DSs will be playing perfectly happily together until I phone someone or answer a call, then they just hang around and ask for things and want to talk to to the person "who is it Mummy? Who is it Muumy? Can I talk to them ? Please? I want to talk to them. Who is it? I want to talk to them" blah blah blah.

DS1 is 3 and half BTW - should have druimmed it into hima lot earlier grrrrrr

flashingnose · 17/08/2005 09:24

I was also brought up to think that, but there were also far less phone calls and my Mum never spent hours yakking on the phone so it was a fair rule.

I am having big problems with dd1 doing this atm - she's 4. I explain it to her every time and she nods solemnly and repeats it back to me, but I think she honestly thinks that her request for a drink is much more important than my phone call.

DS is 6 and interrupts much less, so I'm hoping it's something that just improves with age.

Sorry, I've been no help at all! Will be interested to see what people say.

Bozza · 17/08/2005 09:31

I still struggle with this with DS who is 4. If I need to make a phone call its OK because I can explain to him beforehand that I need to talk and not to interupt etc and if its Daddy or Grandma or Auntie X I can let him have a chat too which he enjoys but if its the bank or the council or whatever that he can't talk. But if someone rings us its more difficult and he will be hanging round saying "can I talk, can I talk".

But TBH I was 8 before we got a phone so it was never an issue when I was a child. I can remember going to the phone box on the main road with my Mum and sisters and putting 10p in to ring my Grandma who would then ring us back.

XmariaX · 17/08/2005 10:11

my youngest dd who was 4 in may does it everytime im on the phone and i get, who is it mummy can i say hello who is it mummy and she carries on till i answer her and she did it the other day when i was on a important call to my solicitor. ive tried to explain that she mustn't talk while mummys on the phone but it goes out the window as soon as someone rings

charliecat · 17/08/2005 10:23

My kids drive me mad, they havent spoke to me for 30 mins or so, happily playing but the minute the phone rings they are both round my ankles asking for stuff I now just turn my back on them and if they object I glare at them and go into the garden with the phone. They are 4 and 7.

ThePrisoner · 17/08/2005 23:12

Oh dear, I'm going to be sooooo negative. I'm used to being constantly interrupted by small children if I'm on the phone (am childminder) be it my phone call or if someone rings me, although I'm very good at saying to callers, "I'll call you back later."

Am also mummy to 19 and 21 year olds ... they are not stupid, they do not have hearing problems, they are not on any known medication ... but if the phone rings, and especially if it is REALLY important ... they have got this amazing ability to lose all sense and reason and suddenly need to ask/discuss/disclose a myriad of useless chat. This ability extends to muttering/talking through TV programmes that I want to watch.

wysiwyg · 17/08/2005 23:33

Sounds like my house theprisoner. DH watches TV or surfs in silence, but as soon as I am on the phone to my mum, in he comes, asking some inane question....

MumOnaMission · 18/08/2005 21:42

My dd is 4 and she occasionally interrupts but usually she's fine. I used to ask the person on the phone (no matter who it was) to hang on a minute and then explain to dd that she must be quiet while mummy is on the phone and I will talk to her when I'm finished, say ok, get her agreement, then carry on.

peckarollover · 19/08/2005 19:13

DD drives me MAD with this

I think its one of those things where they can see the weakness when your talking on the phone and just know its the last thing you want them to do so they start whining just to annoy you!

Kayleigh · 19/08/2005 19:16

My two boys are 7 and 4. They can be at the bottom of the garden or on a different floor to me. The minute I pick up the phone they home in on me and start pestering. I don't think they will ever grasp the concept of not interrupting when I'm on the phone. It makes me so

TwoIfBySea · 19/08/2005 20:05

I knew dst who are 3 1/2, had gotten the message when dst1 was playing with his toy phone pretending to talk to his gran and turned to dst2 with great exasperation said "will you shush!"

Took me ages to get it through to them and they still have a carry on when DH is on the phone but not so much with me anymore. I would just reiterated to your dd that when mummy is on the phone she needs to be quiet and then afterward she will get all mummy's attention again.

tortoiseshell · 19/08/2005 20:07

Just drives me demented. Don't know how to deal with it, just end up feeling like going to explode!

brightstar1 · 19/08/2005 21:19

Dont know answer to this either. my 3 drive me mad when on the phone. V.rude.All busy before phone rings! but nothing seems to work.If i hide,which i do quite often.they bang on the door! Wait till their all teenagers, get my own back then.

toothyboy · 19/08/2005 21:59

Ds (2.4) has had to learn to be quiet when we're on the phone as dp works from home so is constantly having to answer it. We just keep repeating "you must be quiet while mummy/daddy is on the phone".

We used to give him a sticker if he could stay quiet for a whole phone call. Fortunately most calls aren't longer than a couple of minutes, 5 at the most, and they come through every 20-30 minutes so he has plenty of opportunities to practise. He pretty much understands now. I always praise him and thank him when he's been quiet while I'm on the phone. But I guess it's probably harder if you don't use the phone as much.

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