Worried about ds and his relationship with his daddy

[bouncingblueberries]

Please tell me there is nothing to worry about here. ds is a gorgeous, affectionate 3.7 year old. He's bright, cheerful and full of energy. But, he refuses to show any affection for his dad if I'm in the house.

He regularly tells me he loves me, kisses me, hugs me, but will only give his daddy a cuddle if I suggest it - and usually reluctantly.

This morning he even said to me "I love you mummy but I don't love daddy". His dad adores him and when they're together, walking to nursery or out having a boys adventure, there's no problem. But it's really starting to get me down. What can I do? It's breaking my heart.

IME, a lot of children go through this phase.

If you were going to go down the Freudian route, it's an Oedipal complex and nothing to worry about....

Thanks Bustle. I just wish it would hurry up and pass it if is a phase!

My 3.4yr old DD does just the same. Cuddles and kisses me, but tells Daddy to go away.

This has been going on about 2-3 months, he's just taking it with a pinch of salt as she went through a similar thing at 10 months and it will pass.

It is a phase. Please encourage your DH not to take it too personally - v. hard I know. He must act as if it's water off a duck's back when DS says "I don't love you" and say jokingly something like - well I love you, so there !! DS is probably pushing for a reaction. 3 year olds do that a lot .

And don't push your son to "prove" his love for his daddy. If they are spending time alone and having a nice time, then that's enough.

In my case, DS1 preferred my DH when we were all together, and I was a SAHM, so you can imagine how gutting that was .....

I became his favourite person again when he went to school, and now he's soppy as anything (age 9).

Thanks. I think I have been pushing him a bit to show affection towards his dad. It just seems like this phase has been going on for forever! He's never preferred his dad to me and it makes it worse that as soon as any granddad's are on the scene, he sticks to them like glue. My poor dh, he really is feeling a tad inadequate!

I have exactly this at the moment,

but DS wont show any affection for ME

Its all about daddy