What is a reasonable amount of time ...

[joburg]

... for DD (6 1/2) to finish her dinner? She drives me insane when sitting a whole hour next to a lousy bowl of soup and i just can't think of anything else than setting a timer. Any other ideas ... please?

Eat with her and eat slowly. Tell her that as she is younger you will wait a little longer for her to finish but after another 5 mins (possibly up to 10mins-your choice)you will remove it. Stick to it and DON'T discuss or argue-just quietly do it. DO NOT give any snacks (other than fruit). Repeat at the next meal. Do not give her any attention over eating, so if she finishes on time still don't comment. Be matter of fact-a meal is for eating, if it isn't eaten it will be removed.

we have transformed mealtimes in our house following advice on THE THREAD. As to timing, anything left on the table after 30 mins is now removed without comment. DD now knows she's got to eat faster if she wants it!!

My DS eats so fast, his has gone before I sit down with mine! My theory is if they want it they'll eat it, if not, don't stress, just remove it.

great, entertaining reading, mrshibbins, thank you! and thank you all for the replies. problem is DD is skinny like a stick, see a thread before about starving herself, and getting sick lately, but i can't stand those endless meal times either. even if she likes the food, she would just play around, stare on the walls, chew endlessely, so i need to do smth about it ... Soon, she will colapse of hunger and me of some psychotic crysis

Make sure that she gets plenty of exercise. A long walk or bike ride before a meal would do wonders!

DD is also hyperactive, probably ADHD, her walk from the bedroom to the kitchen equals a bike ride in the park of somebody elses that's why all the worries also, she spends 5 times the energy of a 'normal' child and still refusing to eat. not that she doesn't get the playground, bike, swimming time but on top of that, each single move she makes involves throwing legs and arms in the air burning enough calories to keep me alive for a week!

you could try getting her help to choose the meal and make it together ... give her a time choice about when you will sit down to actually eat the food ( say 5-6.30 and perhaps before a fav prog) then an agreed length of time that she thinks it might take her to eat it. Put on some music and allow for 4or5 songs to play and when they are finished so is the food ... counting the tracks so when you get to 4th she will know there isnt long left and her prog will be starting ... dont know...might help ... good luck x