Give me strategies to cope with DS aged 2.5 behaviour

[ilikesunshine]

He's 2.5 and just recently has become unbearable. The slightest thing sets him off crying, from me giving him the wrong coloured fork to his brother saying hello to him at the wrong moment. Everything has to be just as he wants it at just the right time he wants it or he goes off into inconsolable tears and tantrums. This is happening a good 20 or so times a day and is driving me mad. His moods are so up and down, and he's so hypersensitive about everything I really feel I'm treading on eggshells all the time. And his poor brother is finding it all a bit much too . Anybody got any experience of this kind of behaviour and how to deal with it?

He sounds like maybe a highly sensitive child? There's a book called that - maybe worth trying to get a copy and see if it fits him. Also sounds like he loves routine and my ds is like this if he gets tired. Try to keep routine consistant so he knows what's coming, give him lots of warnings about plans for the day/afternoon/weekend and keep to them so he isn't surprised. Make sure he's well rested and secure - has there been any big changes that have started this off?

I know it feels like pandering to them, but imo do what you have to to keep things on an even keel. If he needs the same fork for dinner, then let him have it. Try to distract early if you feel like a tantrum's coming on, or talk about it after. My ds never knows why he's thrown a tantrum when he's finished 20 mins of shouting! He's probably able to understand that he needs to be kind if his brother says hello if you can discuss it gently with lots of cuddles.