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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

How do you get a 2 year old to stick up for himself?

4 replies

Bubbaloo2 · 04/11/2009 19:19

I have a 2 1/2 year old who cant stick up for himself in playgroup situations.

He gets pushed out of places due to others asserting territory, or gets things thrown at him.

Am I being over sensitive... will he just learn to defend himself eventually? Its so sad to watch.

OP posts:

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sheeplikessleep · 04/11/2009 19:25

i don't know, but will watch this thread with interest. my just turned 2 year old is very similar - he walks away if another child comes up to him and takes his toy away and backs off in such situations. i'm kind of glad he is that way than over-aggressive, but i do feel like i have to defend my ds too

twolittlekings · 04/11/2009 19:25

Hi Bubbaloo2, he's still very young. However if it is happening a lot with the same child (ren) you could say to them gently that they can wait as your DS is having a go / using the toy. I was never afraid to do that and most reasonable parents will understand. I would then tell DS that he had to let the others have a go etc. I think kids have to learn that they have to wait and share (although like I said 2 is still very young)

My DS is now 4 and we always say to him that it's fine to stick up for himself but not to hit / kick. Again, we have clarified that by also saying that if after he has told whoever is bothering him to leave him alone or not to kick / hit him, a gentle shove out the way is absolutely fine!

I am sure your DS will learn to handle himself just fine and don't worry too much

Littlefish · 04/11/2009 19:53

My dd used to have regular run-ins with the same child at the childminders. This child targetted my dd and would take her toys, block her way, knock down her towers etc. The childminder taught dd to hold her hand up in front of her and say "NO DAVID" in a firm voice (made up name!). It stopped her from screaming and crying, which was the reaction he was looking for. It took a little while, but in time, it started to work.

RatherBeOnThePiste · 04/11/2009 21:20

I would teach him to put his hand up and shout STOP I DON'T LIKE IT, it is a firm and definite action without resorting to phsyical aggression.It can work really well with little children.

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