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play too rough?

4 replies

kathj33 · 04/09/2009 10:21

Hi, does any one else have this problem or hvae any ideas?

I have boy twins 3 and a half and although they adore each other, play together well and share well, they seem to just love playing really roughly with each other 0 wrestling, pulling, pushing - all goo natured and laughing all the way (until as often happens it goes too far and it ends in tears).

I do try to stop it before it escalates, I try time out, I try to explain that I dont want them to get hurt etc etc but it doesnt seem to stop them. I also tried explaining when they get wound up that if it ends it tears then whoever gets hurt doesnt get and sympathy from me as I've already told them to calm it down.
I kind of think (hope) they'll grow out of it and as they aren't doing it in a nasty way it doesnt worry me too much (although I'd like it to stop)
They're pretty well behave in most other ways so shoud I be worried?

Nursery think yes - they really hate iteven though other kids are never involved - its a sibling thing it seems, but we've now been called into a meeting to discuss....help

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Twinsmommy · 04/09/2009 12:22

Oh kathj33 - you could be describing my twin boys - also age 3!!!!!! And now I am nervous because my two START nursery on September 7!!!

I know just what you are going through. The first born seems far more aggressive than the younger, but the younger is sly and will provoke for no good reason.

I've tried time out on the naughty step, but it just escalates into a game between them as, if I try to keep one of them on the step, the other is taunting from the lounge door and I just can't physically be holding one on the step while keeping the other away from the door.

The younger one now purposely lies on the floor waiting for his brother to jump on top of him, stand on him, wrestle with him and yes, inevitably, it all ends in tears and mummy has no sympathy.

They pay no attention to any sort of reasoning and often don't even want to stand still while I say anything to them. Then they tell me mummy is a meany and go off in a strop!

I was kind of hoping nursery might calm them down a bit - but after reading your post, now I'm not so sure.

rupertsabear · 04/09/2009 12:26

I have 3 boys and they wrestle and punch each other all the time. I often get fed up with yelling at them to stop and leave them to it (drawing the line only at hitting with implements).

Ime stopping them watching things like Power Rangers improves things a bit. Lots of time at the playground is also good.

I have 3 friends who either inflicted broken bones on their siblings or were the victims of that serious an injury in childhood. I think it's normal but needs watching.

kathj33 · 04/09/2009 13:38

Yep twinsmommy, we have one twin who is a lot bigger and stronger but its the smaller one who does the provoking ususally and starts these 'fights' then comes crying that he's gotten hurt!

It does at least make you smile when you realise your problems are happening in exactly the same way in other houses.

The naughty step doesnt do too much in our house because the twin who isnt on there always wants to go sit with the other so they're not lonely, sweet as that is....) that is our second naughty step - the first being the bottom step of our stairs where they never minded going - until I worked out that via a big mirror on the wall they could sit there and watch telly

Well out meeting is this afternoon, if they give me a magic wand to stop it I'll let you know!
Somehow I think not....

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Twinsmommy · 05/09/2009 10:11

kathj33 - the description of your twins watching the TV via the mirror really made me giggle! My two are so crafty, I can imagine they are just like yours!

Yes, we have the wanting to sit together on the naughty step. Would love to hear how your appointment goes and what they say. If you ever want to gauge their behaviour against another household, please feel free to message me! As you say, I feel a little relief knowing that same is going on somewhere else!!!

All the best!

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