"Hyperactive" and grumpy baby - will it get better??

[KiwiPanda]

Feeling a bit at the end of my tether at the moment. DD is 8 1/2 months and will NOT keep still for 5 seconds. She refuses to sit (on my lap, on the floor, anywhere) just immediately goes into crawling which is fine at home but a nightmare when out and about. People don't seem to believe me until they try to hold her and realise it's like holding an eel. People on the train give me "good god can't you hold your own baby?" looks when she's having a meltdown (because she's been forced to be still for 2 seconds) - if she's cross she'll fight me if I hold her, try to dive out of my arms etc. She also refuses to be in the pushchair unless it's moving - if I stop even briefly e.g in the supermarket she goes mental.

Whatever she does she'll be frustrated/angry/upset after about 2 minutes. She seems to have a particularly low boredom threshold, if you can say that about a small baby. The only thing that reliably keeps her happy is standing up / "walking" her around.

So.. this is clearly just the way it is.. but is there any hope that it'll get better?? she just seems "grumpy" SO much of the time

Sounds like you'll have a mare of a time until she can walk .... then it's hold on to your hat !!

She's probably just frustrated that she can't walk yet. Once she gets going she'll probably be happy. And possibly manic. But in a happy way.

Sounds like shes a bright little button! My DD was the same. Best to resign yourself to the fact that you don't have a placid baby and probably never will. DD is now a clever, funny, active and beautiful 9yo, but she was very very hard work until she was nearly 4 (ok..take deep breaths)..which is why there is a 7 year age gap between her and her brother! Once she got old enough to be able to spread her wings and stretch her brain just a little bit more, she calmed down and cheered up! Still keeps us on our toes though..and my DS is just the same. (which is why my husband is having a vasectomy next year!)
By the way...the wriggling, refusing to sit in buggy, v low boredom threshold..all normal for this sort of child...just keep telling yourself how she's obviously a budding genius and frustrated at her limits etc etc (and drink plenty of wine!)

I sympathise. My ds was exactly as you describe. I remember one visit to the in laws for an afternoon, and my bum hit the seat for literally 5 seconds that entire afternoon....DS just needed constant movement and was constantly on to the next thing. It is exhausting and draining.

I'd get together with other mums at their houses, and see almost nothing of them, while DS was on the move through the house, investigating everything....I was so envious of them sitting round their kids on the rug, actually able to chat and drink coffee!

May I respectfully suggest reins, for when she does walk - because if she's like DS she will go straight for the RUNNING option!!!

It does get better, I agree, when they can walk and be more independent. If I'm honest, DS was very hectic till he was about 2. Hope that doesn't seem too long away but of course your dd is not my ds and they are all different. She may take longer

I can sympathise too. My DS (now 20 months) was EXACTLY like that. For the first year of his life it seemed that he did nothing but cry and fight me. He was an extremely high-needs baby and I just had to survive every day. He didn't crawl either so that just made the frustration worse. He just wanted to be picked up all the time and only me walking around with him would help. Very very hard going.

However, light at the end of the tunnel.........he started walking 2 weeks before his 1st birthday and started talking around that time too. His behaviour changed quite dramatically. I thought he would always be grumpy and challenging but he's a very happy, very clever and now fairly independent little toddler. I put the behaviour down to frustration. Also, for the 1st year he hated his buggy, car seat etc but now that he can tire himself out, he's quite glad to have a little ride and enforced break from all the running around. Don't get me wrong, he hasn't suddenly become placid, he never will be as he is very strong-willed but it has been clear that he was as bright as a button and needs a lot of stimulation. His vocabulary is amazing, everyone comments on his speech. He doesn't have full-blown tantrums as you can generally explain things to him to prevent them.

So, hang on in there. I know exactly how you feel and it does feel as though it last forever but it really won't. And, although you may not see them, there are lots of other babies squirming around on their mums knees dying to get on the floor and move around. You never see these babies when you're at the end of your tether with your own, but MN is testament that they do exist. Keep doing what you're doing, it will get easier!!

Thanks all, feel cheered by your support/ comments. I think she does desperately want to be able to walk so hopefully she will do it soon - my niece has JUST started walking at 20 months, imagine if my little one were to remain frustrated for that long . I'm sure it's personality though - DD is going to walk as soon as she's physically capable of doing it, while my niece was one of those "I'm quite happy sitting here thanks, not interested in rolling, crawling or walking for a long time" babies.

When she does walk I can see we will definitely need reins, she'll be charging off at any given opportunity into all sorts of dangerous situations...

DD was exactly like this, very low boredom threshold. And when she couldnt crawl she was a nightmare, just wanted to be carted around, and used me like some sort of climbing frame. Now that she can explore situations herself, and let me now what she needs, she is a lot calmer. Still hard work though, using a combination of shuffling and cruising everywhere since she was 10 months, and i dont think shes far off walking - shes 13 months. Today at soft play, i met up with some friends, those babies were happy to stay in one place, dd was everywhere climbing, going up to people begging for food, trying to get in their bags, attempting to get in the checkout section. Needless to say i didnt see much of my friends. Ive accepted dd as she is now, although the first year was the hardest work ive ever done. Silver lining though, once they start moving fast, the baby weight falls off 1 stone since shes been 10 months with now signs of slowing - no diet nothing, just continuously on the go - yippee!

I had this 100% with my first. Even before she could walk, she's scream to get out of the buggy. I used to wonder if she wanted to CRAWL home! Car journeys were a nightmare and I think I came close to a heart attack on a few short flights.

Funnily enough, once she could walk, she was not a "bolter" and was quite content to stay beside me. Everything on her terms

Suffering from PWT -- pre walking tension, as I called it for my 4th DC... Mrswill, I was the one who lost a stone after my DC started walking . 'Twas fab.

My ds was EXACTLY the same. Even as a tiny new born baby he wouldn't let me sit still with him, he wanted me to walk with him on my chest the entire time he was awake. He would never be cuddled or sit in a pushchair/ carseat without screaming and writhing about! He too got very bored and seemed constantly to be either frowning or crying his eyes out. He was so so difficult and it felt like there must be something developmentally wrong with him to make him so different. We tried visits to cranial osteopathy, trips to see health visitors, doctors etc. No one could ever really give us any advice. He was just bloomin miserable and frustrated from about 5 days old! He wouldn't sit in a highchair so weaning was a complete nightmare, we just gave up on going anywhere in the car because he hated being stuck in his car seat and God help us if we had to stop at traffic lights!

Once he learned to crawl he was slightly happier, but only when he was actually crawling, still wouldn't sit still or be held unless I stood up and showed him things and walked around with him. He got much better and happier once he could walk and talk. Seemed much less frustrated and I could explain to him why we needed to sit still for 2 seconds every so often.

He's 2 now and i still very 'busy', always doing something but is fantastic at entertaining himself as he finds EVERYTHING so interesting! He is just very curious about everything and wants to touch, feel, experience everything first hand. He's very cever though (I'm sure everyone thinks that about their kids) but he really is very coordinated and because he never stops doing things and taking things in, he never stops learning. He is so much fun but will now sit still and watch an entire episode of Mickey Mouse on the sofa. It does get better but it was HARD work for the first 12-18 months. xxx

my 15 month grandson is such hard work, he rarely sleeps through the night has to be constantly kicking around in bed unable it seems to have a peaceful sleep, his legs have to be moving.
He seems now to fight sleep during the day and is very irritable and grumpy.
When i have him i take him for walks talk to him , play, read he is unable to sit still for more than few minutes at a time. He crawls and stands but isnt walking yet. he seems so tired but wont sleep.
Any thoughts on this anyone?