help with ds pooing his pants PLEASE!!

[AwayWithTheFaries]

he was 4 in april been potty trained for well over a year but he still wont tell us when he needs a poo!
he used to do a little dance and you could tell when he needed to go and then i could sit him on the toilet
3 times today hes pooed his pants iv just had to shower him because hes pooed his pjs
im trying not to make a big deal out of it and told him that his friends mummy and daddy dont poo their pants the go on the toilet im 3 days over due with ds2 and getting at the end of my rag!!
but the really annoying thing is he dosnt seen in the least bit bothered!!!

I can't tell you what you should do, or how you should handle this situation, but I had this problem when I was a little girl. My parents always shouted at me when I did it, told me I was dirty, or i was a baby etc. I have absolutely no idea why i did it, but i wasn't being naughty, or attention seeking, i just did it. I will never forgive my parents for making me feel so small and dirty. I still have a problem with self esteem. Please don't do this to your baby, he's only 4 and prob doesn't know what's going on either. He only pretends he doesn't care. Maybe he's scared about what's gonna happen when ds2 comes? Just tell him that even if he poos his pants 6 times a day, you'll still love him, clean him, shower him and dress him because that's what good mums do. You must be exhausted, I remember my second pregnancy. Get some help, from family or friends to help you.

he could well be chronically constipated, which weirdly manifests itself with poo in pants

if kids get chronically constipated their colon loses its elasticity so they're not getting the right signals that they need to do a poo

I'd take him to hte GP and explain what's been going on and ask for a referral to a paediatric incontinence clinic

you have all my sympathy - I was pg with dd during ds2's worst phase of constipation and it was utterly hideous - he's fine now, but it took a long time and a lot of medication to sort it - good luck

ps getting cross with him will only make it worse

Agree with mimsum.

Search pooing, soiling and encorpesis on here. Lots of threads with good suggestions.

The main thing to start off with, if it is due to constipation, is that it is not in his control and not something he can help.

thanks i dont tell him off or shout at him hes not consipated poos are normal maybe even a little loose due to the amount of fruit he eats! and the potty is always around too and if he does poo on the potty or toilet he gets loads of praise im just worried as he starts school next week!
kitty your post brought a tear to my eye wish i did have more help all my family are miles away and sil and bil have babies too! and i dont think its to do with the new baby hes really excited