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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Any tips for seeing a paed?

26 replies

goingincognito · 03/08/2009 11:23

Going soon about ds (6) and his behaviour - I don't want to waffle on and waste the time we have. Prev appointments have been with a different one for health issues, so no real experience. I made an idiot of myself asking GP for referral and don't want to repeat that!
Thanks in advance - have disguised regular self for this.
Am thinking ASD type probs, lots of probs at school re behaviour in YRR and start of Y1 but now much more settled as far as school concerned.

OP posts:

LIZS · 03/08/2009 11:27

Do a checklist of examples of behaviour which concerns you.

SlartyBartFast · 03/08/2009 11:30

do you have to take your red book?

can you remember his early development?

but i expect they have a format of questions to go through.
do you have any school reports, they would be very useful.

MollieO · 03/08/2009 11:32

I would do a list of what concerns you and examples of that behaviour (eg particular events/situations). The more specific you can be the better.

Original poster

goingincognito · 03/08/2009 11:33

Yes, have early development, mainly because he was SCBU and had speech therapy etc. School reports v good idea - will dig those out (luckily only will have to find 2!)
Checklist good - also will ask dh to add to it. Thanks!

OP posts:

Original poster

goingincognito · 03/08/2009 11:33

Thanks MollieO xpost

OP posts:

SlartyBartFast · 03/08/2009 11:37

oh and reprots from nursery - if you have any. they should be relevant, salt reports, the more the merrier,

bubblagirl · 03/08/2009 11:39

any background history on both sides yours and dh any ASD depression or any other mental illnesses any speech related problems

any information on ds progress from small to now reports diary sleep problems routines etc anything that concerns you no matter how small or insignificant it may seem all helps

any triggers to behaviour loud noises, crowds etc any other sensory problems just a complete run down of any incidents problems from small to now

it all helps i went in with diary , reports, behavioural concerns eye contact i noticed my ds was good at eye contact when speaking to me but not when asked a question he averted his eyes away and wouldnt hold eye contact back

good luck

Original poster

goingincognito · 03/08/2009 11:49

Thank you - I noticed eye contact in reception was wrong, and then there was a cough that started when a friend of dd's came round and went on at him (it got (mis?) diagnosed as mild asthma). He makes odd noises at times, we have SALT stuff somewhere - shd I just bring as much as poss? There is a school picture of special people, where he hasn't put family, just objects or superheroes.
I just feel like there is so much that is nothing alone, but all adedd up it's something and I'm worried I'll come away with a pat on the head and a diagnosis of overly concerned if I don't think about it beforehand. Thanks.

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 03/08/2009 11:53

to be honest they will probably see enough with what you have to know your not overly analysing take anything and everything that could be of help the fact special people was objects is good , the cough the nervous tick etc just everything you have that has some mention of concern use it, ds showed enough in his actions in our meeting to warrant a dx and i didnt even think he was at the time lol but i guess i didnt want to see or had no other child to compare him too at the time

good luck dont panic there professionals they can see past things and know what stands out for them thats why i said even if seems insignificant to them could be an important factor

Original poster

goingincognito · 03/08/2009 11:56

Thank you. I just really want to help him be happy, and not get told off all the time. It's always him with other children in trouble, but not in an impulsive way more they come down and say x hurt me. Then it turns out he's put up with lots and then got cross/ frustrated.

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 03/08/2009 12:02

oh bless him im surprised the school are not helping more to be honest as if concerns they can do an action plus thing no dx needed just extra help from them to tackle the problem areas

i hope you get what you need out of the meeting i know a dx can seem so terrible when given in the long run its been fab for us i understand my ds better i deal with him better as i know the triggers to things

also any sleep issues falling a sleep etc? you could ask about melatonin only paed can prescribe this i find my ds is much better on this and is more functionable around others

bubblagirl · 03/08/2009 12:04

i also use eye q strawberry chews cheaper on ebay then in shop they are expensive in shop you can get double for same money on ebay i noticed big difference in ds when i put him on these

Original poster

goingincognito · 03/08/2009 12:07

That's true. he's either really tired and asleep or up and down all night with things he's worried about. Can't save them til morning. He's on SA for literacy and I think as a response to having had SALT externally when he started. He has a group lesson I arranged to give him an hour a week to help, but last week she said he'd refused to do any writing. Initially they thought dyslexia/ Irlens maybe, but who knows? My mum thinks he's 'not right' (she adores him) and I think school don't worry if they are quietly in the corner not causing a fuss iyswim? Sorry - wittering on! Thanks for your help, I think you are right about dx and I am glad it's helped yr ds.

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 03/08/2009 12:12

my ds is the same he has HFA and is content most of the time and just observes that why i needed to fight harder before he started school as any naughty child would outshine my ds needs for attention he would be easily forgotten

you can witter on as much as you like maybe pop over to sn board for some extra support while going through this were a good bunch lol

i would mention the sleep and that you know, someone who has melatonin and has helped hugely my ds will sit and talk math all night or needs mental stimulation on his ds for hundreds of hours his scape from dealing with things and his 4 lol

but having good few hours sleep has improved him hugely so would be worth mentioning

maybe we'll see you on sn board lots of others going through exact same as you at the moment so could be useful to you but most of all supportive

Original poster

goingincognito · 03/08/2009 12:17

Yes - that's great. I will do. Apptment Thurs, I am just really aware that he may get 'missed' as he is coping in mainstream and had (actually, can only think of to) friends. I will come over now I know where you are! (DS always on PSP for hours...)

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 05/08/2009 14:57

good luck for tomorrow

Original poster

goingincognito · 05/08/2009 20:09

Thankyou! On my second glass of wine, just photocopied all the COPS tests, and primed dh not to say, he's fine, he's just a boy repeatedly

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bubblagirl · 05/08/2009 20:23

lol yes just get him to sit sweetly and say nothing lol enjoy the wine well needed i would imagine all will be fine they know what they are looking for good luck let me know how you get on

Original poster

goingincognito · 05/08/2009 20:25

Will do - thanks for your help, am sort of looking forward to it, iyswim. Will post 2mrw unless dire results!

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 06/08/2009 10:36

thinking of you hope all goes well

Original poster

goingincognito · 06/08/2009 20:35

Thanks. They are going to assess at school, so feel q positive. Will come and find you all on SEN boards in Sept, when we get some answers. Really grateful for your support.

OP posts:

SlartyBartFast · 06/08/2009 23:10

glad you feel positive

bubblagirl · 07/08/2009 07:53

if you need support before then just come on and have a chat with us your more than welcome even without dx others are in same situation as you at moment could be useful to support each other until then

glad they are going to assess when at school, no doubt i'll do a support thread for the school starters again lol hope to speak to you soon good luck

Original poster

goingincognito · 10/08/2009 09:02

Hello again. New appointment came through for a few months, so should I see the school and say that they are going to ask for info in the meantime? Wd it be polite?

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 10/08/2009 09:57

you could speak to the school anyway and just inform them of what's going on and can they offer any extra help in meantime etc whatever the problem within school is highlight it and see if they can offer any extra help for it

maybe do a buddy system is there any child he particularly likes they could team him up with

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