DD 12 - everyone's using facebook but ME...

[wangle99]

that is what DD came home saying from school, I presumed it was the usual 'everyone' is doing something when in fact they aren't and I checked on facebook and she's right the majority of her friends are on there.

I maintain that its not suitable for a 12 year old - what are your opinions? DH says he doesn't want her on there but I think he'd have her locked away not in contact with boys if he had his way lol

I had the same misgivings (my DD is now 13) but relented just last week for her to keep in touch with friends over the summer. My DH set it up so that her page can't be seen by anyone she doesn't invite (there's a way you can keep it hidden apparently) and we've had a long (and very boring I'm sure) talk about how easy it is to share inappropriate information etc. The school has gone through loads of "cyber" issues with the children so she knew more than us to be honest! If facebook is the way her friends are comunicating then she will definately be out of the loop (and possibly miss out on last minute invites to cinema etc) - and when you're that age, that kind of thing is also very important.

I've not got a 12 year old but my 11 year old cousin is on there. The other day a test she had taken came up on my news feed entitled 'where is the weirdest place you will ever have sex?' (her answer was something like a furry orgy, or something equally as odd and, IMO, inappropriate). I also get regular notifications that people I am 'friends' with have become fans of bondage, sex in the morning etc. Oh, and there's an awful lot of rather unsavory rasict groups.

In short- no, I don't think it's suitiable for a 12 year old. But then I might just be a bit of a prude.

My son is nearly 12- he opened an account, and I shut it.

He did so again, one of my friends reported him, and it was shut.

With me, i was concerned because he had lots of older teens as friends,-lads he knows in our village- and also some of my family, young 20 odd year old lads who have very...er....inappropriate vids of themselves for an 11 year old to watch.

I agree, a lot of his friends use it

I think it's really difficult- if you are a friend too you can see what he's up to pretty much- I was a 'friend', but just felt he was being exposed to too much.
You could demand their password?

I don't know- tricky one... but they ARE meant to be at least 14 I think, she will have lied about her age.

And I just use it to keep in touch with other members of a walking group! How naive we are - I had no idea what else went on there! Maybe need to reconsider my daughter's use of facebook now - or at least cross examine her on any quizzes she may have recently completed!

There is actually an age limit of 13 on Facebook

www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2008/aug/07/socialnetworking.facebook

let her when she's 13 then. in reality,not alot goes on on facebook really.

what is it you imagine is going to happen?

My problem is with the applications ie 'what sex position are you' etc etc many sex related that will be visible. Have spoken to DH and have decided that she can join, but can have no adults on her facebook profile (therefore unlikely to see dodgy applications or dodgy tag lines) however have set up with one of my email addresses so whenever anyone does ANYTHING I get notified lol

Knowing what to do is really hard, I personally would have left her not on it but being the only one (all but one other) not on there seemed a shame especially as now on the summer hols.

My 14 year old then 13 was on facebook and ended up on a dating agency apparently age 19!!! She is no longer on it, Do not allow your children to open links on facebook or msm or similar my daughter has crashed her second laptop,they are nothing but trouble,and my dd is a good kid but naive.