DS1 (2.11) recently become aware of the distinction between girls and boys - but seems to be taking it to the extreme. Is this normal?

[Ceebee74]

In that he is obsessed that only boys can like blue and only girls can like pink, only boys can like Thomas/Diego etc and only girls can like Fifi/Dora.

When we play with his train set, I am not allowed to touch the 'boy' engines and he will pile them all up next to him and give me the 3 'female' trains he has. He gets very stressed if I put a blue top on and he found an old pink top of his in his drawer this morning and was horrified when I told him it was his

There are loads more examples - is it normal to be so obsessive about the difference between girls and boys at this age?

I wouldn't worry my ds2 was like this for a while but grew out of it - especially when he realised he wasn't allowed any strawberry ice cream cos it was pink and therefore only for girls. I just didn't make much of an issue of it and he soon forgot about making such a big deal of it as well - although he still has very definite distinctions. Don't worry

Shouldn't worry unless there's some influence making him think like that. For example is he at nursery - do they make a big deal out of boy/ girl? My nephew wouldn't go near Playmobil as he thought they were dolls..! I was shocked to find his nursery were perpetuating it and talked actively about boys do x, girls do y. Mind you, he's 14 now so it was a while ago.

Smee he does go to nursery 4 days a week but I have no idea if they are influencing him. Afaik, they always have a variety of toys out and the children can choose what they want to play with (we actually have a photo of him trying on a dress and admiring himself in the mirror ) but that was about 12 months ago now but I hope it shows his nursery let them do what they want iyswim.

Ah well, like all things, 'it will pass' - I just want to be able to play with the exciting trains like Harvey and Harold the Helicopter again Rosie and Emily are so boring and I don't even get any trucks because apparently they are all boys aswell

I think he's just reached a very normal stage in his life, namely being male! He may also go through a phase of Daddy hero worship, or of any other significant male role models. There could be an element of copying what he's observed at nursery, but I imagine it will settle down.

You could point out that there are female train drivers these days! Then you might get a turn with the boy engines.