Selective hearing and competitive crying in 2 1/2 yr old

[RinkyDinkyPinky]

DD1 is driving me mad...
The selective hearing goes along the lines of ignoring anything that she doesn't immediately want to do. I ask nicely, then ask again with a little reason/ encouragement, then insist it's important to do with reason (eg "we can't go to friend's house without your shoes on...") then end up using the stern voice or shouting at her. She's 2 1/2.

The crying thing is, I think, an attention seeking device. DD2 has been teething really badly (big front teeth) this last week and DD1, in response, is constantly demanding hugs/ climb on mummy/ read a book usually at really difficult moments when I'm trying to tend to DD2.

I feel exhausted...

Anyone else dealing with this kind of thing?

Yes. Constantly. It;'s so frustrating. The thing that sorted me out (note, i say me not her!) is some time off as a family for a few days. Made the world of difference.

Thanks biscuitstuffer, today was somewhat better and tomorrow is Saturday. Thinking of doing some kind of yoga/ meditation just to regain a bit of personal head-space...