HELP/ADVICE Teaching 4yr old DD 2 READ & Phonics Struggling

[ValleyRed]

My DD is 4yrs old and started at her reception full time this term (Jan) and was mornings up until December.
DD is struggling to take in the 'Jolly Phonics' sounds and also reading as a result. She is behind her peers and the school are becoming concerned which in turn has made me panic and worry.
Every day she comes home with a book to read herself and a book to share reading, which we spend approx 2x15 minutes each evening to go through book books but doesn't seem interested alot of the time and cries. I have asked her why she cries but just clams up, I'm worried that she is being treated differently to her peers while in school and this in turn is effecting her learning.
I will admit it is sometimes difficult to get some quite reading time together due to DS who's 2.5yrs and into everything non stop!
Can anyone suggest anything I could try to help her relax and enjoy her beautiful books and catch up with her peers?

maybe buy a jolly phonics frieze and put it on the wall,play a game with her to take turns to say a sound each night.
with her own reading book,read it to her first,then read alternate lines you,then her etc .also just do a page a night or so.If she can't read a word,read it for her,if she gets word wrong but it sort of makes sense,just carry on.