Anyone else having this conversation with your 2-year-old over and over and over again? Tell me I'm not alone.

[EmpressTequilaLaMingMingGnarr]

Her: Mummy, whatchoo doing?
Me: Wiping the table.
Her: Whatchoo doing Mummy?
Me: I'm wiping the table.
Her: Whatchoo doing?
Me: I'm wiping the table.
Her: Mummy?
Me: Yes?
Her: Whatchoo doing?
Me: I'm wiping the table.
Her: Whatchoo doing Mummy?
Me: Wiping the table.

Repeat X infinity or until you melt through sheer lack of will to live.

X 100000 times a day.

What a great thread! DD is 3.3 and we have been through the 'what's that?' phase, the 'what are you doing?' phase and are now on to 'why'.

We also went through a phase where DD would constantly ask us to repeat ourselves: 'What did you say?', to the point where we started to worry about her hearing. Turned out to be just another way of asking incessant questions to annoy her parents.

One of the funniest conversations I recall having in recent months was in the car:

DD: What are you doing mummy?
Me: I'm driving DD. What are you doing?
DD: I'm thinking about squirrels

Priceless

Oh yes I agree with whoever said it doesn't get any easier as they get older.

Just today we had from ds (5):
"Mummy what would happen if there was no God?"
me:

dd3 is nearly three. Every week or so she turns into something and will not be named,or answer to her name unless it is her new name.
At the moment she is goldilocks, but recently has been a robot, scarecrow ladybird and then butterfly. well at least she's moving up the evolutionary scale!

I can't say "well done dd3 you have been a helpful girl"
I have to say "well done goldilocks"

KT, yes!

Yesterday I got from DD1 (5)

"So what does Jesus do now then?"
"Well, some people believe that he grew up but has now died"
"How/why/when did he die? What did he die of?"

"Er..."

"Do you think he died, Mummy?"

Oh I LOVE the "what doing mummy?" questions, I will be so sad when that ends. Hilarious

Hahahahaha! This has made me really properly laugh. I am so glad I'm on my own in the office.

"It's like being trapped in a Beckett play."

That is exactly what it's like. Except it's a Beckett play that lasts for years...

What I love about roleplay is the way it starts and finishes arbitrarily:

DD. You're the baby and I'm the mummy. Now you say 'wah!'
Me. Wah! Wah!
DD. There there baby, don't cry. Would you like some milk baby?
Me. Glug glug glug
DD. Have you had enough milk now baby? There there. Baby, please can I have some pink juice in a cup without a lid? Now go back to bed baby....

etc

PMSL.

At the familiarity of it all.

I am currently contradicted a lot, in a rather condescending manner.

"Mummy sing "Wish you a Merry Christmas"
(I do)
"No Mummy, not like that, do it fast"
(I oblige)
"Mummy sing it properly!"
(I am!)
"Mummy what does kin mean"
(I explain)
"No mummy, kin doesn't mean family, it means like you put a hat on!"
(I am stumped, until I realise she's is thinking of kings, and try to explain the difference)
"No mummy, kings don't wear a G, they wear a hat!" (weary sigh from 2 year old) "Silly Mummy."

Thank you for allowing me to break the monotony and snigger at my screen..

When I get the why question I respond with the same why?.. why?.. why?.. until ds eventually grins sheepishly and shuts up..

The What's that? Questions I turn around and go 'I don't know, What is it?' He generally knows the answer..

Bless his cotten socks before I wrap em round his neck

I try 'Well, what do you think it is?' sometimes but she's got wise to it so I get the reply 'No mummy, you have to tell me. You're the mummy and I'm the baby' followed by a world-weary sigh.

My 4yo is currently into rhetorical questions:

Mummy?
Yes.
D'you know what?
No.
Well, you know Daddy?
Yes.
Do you know what he said?
No.
Well, you know in our house?
Yeeessssss
And on. And on. And on.

It feels like having your brain sucked out through a straw. [aaaargh emoticon]

Today with DD (19 m) outside public toilets:-

DD - Mum, dat poo.
Me - ok I'll change your nappy
DD - (shakes head) Mum, dat POO (points)
Me - You've not done a poo, what poo, where?
DD - (shakes head furiously) Mum, DAT POO DERE (points again)
Me - eh? What poo?
DD - Muuuum, DAT POOOOOOOOOO ( points at man coming out of toilet)
Me - its rude to point, darling (goes red and apologises to "DAT MAN")
DD - (follows man) DAT POO DERE

She also waits outside the toilet when DH is in there and shouts "Dad poo".

Obviously have potential Gillian Mckeith on our hands (please god no)

This thread is SOO true. Ours is (DH 23 months):

Me: Did you have a nice day at nursery?
DS: Yes
Me: What did you do?
DS: Yes
Me: Did you do painting?
DS: Yes
Me: What did you paint?
DS: Yes
Me: What did you have for dinner?
DS: Yes

He has a great vocab but these conversations drive me INSANE!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ooooh sooo true!!

Don't forget:
"What doing mummy?"
"I'm on the toilet?"
"What doing mummy?"
"having a wee wee"
"What doing mummy?"
"still having a wee wee"
"Let's seeeee!"

Or his favourite:
"where's mummy gone?"
"I'm here"
"where daddy gone?"
"work"
"where's

according to dh living with our dd is like living with Jack woolley off the Archers....(with apologies to all non-Archers listeners )

4am convo went like this

dd "Wahhhh!"
me "you ok sweetie?"
dd "stinky poo"
me "shall I change your nappy?
dd "yes pleeth mummy"
me (quietly) "God this reeks"
dd "its disgusting mummy...clean it up quick!"

clean up begins..
dd "dont miss that bit...this way mummy"
me "ok ok"
dd "nunnight mummy"
me "nunnight dd"
dd "mummy?"
me "yes dd?"
dd "you're sooo funny ha ha ha ha"
me "go to sleep dd"
dd "whats that noise?"said strange Dorset accent)
me "night dd"
dd "ha ha ha ha"

I let ds walk around the supermarket the other day. It took aaaaaagggeeeessss, mostly becuase:

ds: wassat in there mummy?
me: an oraange
ds: wassat up there mummy?
me: another orange
ds: wassat in there mummy?
me: an orange
ds: wassat in there mummy?
me: what do you think it is?
ds: an orange
me: that's right, now can we get moving?
ds: wassat in there mummy?
me: another orange now come on
ds: wassat in there mummy?

took about 20 mins to get out of the fruit and veg aisle. Now I remember why I never walk him round supermarkets

It can vary slightly in swapping between
wassat in there
to seeit / touch it / eat it
or even mummy see it (yes, I CAN!)

and we get the poo conversations

me: have you done a poo?
ds: no
(hmm, I shouldnt ask rhetorical questions should I?)
me: I can smell a poo, can I check your bum please?
ds: no poo in there
me: yes there is, lets change your bum
ds: no poo in there mummy
me: ok, I will just get your things...
ds: no poo in there mummy
me: ok oohhh, smelly poo
ds: no poo. seeit! touchit!
me: errr, no
ds: see poo! touch poo!
me:

"Eek, there's an earring on the floor, did you pick that up from the desk whilst you were sitting on my lap when I was mning doing important admin on the computer?"
"Yes"

"Did you pick them both up from the desk?"
"Yes"
"Please can you help Mummy find the earring, it's very important"
"It's not very important, Mummy, it's not important at all"
"It is, darling, [DD2] might put it in her mouth and its very dangerous"
"It's not very dangerous, Mummy, it's not dangerous at all"
"What did you do with the earring?"
"I hung it up in the kitchen"

"Did it fall off?"
"No, I took it off"
"Where did you put it?"
"Somewhere else?"
"Where?"
"Somewhere else."
"Whereabouts, though?"
"Somewhere else, Mummy. It's not very dangerous."
"Can you show me where somewhere else is?"
"Somewhere else"

These are hysterical. We were saying goodbye to a friend yesterday who said 'Bye, hope Father Christmas comes', DD1 responded blithely "Yes, he will, but he can just put the bike on the floor and go".

What is it with poo denial? DS goes in an instant from 'Doing a poo' to 'No poo. No poo.'

Lately he has started getting very sociable towards his poo - 'Hello poo!' when we get the nappy off, then 'Bye bye poo!' (waving madly)....

ds1: mummy, that was a nice party wasn't it
mummy: yes it was fun and santa's house was very twinkly
ds1: i liked the sausages
mummy: you ate 2, they must have been tasty
ds1: shall we play christmas music when we get home?
mummy: ooh that's a good idea, the jingly type or the dancy type?
ds1: jingly please mummy
mummy: OK

3 nanoseconds silence as we troll along in what mummy thinks is companionable silence

ds1: mummy! talk to me! Listen to ME! MUMMY MUMMY TALK TO ME
mummy: we are talking love. what's next?
ds1: No TALK to ME! LISTEN! MUMMY!!! TALK TO ME
mummy: you like your dinosaur bag present. do you think the other children liked their presents?
ds1: >breaks into tears< no mummy TALK TO ME!

anyone enlighten me on wtf that's about. beyond party comedown? he's 3 and a half...

Our favourite:

DD (urgently): SHH! What's that sound?
Me: What sound?
DD: Monster's coming!
Me: What kind of monster?
DD: Pink one.
Me: What's its name?
DD: Roger.
Me: OK. Let's tell the monster to go away. GO AWAY MONSTER!
DD: Monster gone now.
(pause)
DD: SHH! What's that sound?

etc etc etc. God knows where she got 'Roger' from.

I love this thread!!

My DS (3.5) is obsessed with outside christmas lights - every time we go out in daylight
"They have taken their lights down"
"No, they are just turned off"
"Why, are they broken?"
"No, but you can't see them unless it's dark"

Then when you go out in the dark

"They have put their lights back up"
"Oh yes, aren't they pretty"
"You said they were broken"

Now I just agree with everything he says!

DD in back of car as we go past every new set for christmas lights..."OOH! I LOVE christmas!.............OOH! I LOVE christmas...hmmm.hmm....hmmm.........OOH I LOVE christmas!"