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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

20 month old. Will he always be such hard work!!!!!!!!

13 replies

Sallyallyally · 27/10/2008 12:27

I have an 8 year gap between my DS and DD so maybe my memory is failing me! Have just come bak from a 'lovely' walk in the park where DS had the biggest screaming and crying fit because I wouldn't let him grab all the drinks from the cafe fridge. We were about 1/2 a milefrom the car and clever old me forgot the buggy so I had to carry this enormous lump of screaming kicking toddler with mucus and saliva leaking out of every exposed orifice (his, not mine!). At one point I put him down and he lay there in the mud for 10 minutes doing the same whilst people walked carefully round me in a kind of 'don't make any fast moves near the mad lady' way. I kept my temper, I didn't shout or do any of the things the stupid patronising blinking baby books tell you not to and all in all it was horrible and I wanted to cry!!!!!!!!!!
He seems like a bright spark, understands lots, physically very able, problem solves but doesn't speak much that anyone can understand yet. However we have at least 4 or 5 of these tantrums every day if not more if he can't get his own way. Love him to bits, but please could someone reassure me he won't always be monster child!!!

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Roca · 27/10/2008 12:49

With a 4 and 2 yr old who have many 'moments' throughout the day I can't totally reassure you but totally empathise with you. My DD is textbook when it comes to tantrums and it can turn a lovely day into a total nightmare. Just wanted to let you know you are not alone.

Original poster

Sallyallyally · 27/10/2008 14:27

Thanks Roca x

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 27/10/2008 14:40

oh goodness so normal had 40 minute tantrum well not me my ds lol kicking screaming refusing to walk trying to crawl the 15 min walk home had to carry him kicking and screaming he says want to walk so iput him down he says no and back on floor again

horrible days when this happens i just want to cry its hard work

so you have my sympathies big hugs to you x

Original poster

Sallyallyally · 27/10/2008 14:42

That's great, I couldn't face haing Supernanny round...too much effort to tidy my house before the film crew arrived

OP posts:

sorkycake · 27/10/2008 14:42

No he'll be okay by the time he gets to about 3.

mamaspanx · 27/10/2008 14:44

have a 20 mth old who is going through this at the mo too. he is getting his incisors so is bad tempered anyway. don't remember anything like this with ds 1 who is 4.5.

he refuses to go in pushchair, refuses to walk and hes really big and i refuse to carry him (20wks pregnant), he will shout and scream and be miserable like a thing possessed and i find it rather bewildering. he is bolder and more forthright than his big brother was but oh god i'm dreading when the baby arrives because he is going to be majorly cheesed off

TracyK · 27/10/2008 14:44

Was he tired or hungry? my ds was fine - unless - he was tired or hungry and then nothing would pacify him. It went on till he was about 2.8 and then it reduced each month till he was about 3 and it's been fine since.

But I was fed up doing 'outings' as they always ended in tears (his and mine). dh would regularly take us to Ikea around 12 o'clock - and wonder why I got in a strop - until 1pm hit and so did the tantrums!!

Smee · 27/10/2008 14:56

DS is loads better now he's 4. Not saying he doesn't still do it, but it's far from every day and now only when he's tired. Only two years to go then...

Roca · 27/10/2008 15:05

the tiredness thing is a killer - there is absolutely no negotiating with my dd age 2.5 when she is tired.

Original poster

Sallyallyally · 27/10/2008 15:13

Super...2 more years eh !! Never mind that I'll look thirty years older, and be seen at the school gates swigging from a supermarket own label sherry bottle by then to still my already shakey hands!!

OP posts:

sorkycake · 27/10/2008 15:19

yeah about another 2 years to go, but you'll get better at heading them off and it won't seem so bad.
It's always worse when they've been angels and suddenly develop dictator tendencies. After a few months we get better at anticipating and dealing with them imo.

kwaker5 · 27/10/2008 21:31

sorkycake is right. You'll get better at dealing with them and will learn from them. Don't ditch the buggy yet - very handy for strapping them in and whisking them away from whatever's triggered it!

Sometimes (most of the time) they just have no idea what they want and you just have to decide for them.

sorkycake · 28/10/2008 12:20

Ditto to keeping the buggy.
I'm having no4 in Feb, when Ds2 will be exactly 2 (I think we were on the AN thread together).
He's fab atm wants to walk everywhere, be little Mr. Independent, all good, BUT I will be buying a double buggy because if he turns evil at 2 and I've got 3 running in different directions and a newborn then SS will be called in to deal with the consequences.

Dh didn't think we'd need a double until I pointed out that if they decide to kick off and run in different directions he'd never round them up without police intervention.

Strap him in I say, the time to run free is in the park.....not too far from home.

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