dd (20 months) keeps getting out of her bed 7 or 8 times a night. what the hell do i do?

[beautifuldays]

it's taking 1hr plus to get her to go down for her nap/at bedtime, she gets out of bed, i put her back ad infinitum. she's also getting out of bed and coming into us 7 or 8 times a night.

she's driving everyone round the twist, no-one's getting any sleep incl ds (4) who shares a room with her.

i'm back at work in a few weeks and i just can't go on like this, what the hell do i do? help!

anyone?

talk to her during the day, tell her that at bed time she has to stay in her bed.

then put her to bed with normal routine, if she gets up, very boringly, say bedtime, don't look at her, put her in bed, repeat 3 times, after that dont even say anything, son't look and most certainly dont react

(groan/shout/run up stairs/smile/kiss/)

just gently put her back in bed, leave room, wait and repeat - it's all about attention I reakon (My DS1 did exactly the same thing at about 2.2) - it worked in about 2 nights...

does she 'get' stickers? (forgot what they do at 20 months...though DS2 is getting there soon!) if so bribe with stickers...whole night in bed make a BIG fuss, tell everyone loudly so she can hear how clever she is, then at bedtime tell her teds what she did and how she will do it again! good luck - it is vvvv annoying !

Any clues as to why she is waking up so often in the night?

Just wondering if there is a particular reason she is in a bed, would she be better off back in a cot?

can you put her back in a cot?

I thought that as well, my dts are 20 months and still in cots, they can climb out but don't during the night.

thanks for the replies everyone.

i have tried the putting her back in bed with no talking to her, no kisses etc just keep putting her back into her bed, but it takes an hour or more of this before she gives up and i have been doing it for 2 weeks now. she just thinks it's a big game

she can climb out of her cot...

i have tried talking to her and she says 'me stay in bed' but she never does. i swear she is the one child who would even stump supernanny

i have no idea why she is waking up so often, she's not upset, just appears at the side of my bed grinning think it is habit more than anything

Can you put a stairgate across her door so she can't get out of the bedroom ? This worked for mine but they were in rooms on their own. I also took all the toys out of their rooms when I was transferring to a bed so they didn't get up and play with them in the night. If she knows she can't get anywhere and hasn't got anything to play with then she might think it's not worth getting up.

stairgate - good idea

We did two things which seemed to work:
1/ Bought a bunny clock www.sendaclock.co.uk/allclocks/children~s-bedside-clocks-1/kidsleep-alarm-clock/kidsleep1002a.html and told her that she has to stay in bed until the bunny is awake. It is still in use now and works fine (best investment ever!)

2/ We bought a book called "better bed times" I think. It had a star chart at the back and we put it up in the bedroom.

It took a few days but seemed to work.
Good luck

Second the bunny clock from Kidsleep!

Works a treat. There are different settings on it so you don't have to have the birdsong. You just set the time to switch between bunny in bed and bunny walking in the sunshine. It also provides a very tiny amount of light but not enough to keep waking them.

put her bed in your room for a while? [shrug emoticon]

thanks for all the advice.

do you think a 20month old would understand the bunny clock concept or is it aimed more at older children?

It might be a little bit young for 20 months but only you know your lo.

Even if she is too young, it's a good concept and might at least teach her a little about sleep time versus awake time and eventually she'll get the whole picture IYSWIM (I don't always make myself very clear). It'll come into it's own.

We had this problem with dd at the same age. In the end we put her back in the cot for about 4 months and when we returned her to the bed, she was absolutely fine. Doesn't sound like this is an option for you though...
In the GF Toddler book, she outlines a whole routine to follow if they keep getting out of bed. No idea if it works but it might be worth reading about.
You have my sympathy - it's a nightmare!

My almost 3yr old started to do this also after being in a bed for over a year waking for no reason and kicking up a huge fuss when i put him back to bed so put a stairgate on door and left the door ajar and nightlight as we finally found out he was scared of the dark,it took about a week to stop the tantrums at the gate but now he only wakes if there is a problem
hope it sorts out soon

THANKYOU THANKYOU THANKYOU!!!!

My 2yrs old DS has been getting up up to 10 times a night for ever! He was born with talipes and has to wear a brace at night which I'm sure contributes to his sleep problems. He just wants to get into bed with us and kicks the hell out of me with his boots and bars.

Anyway I read this thread and got the book off ebay which came on saturday it only cost a few quid. I read the story and put his chart up by his bed. Sat night he came throught to me 4 times and I put him back then he came in and went to DH's side an woke him, he put him back to bed. Next I heard him up again and he'd woke up DS1 (9) who had put him in his bed. I went through picked him up reminded him of the star chart and he went to sleep in his own bed with out me sitting next to him or sleeping next to the bed!!! Last night he came through to me twice and again I put him back to bed without saying anything and he sleept till 7am in he own bed!!! I can't tell you how pleased I am I'm really on to something. I didn't think he was old enough for rewards charts but he understands.

Just need the clock now to stop him coming through at all!!

Sorry about the essay but I'm so grateful, Good luck to beautifuldays!!